#130 - What to Do When You Regret Saying Yes to a Request

Beyond Bitchy: Mastering the Art of Boundaries

04/14/21 • 27 min

We’ve all been there: you say “yes” to a request or accept an invitation, then realize that it just doesn’t work for you. But are you allowed to change your mind even if you’ve already said yes? As counterintuitive as it might feel, the short answer is that you always have the right to change your mind. And if you think your situation is an exception to that rule, then this episode is for you!

Biggest Takeaways From Episode #130:

You always have a right to change your mind, no matter what. This may not always be easy to do, but you have a right to do so every single time.
If you’ve agreed to a request and now regret your answer and want to change it, you’re free to say something like, “I need to let you know that the agreement that I made with you no longer works for me.”
When you’re renegotiating an agreement or changing a “yes” to a “no,” avoid accusations, judgments, or language like “that’s ridiculous.” This isn’t helpful and won’t bring you more connection.

Highlights from Episode #130:

Welcome to the show! Vicki shares a big milestone for the podcast, and talks about the next Boundaries Clarifier Workshop, which is coming up on April 27th. [00:39]
We hear about the topic of today’s episode, which was inspired by a listener’s question. [02:23]
Do you have the right to change your mind if you’ve already said yes to something? [07:23]
Vicki reviews what it means to make a request, and relates this to the listener’s question. [09:31]
We learn why “I felt like I had no choice” is technically an inaccurate statement, and why that’s so important. [13:19]
What do you do when you’ve agreed to do something and regret your choice? [16:06]
After you say that you can no longer do what you agreed to, stop talking. [20:28]
Vicki discusses what to do if the person you’re talking to tries to change the subject when you tell them that you’ve changed your mind. [23:59]

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