Navigating Conflict: The Surprising Benefits of Marital Mediation vs. Couples Counseling

05/01/24 • 27 min

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Couples facing challenges or difficulties in their marriage have traditionally turned to couples counseling or marriage therapy for help. And we often hear from clients who are now deciding whether to stay or go that they found the experience of couples counseling to be quite frustrating with lots of blame and finger pointing and little to no resolution of the issues at hand. But what if married couples had another choice?

Enter Marital Mediation.
While both couples counseling and marital mediation share the overarching goal of promoting healthier, more harmonious relationships, they differ significantly in their approaches, methodologies, and intended outcomes.
Couples counseling focuses on exploring and understanding relational dynamics, emotions, and patterns of interaction. Therapists in couples counseling often adopt a more directive or interventionist stance, offering guidance, feedback, and psycho-education to promote positive change.
Marital mediation, by contrast, emphasizes practical problem-solving and negotiation skills. Mediators in marital mediation maintain a neutral stance, refraining from offering advice or solutions. Instead, they facilitate dialogue, negotiation, and problem-solving, empowering couples to generate their own solutions and agreements.
As ADR modalities and processes are becoming more commonly used by families in conflict, we are seeing an expansion of the practice of marital mediation or couples mediation. By offering couples a future focused, problem solving approach, we hope to be able to create agreements that allow the couple to navigate conflict and remain in relationship.

Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:
Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]

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Previous Episode

How Much Will My Divorce (Really) Cost?

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Financial worries are at the top of most everyone’s list when it comes to divorce and one common concern we hear from clients is how much it’s going to cost to get divorced. So in this episode we’re diving into not just how much divorce costs, but the factors that can influence it and how we can work with clients to keep their costs down.
IBISWorld reports that revenue for the Family Law and Divorce Attorney sector is expected to be $12.9 billion for 2023. Whoa! That is a load of money that’s moving from our clients’ bank accounts to pay for the services of divorce professionals. Now we’re not saying that attorneys aren’t worth what they charge - competent legal advice is priceless.

But we are saying that individuals and couples have a lot more influence over the cost of their divorce than they realize. And as most things in divorce and co-parenting, it comes down to how they manage conflict and their decision making.
Listen in as we unpack all the costs that go into divorce, talk about how considering a divorce budget can help clients make strategic decisions, discuss the factors that influence whether our client has a Kia divorce or a Lamborghini divorce, and offer some tools and strategies for staying within their budget goals.

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Next Episode

Post Traumatic Spouse Disorder: How Trauma Impacts Divorce

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It’s well known that divorce can be one of the most stressful life events our clients will experience. And we’ve talked extensively about how fear escalates cost and conflict. But there’s a secret ingredient that can make the process even more difficult and more expensive ... and that’s trauma.
Today we are going to give you some insight into working with clients experiencing PTSD or post traumatic spouse disorder. No, that’s not a real DSM diagnosis, but it is a condition that can affect people who go through extremely contentious divorces.
According to psycholoogytoday.com, “The word 'trauma' literally means wound, shock, or injury". Studies have found that following relationship dissolution, many people manifest symptoms similar to those experienced by people who have survived highly stressful situations.
This means that in some cases, those who experience divorce could experience true PTSD or post-traumatic stress disorder symptoms similar to those who have experienced military combat, natural disasters, sexual assault, or other life-threatening events.
Coaching a client in trauma presents some extra challenges because their alarm system is going off and when we feel threatened, it’s hard to have the same level of self-awareness or decision making skills.
Listen in as Tracy and Debra discuss types of trauma, trauma responses, trauma recovery, and strategies for supporting clients struggling with PTSD.