Dadvengers #35 - Rickie Haywood-Williams

Rickie is a TV and radio presenter, currently hosting a daytime show on BBC Radio 1. He also co-hosts his own podcast and most importantly – is a dad!

As a young man Rickie always knew he wanted to be a dad one day, and he became a one to Lola at 32. However, in the back of his mind he knew this relationship wasn’t working out. He soon became a single parent and had to navigate co-parenting with a young baby. This wasn’t always easy but as you will hear he found a way to make it work!

Later in Life Rickie met his now partner, Nat, who also had a daughter of a similar age to Lola. Previous experiences have meant he's settled into the role of stepdad to Dusty and loves it! In this ep, he tells us about how they blended their families and why is it so important to him to ensure both girls are equally included.

Happy to extend their family further they have since added baby Cruz into the mix!

It’s great to hear from a dad who is both a biological and step parent and hear more about the joys and complexities of blended family life!

Huge thanks to Rickie for sharing his story with us 💙

Time Codes

3:00 – “My family was really solid". - Rickie on his family life growing up

5:38 - "When I found out we were having a baby, I wanted to make it work... but ultimately I needed to be happy." - Why Rickie became a single parent to Lola

10:47 - "Get rid of the ego... this isn't about you, it is about the child." - Rickie shares how he and Lola's mum created a positive co-parenting relationship

14:04 - "Having to share her with somebody is hard... but he is great"- Accepting another parental figure in Lola's life.

18:06 - "My dad is very emotionally closed,... I see a lot of him in my behaviour." - Rickie on his relationship with his own dad and patterns we learn from our parents!

21:30 - "Once it sunk in, she got a bit jealous. She had her whole life of never having to share me" - Introducing a new partner into his life with Lola.

26:05 - "I am not here to be anything other than what Dusty wants me to be" - Rickie on his role as a step-dad.

30:28 - "Dusty is going to see that show as well and there is no mention of her... I thought how I would feel if I was Dusty, it really hurt me." - How Rickie works to ensure both his daughters are always included in his life, publicly and privately.

34:34 – "I feel like that is one of my strengths..." - Rickie on his strength's as a dad.

37:15 – "I don’t ever want anybody to feel like left out, or isolated... I am part of that" - Rickie on talking to his extended family about all of his kids!

40:50 - "100% it is different... ! I say to her, we have each other don’t feel you have to do this by yourself." - Rickie tells us his feelings on becoming a parent again, and sharing the load with your partner!

45:00 – "Never say never, but I don’t think I’m ever having another baby after this... I’m good!" - Why this is Rickie's last child... for now!!

46:54 - "They grow so quickly, this time around I want to miss as little as possible with Cruz". - Why Rickie isn't keen on leaving his son overnight!

54:24 - Rickie's Dad Superpower

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