Episode 376: One Perspective To Change Your Whole Life

06/29/23 • 11 min

One Perspective To Change Your Whole Life

◾️Over the next 7 days, pick an area of your life where you feel like you’re behind, and take the perspective shift of “I am exactly where I’m supposed to be right now.”

Stu’s IG - @stumassengill

One Perspective To Change Your Whole Life

◾️Over the next 7 days, pick an area of your life where you feel like you’re behind, and take the perspective shift of “I am exactly where I’m supposed to be right now.”

Stu’s IG - @stumassengill

Previous Episode

Episode 375: The Forgiveness Gym with Dr. Robert Enright

In this episode of the Finding Direction podcast, I sit down with renowned forgiveness expert Dr. Robert Enright to explore the transformative journey of forgiveness. Dr. Enright shares his insights on how forgiveness can heal the negative effects of injustices and offers practical steps to embark on this path of healing.

But what exactly is forgiveness? According to Dr. Enright, it means being good to those who have not been good to you. He emphasizes the importance of recognizing our own vulnerabilities and the impact of past experiences on our internal world. From there, we can choose the path to healing, seeking support from friends, engaging in physical activities, or even therapy. Dr. Enright challenges traditional methods of healing and encourages us to consider the untried path of forgiveness.

Teaching children about forgiveness is also a crucial aspect of breaking the cycle of hurt in relationships. Dr. Enright shares his expertise on how to introduce forgiveness to children through stories and age-appropriate activities. By practicing forgiveness from a young age, children can develop a forgiving mindset and prepare themselves for the challenges they may face as adults.

If you're ready to start finding direction and experience the power of forgiveness, join me and Dr. Robert Enright on this enlightening podcast episode. Discover how forgiveness can heal, transform, and break the cycle of hurt in your life and relationships.

What We Discuss:

Introduction to Dr. Robert Enright [00:00:00] Dr. Robert Enright's background, his work in forgiveness, and his accomplishments in the field.

Importance of Forgiveness [00:03:32] The significance of forgiveness in healing from injustices and the negative effects of unjust treatment.

Process of Forgiveness [00:07:05] The steps involved in the process of forgiveness, including acknowledging the injustice, making a decision to heal, and expanding one's understanding of the person who caused the harm.

Recognizing the personhood of others [00:11:47] Understanding the importance of seeing others as individuals with their own experiences and emotions.

The process of forgiveness [00:12:48] Exploring the steps involved in the journey of forgiveness, including developing compassion and standing in the pain.

The impact of forgiveness on personal growth [00:14:02] Discussing how forgiveness can lead to a sense of purpose and a desire to help others, resulting in personal healing and growth.

Introducing Forgiveness to Children through Stories [00:22:04] Dr. Enright discusses the importance of teaching children about forgiveness through stories and curriculum guides.

The Global Impact of Forgiveness Education [00:23:11] Dr. Enright shares how forgiveness education is being implemented in over 30 countries, including areas with conflict like Belfast, Galilee, and Taiwan.

Dr. Enright's Journey into Forgiveness Research [00:26:21] Dr. Enright explains how he stumbled upon forgiveness as a research topic and the opposition he faced in academia before forgiveness gained recognition.

Dr. Robert Enright's books on forgiveness [00:34:44] Dr. Enright discusses his self-help books on forgiveness and how they can be helpful to those who want to walk the path of forgiveness.

Taking action to find direction through forgiveness [00:36:17] Dr. Enright suggests committing to do no harm to someone you're annoyed with as a way to start finding direction through forgiveness.

Celebrating a life that lights up your soul [00:37:37] The host congratulates the listeners for not settling for less and encourages them to celebrate a life that brings them joy and fulfillment.

Episode Resources:

Robert Enright's Forgiveness Website (Website)

Next Episode

Episode 377: Unlocking Extraordinary Love: Creating A Thriving Relationship with Dr. Stan Tatkin

In this episode, I interview Dr. Stan Tatkin, a therapist and developer of the Psycho-Biological Approach to Couples Therapy (PACT). We discuss various topics related to relationships, including the different phases of a relationship, advice for single individuals looking for a partner, maintaining curiosity and learning in a long-term relationship, creating a shared purpose and vision, and understanding attachment styles. Dr. Tatkin emphasizes the importance of commitment, communication, and understanding in building a loving and lasting relationship. He also highlights the need for individuals to understand their own needs and the needs of their partner.

What We Discuss:

Finding the Perfect Relationship [00:03:20] Dr. Stan Patterson advises making a list of what the perfect relationship would be, focusing on safety, security, and shared values.

Vetting Potential Partners [00:05:45] Dr. Patterson recommends being specific about relationship expectations and observing potential partners for signs of alignment with those expectations.

Neurobiology of Dating [00:09:17] Dr. Patterson explains how nature uses emotions to drive the procreation and continuation of the species, leading to the initial stages of dating being neurobiologically drugged.

The Excitement of New Love [00:10:31] Explains the initial phase of a relationship where the brain produces chemicals that make us feel excited and focused.

Automating the Other Person [00:12:03] Describes how as the relationship progresses, we start to automate the other person and make assumptions, leading to potential boredom and loss of attention.

Recognizing Familiarity and Disliking [00:14:32] Discusses the phase where we start to recognize familiar traits in the other person, both positive and negative, and how it affects the relationship.

Why are we and what's our purpose? [00:22:30] Discussion on the importance of understanding the purpose and goals of the relationship beyond just emotions.

Creating a shared vision and dealing with deal breakers [00:23:49] Exploration of the need to align on values, culture, and deal breakers to ensure a successful relationship.

Understanding attachment styles [00:30:17] Explanation of how attachment styles developed in childhood can impact how individuals react to stress and interact in relationships.

Island and its family culture [00:34:03] * The speaker discusses how the island's family culture prioritizes performance and appearances over relationships, leading to a fear of dependency and a need for independence.

Threatening behavior of an island [00:35:11] * The speaker explains how islands protect themselves by distancing and avoiding spending time with their partner, leading to feelings of anxiety and insecurity.

Understanding different attachment styles [00:36:14] * The speaker emphasizes the importance of understanding one's own attachment style and that of their partner to avoid causing harm and to create a secure and lasting relationship.

Episode Resources:

Dr. Stan Tatkin Instagram @ drstantatkin (Website)

Dr. Stan Tatkin Website (thepactinstitute.com)

Dr. Stan Tatkin's Best Selling Books (Website)