Billow Waggle Dangle

BWD #60: Rube Goldberg Suicide Machine (PLAY EPISODE)

Kevin Clarke and Travis Vogt, stand-up comedians and recipients of a lifetime supply of BBQ Hot Pockets, visit the podcast to jabber about:

• Travis tells the harrowing story of getting stuck in a ketamine den after trying to borrow a quart of milk from his neighbor
• Suicide machines that can kill AND prank you
• Trainspotting 2: Plague of Babies
• Star Trek: The Next Generation and how the space-future is super space-racist
• Reel-to-reel gay porn and crossing boners

Stay tuned for next week’s episode starring Kevin and Travis in Film Title Improv, a game in which we make up film titles like Soylent Peen, President Dinosaur, Tell Them Sass Macklemore Sent Me, and then improv what those horrible, horrible movies might be like.

Check out Kevin and Travis’ many, many hilarious videos on their Funny or Die page. You can also check them out on Wonder and Risk, where Kevin reviews bizarre movies and Travis teaches children lies about animals with his Kritter Korner column.

Check out one of my favorites, The Celebrity Shorthand Index. How will you know how to abbreviate celebrities’ names otherwise?

BWD #59: Booze and Botched Circumcisions (Pt.2) (PLAY EPISODE)

On part two of this episode, Gavin, Thomas and I talk about France’s ban on face coverings and the subsequent partying in the streets by French Muslims (pic related - her hair looks great!), as well as the turgid rise and fall of Anthony Weiner.

If you like Gavin, or are just a fan of neat stuff, check out his column Beer and a Shot over at Grungecake.com. He writes about rap, racism and Twinkies.

BWD #58: Booze and Botched Circumcisions (Pt.1) (PLAY EPISODE)

In part one of this episode, Gavin recounts one booze-filled day that both destroyed and restored his faith in humanity while Thomas shocks and amazes us with his tales of rebuffed niceties and botched circumcisions. We also talk about the shiny dorsal fin and hairy belly of Seattle’s peeps; Zimmerman’s fiery redemption on Florida’s highways; and old guys telling Thomas to fuck off.

BWD #57: Driving While Black (Pt.2) (PLAY EPISODE)

In part two of this episode, Gavin, Thomas and I use our faceholes to talk about:

• Detroit is now a bankrupt, Mad Max vampire pleasuredome
• EUR, Rome is a the Detroit of Italy
• The delightful experience of being in the same room with several of your ex-sensual bedding partners
• Dolphins are perverts, but then again, humans are too. Required reading for this episode: “Wet Goddess”, by Malcom J. Brenner
• The problems with unions and bad tippers
• How it’s probably not hard to get a blowjob in the homeless community
• Quote of the Episode: “I don’t think she has the vaginal musculature to project piss in such a manner.” - Gavin

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BWD #56: Driving While Black (Pt.1) (PLAY EPISODE)

In part one of this episode, Gavin and Thomas talk the talk about:

• George Zimmmerman shooting children
• Race riots
• Stories about getting pulled over for a DWB infraction (Driving While Black)
• How our genes LUST for diversity
• Boys prefer boobs and ketchup; men prefer asses and mustard

If you think coriander is underrated, go like BWD’s Facebook page.