Durable Dad with Tommy Geary

Does your job define you? Who are you without your job? It's easy for men to get convoluted on their worthiness outside of their job. But when we're able to separate ourselves and understand that our career is independent from our identity, we're able to approach problems at work with a stoic, clear head. We don't take feedback personally. We don't allow projects to interfere with our family life. And we don't lose sleep due to work stress.

We all have past decisions that make us cringe. Things we'd do differently the second time around, given the chance.

But if we don't make peace with those decisions, they'll cause us to procrastinate and overanalyze our decisions today.

They'll make a dent in our confidence and lead us to subconsciously question ourselves when we have a big decision on our plate.

You'll leave this ep with three steps that'll help you make peace with your past decisions so you can be a confident decision-maker today:

1. Awareness – ID the regrets that bubble up when you notice yourself overanalyzing.

2. Language – Stop trying to make the "right" decision and instead work towards the best decision, given your circumstance, information, situation.

3. Confidence – Recognize that you're not perfect, and you're still you can still hold yourself in high regard. You'll make mistakes, and you'll recover

Tune in to learn how to free yourself from past choices and confidently make decisions in the present.

Viktor Frankl's book, Man’s Search for Meaning, gives a different perspective on the question we ask all the time.
I think I had this idea that I’d read the book and have all the big answers.
But it’s actually a lot easier than that.
Frankl said that, “Man should not ask what is the meaning of his life, but rather he must recognize that it is he who is asked.”
Because we create our meaning. And according to logo therapy, we can do that:

• By creating a work or doing a deed.
• By experiencing something or encountering someone.
• By the attitude that we take toward unavoidable suffering.

Join me as we break it down in this episode so you can avoid what Frankl calls the “existential vacuum.” That what’s the point feeling dads get when overwhelm and stress pile up.

What do you do with a comment that catches you off guard? One that really throws you for a loop? Some of us might lash out. Say something we later regret. Or we might freeze and wish we said something after the fact. But there's a third option that allows us to respond from a place of calm wisdom.
There are 2 things we can do to make sure we're caught off guard less often so we can act in a measured way more often:
1. Don't expect a perfect scenario
2. Learn to only care about the important things.
I cover both of these in detail in today's episode. You'll gain access to the part of you that doesn't get triggered easily. Who can roll with the punches without getting walked on. Tune in to respond better to your kids, your coworkers, and your wife when something unexpected gets thrown your way.

Have you ever asked your wife, "What can I do to help?" during chaos in the home?

There's a good chance the question increased her stress level rather than reduced it.

Our wife needs us to think, not just do.

When men don't absorb some of the mental load that comes with leading a family, resentment builds up.

Today's episode will leave you with two main actions that'll help remove pressure from your wife's plate:

1. Step into the CEO role so you can be strategic and proactive.

2. Initiate the "Fair Play" conversation so you can run the household as a team.

Tune in to take on your share of responsibilities so your wife feels supported and the house feels more peaceful.