Burlington Friendship Society

It’s just Karl and Christian this time. We are too close to the heart of the political season, and it’s difficult to make new friends. Except Bernie. Bernie is everyone’s friend. He’s on a big racist mural to prove it!

Did you know Imperial Burlington is in the third best state to retire to? If that isn’t enough, Metric Burlington is the third best place to retire to in Canada. We’re not frozen misanthropes, we’re just ahead of our time.

It’s true! Unless you’re Kim Davis. But if you’re a friend of ours, you are also friends with Wes!

FriendWes is going to tell us about life in Kentucky — another fine state which has it’s own Burlington. This Burlington your last chance to turn away before entering Ohio. (Though we don’t know why you would — Ohio has TWO Burlingtons. Or Burlingston.)

So go visit Kentucky! It’s not all tobacco and Mitch McConnell! It’s also bourbon and mint juleps!

Hi all!

It’s been a while since we reminded everyone they have friends in Burlingtons all over the world! You do! Truly. Unless you are a racist mural.

To prove it, our new friend Pam from Notburlington York City is going to visit Imperial Burlington, Vermont. She did not know what she’s in for, so she turned to us. Now she is prepared for moose crossings, liberal ice cream, and Bernie Sanders sightings. There is no evil in Vermont except what you bring with you, Pam! Unless you hate black socks with shorts.

Welcome, Pam! Emergency brake is on the left, jackknifed horse accident on the left.

In our second friendly episode, we welcome Friend Blake Smith from Atlanta — the Burlington of Central Georgia. We also get an update on Imperial Burlington’s white people mural (they had a meeting) and we learn Metric Burlington is replacing its pizza with something French.

We also take our first tentative steps towards building an Official Tinder Profile. This trend could become alarming.

Welcome to the Burlington Friendship Society! Your Burlington Friends Karl and Christian to talk about being friends and living in Burlingtons. In the end, we are all Burlingtoners. Although not all of you Burlingtoners have vaguely racist murals in your shopping districts.