ERP 283: How To Heal From An Abusive Relationship - An Interview With Triptta Butkovich

A narcissistic personality operates in a way that drains its partner’s emotional, mental, or financial health. During the course of this toxic and abusive relationship, the victim would voluntarily give up their sense of self and boundaries. They would’ve even gone into the state of cognitive dissonance by not actively recognizing their own values in the hopes of pleasing somebody else.

After 16 years of living as a victim of narcissistic abuse, Triptta realized only she could change her situation. She went on doing recovery work to regain that sense of self and rediscover her personal boundaries. Although it’s difficult to go through the healing process, she believes that doing so opens opportunities for a better, healthier partnership and parenthood.

Triptta Neb Butkovich is the founder of DesignYou, a company that helps you discover how to take back your power and learn to love yourself again. Her mission is to provide a safe and open environment for victims of narcissistic and emotional abuse, to help them learn to value themselves and begin to enjoy healthy relationships again.

Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website.

In this episode:

08:32 Unlike those with narcissistic personality disorder, people with narcissistic tendencies can connect with others emotionally.

11:56 A narcissist's survival lies in their way of being. They use their relationships as "supplies" to feel better about themselves.

16:49 Narcissists typically don't change. While it's possible to empathize and sympathize with them, the partner should look into building their own sense of self and setting boundaries in their relationship.

21:14 How Triptta goes about building her sense of self after being abused for so long

24:59 The need to dissolve the relationship depends on whether or not someone has the disorder. Although this doesn't apply to those with narcissistic tendencies, their partner has yet to do some inner processing by reflecting on the following questions: Who am I today? What are my values today? What are the boundaries that I've given up for myself?

29:54 The healing journey using a multi-layered, three-pronged approach on the body, mind, and soul

33:33 How practicing your personal boundaries and decision making aligns with your values and legacy statement

36:24 How to get in touch with Triptta

39:15 Self-healing or doing the recovery work gives an ability to co-create healing with a partner and creates a ripple effect by being an inspiration to children or the community

Mentioned

• DesignYou website
• ERP 226: How To Understand and Deal With a Narcissist – An Interview With Wendy Behary
• ERP 180: What If I Think My Partner Has a Personality Disorder? An Interview With Gabrielle Usatynski
• ERP 162: How To Know If You Are With a Narcissist and What To Do About It – Dr. Lisa Firestone

Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins

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