The Lies We Tell Ourselves in Life Stories - All Saints Day - Episode 50

10/27/20 • 37 min

Overall Takeaway

Jesus turns the shame-filled, anxiety-ridden narratives of our lives into redemption and transformation. Often, we don’t recognize that when we’re on that journey, and it takes effort to gain that perspective.

Key Verses From Sunday Readings

“These are the ones who have survived the time of great distress;
they have washed their robes
and made them white in the Blood of the Lamb.”

“Beloved, we are God’s children now;
what we shall be has not yet been revealed.
We do know that when it is revealed we shall be like him,
for we shall see him as he is.”

“Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for theirs is the Kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are they who mourn,
for they will be comforted.”

Where Catholicism Meets Psychology

Remember that we didn’t create ourselves. We’re all handed the context of our lives, and we’re called to live it out in a unique way in our journey toward heaven.

We are not the authors of our life narrative; we are the editors. From a psychological perspective, we can change our perception about the events of our lives to see Providence and grow nearer to seeing us as God sees us: as His beloved children.

Remember that you're the protagonist of your story, and that God always gives you a guide to help you along your journey as the “hero” of your story. That may be God the Father, Mother Mary, one of the saints, or someone here on earth.

When we experience shame, we accept the story that someone else tells us about our lives, which is often inaccurate or simply false.

If our story involves great pain, we sometimes come up with a different story to cope. In the short term that can be helpful, but it often causes anxiety and despair in the long run. We need to find a different way to bring a new meaning to our pain and our story. We need to find and accept that transformation that God is waiting to give us.

Action Item

Pick something that has been difficult in your life. What negative emotion do you experience when you recall that part of your story? Now, pause, and think about where you go with that emotion? Does it go to a lie? Apply the story of saints to your story: when suffering comes, find ways to find repentance or purification, and then make a path decision. Go to your guide, pray, and ask how you’re supposed to see your narrative in a new light. Ask God how He wants you to see yourself.

Overall Takeaway

Key Verses From Sunday Readings

“These are the ones who have survived the time of great distress;
they have washed their robes
and made them white in the Blood of the Lamb.”

“Beloved, we are God’s children now;
what we shall be has not yet been revealed.
We do know that when it is revealed we shall be like him,
for we shall see him as he is.”

“Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for theirs is the Kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are they who mourn,
for they will be comforted.”

Where Catholicism Meets Psychology

Remember that we didn’t create ourselves. We’re all handed the context of our lives, and we’re called to live it out in a unique way in our journey toward heaven.

When we experience shame, we accept the story that someone else tells us about our lives, which is often inaccurate or simply false.

Action Item

Previous Episode

Understanding Superiority Complexes - 30th Sun of Ord Time - Episode 49

Overall Takeaway

People who have superiority complexes are usually trying to make themselves feel better by belittling others. When we can understand what’s behind the attitude, it can help us be more compassionate and loving toward them.

Key Verses from Sunday Mass Readings

“Thus says the LORD:
‘You shall not molest or oppress an alien,

for you were once aliens yourselves in the land of Egypt.’”

“Brothers and sisters:

You know what sort of people we were among you for your sake.

And you became imitators of us and of the Lord,

receiving the word in great affliction, with joy from the Holy Spirit,

so that you became a model for all the believers

in Macedonia and in Achaia.”

Where Catholicism Meets Psychology

When we interact with someone exhibiting a superiority complex, we tend to either take a helpless stance and become a victim or we create our own superiority complex to try to compensate.

In some cases, our psychological reaction is to just accept it because “that’s the way he/she is,” be angry about it, or even gravitate toward it.

Take a step back to think about what’s driving that behavior. Often, we brush it off as someone simply being mean or difficult.

The Pharisees exhibited a superiority complex because they felt threatened by Jesus’ work, healing and teaching. Sometimes Jesus punctures that attitude to teach them a lesson, but this week He gently shows them the correct path.

We need to learn who we are not by taking on a superiority persona, but through the eyes of someone who loves us. If we are well-grounded ourselves, we can see those who exhibit superiority more as God sees them, in their woundedness.

Action Item

Think of a situation when someone in your life exhibited superiority. Replay that scene and notice your reaction is or how you are triggered. You don’t need to excuse inappropriate behavior, but see if you can look past the exterior and see the person as a small child, see the insecurities. Can you soften your reaction?

Next Episode

Some Things Can’t Wait Until The Last Minute - 32nd Sun of Ord Time - Episode 51

Overall Takeaway

We are called by Wisdom, or the Holy Spirit, to grow in virtue and our relationship with God over the course of our lives, but we often face common psychological reasons that get in our way.

Key Verses from Sunday Mass Readings

“Resplendent and unfading is wisdom,
and she is readily perceived by those who love her,
and found by those who seek her.”

“O God, you are my God whom I seek;
for you my flesh pines and my soul thirsts.”

“We do not want you to be unaware, brothers and sisters,
about those who have fallen asleep,
so that you may not grieve like the rest, who have no hope.”

"The kingdom of heaven will be like ten virgins
who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom.
Five of them were foolish and five were wise.
The foolish ones, when taking their lamps,
brought no oil with them,
but the wise brought flasks of oil with their lamps.”

Where Psychology Meets Catholicism

Intelligence is different from wisdom. We can have intelligence with evil, but we cannot have wisdom with evil. Wisdom is alive, a personification of the Holy Spirit.

We are called to be more God-like in our relationships. Consider the mode of receiver; sometimes it can be prudent to not say something that is true.

Wisdom seeks us out; it comes to us if we’re receptive to that gift of God. We are called during our lives to build up our “oil” -- our virtues, our human formation, our spiritual formation. We need to be deliberate so we are ready for the wedding feast.

Just like the unprepared virgins could not “borrow” oil, we can’t borrow a relationship with God, virtues or human development at the end of our lives.

Action Item

Try to assess your “readiness” this week. Consider your prayer life and think specifically about the human things that get in the way. For example, do you struggle with lack of discipline or structure that leads you to forget to pray? Is there a lack of accountability to prayer? Do you feel you have to be perfect in your prayer? These things tend to also get in the way of our human relationships as well.