Ep 5 | Get Rid of Fillers in Public Speaking & Even Conversations [ Season 2 ]

03/07/22 • 30 min

ADVANCE: Take Your Next Step with Mike Acker

Why do you think so many of us use fillers in communication, stammer when stressed, and are unable to reach the audience's minds through our words? Because sometimes, we need some time to think before we say something. And the best way (we think) we can buy that is by using fillers or other inefficiencies in communication.

Today, Mike coaches podcaster and content creator Adam Macias on communication, LIVE on the Advance Podcast. Kill your fillers and communication discrepancies as Mike chats with Adam about his life and business to demonstrate the different ways in which ineffective communication show up and how to avoid them.

You'll learn to slow down your speech (naturally), pause whenever necessary, and do a simple exercise to help you with your communication quickly! Tune in.

EPISODE 5 [SEASON 2] SUMMARY & HIGHLIGHTS

What are the four things you need to avoid in communication?

05:19

The four things to avoid in communication are:

1) Fillers

2) Elongation

3) Stammer

4) Garbage words

How do you avoid using fillers?

09:50

Replace fillers with pauses. Our vocal speech is very different from a written speech. When speaking, we need to pause more often in our expression and allow little gaps in between.

How do you slow down your speech?

14:45

Practice pauses. You might think that makes you talk a lot slower and that adding up words makes you speak faster, but it does not. If you think your pause would take long, ask for a second.

What is the mirror exercise for communication?

21:45

Stand in front of the mirror for two to ten minutes and read a book. You’ll be able to assess your body language and way of communicating effectively using this method.

KEY QUOTES:

09:25-09:28

“The more we think about it, the more we want to do it.”

19:00-19:03

“Pauses allow you to stop before you say something you shouldn't.”

20:20-20:35

“If you'll just take a moment and fill up your belly, then you'll feel more peace, and you'll have more power, and pauses allow you to do that. Pauses allow you to analyze the room; pauses allow you to smile.”

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You'll learn to slow down your speech (naturally), pause whenever necessary, and do a simple exercise to help you with your communication quickly! Tune in.

EPISODE 5 [SEASON 2] SUMMARY & HIGHLIGHTS

What are the four things you need to avoid in communication?

05:19

The four things to avoid in communication are:

1) Fillers

2) Elongation

3) Stammer

4) Garbage words

How do you avoid using fillers?

09:50

Replace fillers with pauses. Our vocal speech is very different from a written speech. When speaking, we need to pause more often in our expression and allow little gaps in between.

How do you slow down your speech?

14:45

Practice pauses. You might think that makes you talk a lot slower and that adding up words makes you speak faster, but it does not. If you think your pause would take long, ask for a second.

What is the mirror exercise for communication?

21:45

Stand in front of the mirror for two to ten minutes and read a book. You’ll be able to assess your body language and way of communicating effectively using this method.

KEY QUOTES:

09:25-09:28

“The more we think about it, the more we want to do it.”

19:00-19:03

“Pauses allow you to stop before you say something you shouldn't.”

20:20-20:35

CONNECT WITH ADAM

Daily Misinformer

CONNECT WITH MIKE

Previous Episode

Ep 4 | Zoom Better [ Season 2 ]

Technology is progressing at an exploding pace. Since the pandemic, remote conversations and conferences have increased, something that wasn’t normal to most of us before. But whatever the cause, we’re all forced to adapt to the change. And it starts with learning effective virtual communication.

In this episode of the Advance Podcast, Mike teaches you how to make the best out of virtual conferencing and communication by sharing the three specifics to doing it right. He teaches you to convert the virtual communication “obstacle” into an opportunity to have meaningful conversations with people anywhere, from anywhere. Listen in to learn more!

EPISODE 4 SUMMARY & HIGHLIGHTS

Why do many people find virtual communication challenging?

03:42

There are two different modes in which people operate: the social mode and the solo mode. In the social mode, even if you’re an introvert, you’re in the mental state to talk to people openly. You’re attuned to your ears, body, and are fully physically present in the conference room or sales meeting or wherever you are in the social setting.

When in solo mode, you’re with your computer doing your job, managing tasks for yourself by yourself. When the pandemic happened, everything started to occur at the same time, your social mode started to run over your solo mode. People started behaving the same way in social mode even when in solo mode. That kind of behavior de-energizes the whole room.

How can you improve virtual communication?

08:03
1. Get a decent setup. It doesn’t have to be expensive, but it has to be decent. Look professional. Invest some time in a backdrop, get some lights behind the camera, blackout curtains for any windows that add light where you don't want it, a good camera, and a microphone.

11:26
2. Eye-contact. Be able to speak to the other people in the eye. Set up the lighting and background in a way that’s less distractive. Position your camera in a way that you’re able to look at it while you speak.

13:55
3. Energy-level. Treat yourself well, aim at putting our best foot forward, give your best shot. Use gestures and good communication practices to sound energetic and present.

KEY QUOTES:

06:59-07:05

“Anytime you're virtual conferencing, start acting like you're with people.”

07:42-07:46

“A whole bunch of people being de-energized, de-energizes the room.”

18:39-18:53

“Zoom is an obstacle and an opportunity. An obstacle because we're not right here together holding hands. I'm not doing this training in person. It's also an opportunity because I can do this training for you wherever you are and have viewers around the world.”

RESOURCES MENTIONED ON THE PODCAST

● BOOK: Speak & Meet Virtuallyby Mike Acker

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Next Episode

Ep 6 | Speak and Lead Team Members [ Season 2 ]

What is the most effective way to communicate with your direct reports? Have you considered guiding them with questions, helping them figure out solutions and improvement ways by themselves, or do you still follow the traditional lead-with-answers methodology?
In this episode, Mike discusses why the former method is the most effective in leading your team with confidence while naturally instilling in them qualities of accountability and responsibility. You’ll learn the three Ps to asking questions to your direct reports and the four Cs to parenting levels and see how the two combine in effective leadership.
Learn to become a natural leader to your direct reports in this episode. Tune in now!
EPISODE 6 SUMMARY & HIGHLIGHTS
What must you keep in mind when speaking to direct reports?
04:52
Lead them through questions. You don’t have to tell your direct reports what to do because they can often figure it out themselves; maybe sometimes, you’ve to direct them towards it. The 3 Ps to asking questions helps include:
[05:38]
Psychology: When you’re being asked questions, your brain tries to get ready to respond to them. That means, even if the brain were in a passive state until then, it would jump to being active when asked questions.
[08:44]
Problem: Answering someone’s questions requires humility and time. Initially, a sense of pride may come over, which is a problem, but as humility gradually replaces your problem of pride, you’ll realize how beneficial it is to lead them through questions.
[11:17]
Process: Figure out how you must ask questions. When done properly, asking questions is a highly effective way of leading.
How do you lead people through questions the right way?
11:38
Go slow: If you’ve been the answer-teller all this while, it might take time for your people to adjust to this new attitude. Implement the practice slowly so that everyone is comfortable with the changes.
12:14
Go methodological: Have a flow of questions. Go from one point to the next. The four Cs of parenting: Commander, Coach, Counselor, Consultant, explain what the different parenting levels teach you about work and leadership.
What are the four Cs of parenting?
12:37
Commander: This is the stage where you're telling your children what to do. You're the boss in charge of their actions, helping them understand right and wrong.
13:21
Coach: After early middle school, your role with your child becomes that of a coach. You help them see the pros and cons, weigh the good and bad, and help them understand the implications of different choices. In this stage, you're helping them manage the outcome.
14:12
Counselor: As kids get older, you won't weigh the pros and cons of a situation with them. You help them process what they think is a good idea.
14:50
Consultant: The last stage is that of a consultant. This comes at the point where your kids have moved out of the house and ask your opinion about situations. They might take it or leave it, but your role as a consultant is to be a good advisor to them.
KEY QUOTES:
01:37-01:51
“If your speaking is higher, then people will assume that your leadership is equally as high. But if your speaking is lower, and even though you're a great leader able to get things done, then people will assume that your leadership is much lower.”
07:16-07:29
“When you ask a question, instead of just telling them what to do, start putting it back on them and leading them through a series of questions... What happens (then) is they start having to take ownership of the issue.”
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