BOMcast! - Episode 27 with Mike and Cousin Sterling

Episode 27 with Mike and Cousin Sterling

Explicit content warning

08/18/23 • 47 min

BOMcast!

Mike and Cousin Sterling help us put a nail in The Book of Jacob Chapter iii and not a moment too soon. This has to be the worst parable ever. It's like a Martha Stewart had a breakdown and started maiming olive trees to get back at an ex kind of vibe. Also, did you know that Avatar blue is the bitterest color in the universe? Of course, you did.
But also, that might make it even more brilliant. Joseph writes this sad sack, street dwelling, chronic masturbater in Jacob, and Jacob gives us the worst parable. If you think about it even a little bit, it messes with you 'cause that's what a genius would do!

Previous Episode

Episode 26 with Nate

Nate gives us the best opening story so far and then we're in it. We cast Rick Moranis as Jacob and Jacob tries his best to measure up to his dad and older brother with an extend parable/analogy involving an Olive Vineyard.
That's right. Not an olive orchard, grove, or garden. A vineyard because unfortunately, Joseph Smith couldn't imagine anything profound that wouldn't get you drunk. Fortunately, we were so we powered through. And you all get to meet the worst boss ever--he's like a teenage manager who lords over that he knows everything even though the only reason he knows everything is because he started working at Olive Garden 2 years before you. Like do you even want to get to that level of expertise if it takes slinging breadsticks and salad to the undiscerning masses?
Jk, everyone knows Olive Garden is the best place to take in-laws.

Next Episode

Episode 28 with Michael

We are joined by Michael, no stranger to podcasting, and we get to dive into the juiciest tale so far in BOMcast!
Tell me Jacob's a low-energy beta without telling me he is... start a story with an apology, regularly use the wrong agricultural terms (olive vineyard much?!), and rebuff the advances of the one beautiful soul in this world who cares about you whilst you go on about some idea you stole from Zenos (Jesus!, how could a prophet with such a badass name produce the worst parable ever?) and butcher it in the retelling.
Jacob and Sharem's relationship is beyond sus, but, for reals, Sharem sounds lovely. This is obviously a Smithers-Burns moment, and Jacob, in classic Burnsian fashion, is unworthy of Smithers's love. Jacob tries to write Sharem out, and in probably his best work, Jacob writes an elaborate and ignominious death for Sharem when Sharem obviously can no longer justify his affection for this tired and dirty prophet.
Then Enos brings us home with a French salutation. Didn't see that one coming, did you?