Anniversary Inspiration
04/19/21 • 8 min
“There are only two things that you need to do to make your anniversary special for you and for your kids.”
— Allison Villa
How do you celebrate a special anniversary in a meaningful way while in the middle of a pandemic?
Anniversaries are a wonderful milestone for several reasons — they’re an opportunity to celebrate your relationship, look back on much you’ve grown together, and spend some time reconnecting on a romantic level.
On a personal level, this is a special episode of the podcast, as my husband Arjan and I celebrated our 10-year anniversary recently!
Arjan and I spent some time last year discussing how we wanted to celebrate this milestone. We even talked about possibly taking a trip to Iceland.
(This was before the onset of the pandemic. Obviously, we didn’t end up taking the trip, though we may still do so in the future!)
During a pandemic, dining out or traveling aren’t the easy options that they used to be, if they’re options at all. But, that’s actually okay! Because while grand gestures and big plans are a lovely way to celebrate your relationship, you do not have to go all out to mark your anniversary with meaning.
In order to make the day meaningful for both you and your partner and for your children, you really only need to do two things:
- Do one thing for you and your partner as a couple.
- Do one thing with your partner and children as a family.
In the case of couple time, you will need to ask for help from your extended family, friends, or community to make it happen, but this time spent as a couple will be so beneficial for your relationship.
Listen to the episode to learn more about the simple, meaningful things that you can do to mark your anniversary (even in lockdown), and how Arjan and I celebrated our 10 years together.
In this episode of Couplehood, you’ll discover:
- Why it’s so important to include your kids in your anniversary celebrations
- The #1 reason why the people around you will likely be happy to help you celebrate your anniversary as a couple
- How to let yourself be open to receiving the support that you need
“When you’re marking your anniversary, find a way to ask your community for support... If you don’t ask, then you’re not able to receive that support.”
— Allison Villa
Highlights:
- 00:37 10-year anniversary!
- 01:19 Mark your anniversary with meaning
- 01:34 Help from your community
- 02:27 What it looked like for us
- 05:05 Celebrating as a family
- 07:00 Letting yourself receive support
Links:
Work With Me:
Follow Me on Instagram:
https://instagram.com/allison__villa
Please remember to subscribe, rate, and review!
“There are only two things that you need to do to make your anniversary special for you and for your kids.”
— Allison Villa
How do you celebrate a special anniversary in a meaningful way while in the middle of a pandemic?
Anniversaries are a wonderful milestone for several reasons — they’re an opportunity to celebrate your relationship, look back on much you’ve grown together, and spend some time reconnecting on a romantic level.
On a personal level, this is a special episode of the podcast, as my husband Arjan and I celebrated our 10-year anniversary recently!
Arjan and I spent some time last year discussing how we wanted to celebrate this milestone. We even talked about possibly taking a trip to Iceland.
(This was before the onset of the pandemic. Obviously, we didn’t end up taking the trip, though we may still do so in the future!)
During a pandemic, dining out or traveling aren’t the easy options that they used to be, if they’re options at all. But, that’s actually okay! Because while grand gestures and big plans are a lovely way to celebrate your relationship, you do not have to go all out to mark your anniversary with meaning.
In order to make the day meaningful for both you and your partner and for your children, you really only need to do two things:
- Do one thing for you and your partner as a couple.
- Do one thing with your partner and children as a family.
In the case of couple time, you will need to ask for help from your extended family, friends, or community to make it happen, but this time spent as a couple will be so beneficial for your relationship.
Listen to the episode to learn more about the simple, meaningful things that you can do to mark your anniversary (even in lockdown), and how Arjan and I celebrated our 10 years together.
In this episode of Couplehood, you’ll discover:
- Why it’s so important to include your kids in your anniversary celebrations
- The #1 reason why the people around you will likely be happy to help you celebrate your anniversary as a couple
- How to let yourself be open to receiving the support that you need
“When you’re marking your anniversary, find a way to ask your community for support... If you don’t ask, then you’re not able to receive that support.”
— Allison Villa
Highlights:
- 00:37 10-year anniversary!
- 01:19 Mark your anniversary with meaning
- 01:34 Help from your community
- 02:27 What it looked like for us
- 05:05 Celebrating as a family
- 07:00 Letting yourself receive support
Links:
Work With Me:
Follow Me on Instagram:
https://instagram.com/allison__villa
Please remember to subscribe, rate, and review!
Previous Episode
Arjan's Lens: From Breakdown to Breakthrough
“I really had to look inwards... I finally started to also be honest with myself, in terms of how I was feeling.”
— Arjan Haak
There are two sides to every story. And to drive that point home, my guest for this episode is my husband, Arjan Haak.
You first heard about Arjan during the first episode of this podcast, where I talked about my From Breakdown to Breakthrough story.
(If you haven’t yet heard it, I do recommend going back and listening to that episode first.)
As Couplehood is a podcast about, well, couplehood, I thought that it would be interesting to bring Arjan on to talk about his side of the experience.
The Breakdown to Breakthrough story began six years into our marriage, after we both reached some pretty significant milestones. We’d already gotten married, bought our own home, and had two beautiful children. But that year, I had just received my professional designation as a psychotherapist and Arjan had just landed a full-time job with benefits — two milestones that we had been working toward for some time.
Even after crossing all of these amazing milestones off the list, I felt empty and defeated.
Arjan, on the other hand, felt great.
Coming to Arjan with my feelings was scary, because I felt that it meant that we were no longer compatible as a couple.
For Arjan, receiving this information was just as challenging... but it led to an awakening.
While he initially resisted, he was eventually driven to check in with himself and acknowledge that he had some mixed feelings about where we were in our lives.
Learning how to push through avoidance and face uncomfortable truths can be the difference between strengthening your relationship... or sinking it.
In this episode of Couplehood, you’ll discover:
- The importance of breaking out of autopilot, checking in with yourself, and honestly assessing whether you’re getting what you need
- Why it’s vital to push through denial and avoidance when faced with challenging honesty
- 3 action items that can take you from breakdown to breakthrough
“That is the ultimate gift to your kids — you being honest with yourself about who you are, and what joy, happiness, and success look like for you.”
— Allison Villa
About Arjan Haak
Arjan Haak is Allison’s husband and an avid cyclist. He lives in Toronto with Allison and their two children. He is an exceptional graphic designer.
Highlights:
- 00:24 Meet Arjan Haak
- 01:30 From breakdown to breakthrough: the other side
- 05:57 “Are you happy?”
- 08:00 Strengths & weaknesses
- 09:30 It starts with one person’s honesty
- 10:37 Coping & coasting seasons
- 12:22 Taking tough honesty seriously
- 14:57 Changing priorities & beliefs
- 17:01 Arjan’s job loss
- 19:22 From shock to hope
- 21:37 Back to Toronto
- 23:31 Conversations leading to growth
- 25:03 Action items
Links:
Work With Me:
Follow Me on Instagram:
https://instagram.com/allison__villa
Please remember to subscribe, rate, and review!
Next Episode
A Strong Foundation Lasts a Lifetime
“It’s not easy to parent if you’re not on the same wavelength.”
— Jake
Welcome to the first episode of the Sandbox Spotlight series, a limited series featuring interviews with real-life couples talking about their real-life experiences! In the series, we’re going to talk about their challenges, their joys, and how they successfully navigate the four relationship seasons.
If you haven’t listened to my episodes on the relationship seasons, I recommend you check them out first!
My guests for this episode are Mel and Jake, founding members of my online community the Couples Sandbox. Mel and Jake have been together for 17 years and are the parents of two toddlers.
Mel and Jake came to me for couples counselling when they were in the Coping season — they were relieved to learn that the Coping season was temporary and to learn tools and strategize to manage the issues that came up during that season.
Learning about the relationship seasons helped Mel and Jake understand the ways that external factors impact their relationship and how they can work together as a team to manage them with kindness and empathy.
Joining Couple’s Tune-Up and Couple’s Sandbox helped them move from the Coping season to the Coasting season and then into the Connected season. In this interview, they look back on what they’ve learned, how they use it, and the impact it’s had on their relationship!
In this episode of Couplehood, you’ll discover:
- How relationship tools can not only strengthen your relationship with your spouse, but also your entire family unit
- Why it’s so important to hear other couples talk about the challenges they face and how they overcome them
- A sneak peek into how my Couples Sandbox community works — and how it can fit into your busy schedule!
“I feel like we’re closer than we’ve ever been, in many ways.”
— Mel
Highlights:
- 00:29 The Sandbox Spotlight
- 01:27 The Couples Sandbox community
- 03:54 Meet Mel & Jake
- 05:17 The journey to the Connected season
- 07:37 Reassurance & progress
- 08:45 Working as a team with kindness
- 09:59 Learning from other couples
- 13:02 The impact of connection on the family unit
- 15:14 Visions for the future
- 16:04 How they found Couple’s Tune-Up
- 20:01 ‘Marriage school’
- 21:15 Gratitude
Links:
Join us in the Couple’s Sandbox. The cart is open from May 4 to May 9, 2021.
https://www.allisonvilla.com/couples-sandbox
Work With Me:
Follow Me on Instagram:
https://instagram.com/allison__villa
Please remember to subscribe, rate, and review!
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