022: Rampant on a Bösendorfer

Explicit content warning

02/06/23 • 76 min

The world watched Amos and Edda have sex, thanks to a Belgian breaking news balloon, the kind of balloon that floats through the city of Brussels, filled with at least 10 reporters looking for news stories. And part of how they look for news, we guess, is to peep through windows of buildings and film people without their permission. Seems totally cool. But maybe that's just how "European" they are, and we're all a bunch of American yahoos. Whatever the case, the video (or film as Brooke Mac-El-D prefers to call it) becomes a sensation on the internet. But before that, Juliette, Seth, and some lady named Isabel all see the video/film of Amos and Edda fucking on a piano in a rehearsal space, thanks to the peeping reporters on the news balloon that somehow hovered outside their window for the entirety of their tryst. Edda sees the video/film on her laptop, but keeps Amos from viewing it or even knowing about it. So he is pretty confused when they're on the streets of Brussels and everyone they pass, literally everyone, is craning their necks to look at them. And by craning their necks we mean turning their heads literally completely around. The venue is packed, not "standing room only" as one would normally say, but "crammed to the exit signs." Sure. Amos gets nervous, gets the hiccups, and Edda gives him a look that says, "let's fuck," even though he is five minutes from taking the stage. And that's where we end this episode. (Part 2 of 3)

The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode:

Juliette picks up the satellite broadcast from Brussels, tells Edda about it, and Edda is pleased Isabel has seen it are here.
Edda talks to Seth and then hides the video from Amos are here.
All of Brussels stares at Edda and Amos gets the hiccups again are here.

This episode that we picked up on a satellite broadcast from Brussels includes:

The classic Yahtzee commercial.
Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory
The Wild West
Ethel Merman
La La Land
The Oscar mixup explained.
We're twins!
Wood Burning Kit
Easy-Bake Ovens and the dangers thereof.
The Magic of Making Movies!
Singin' in the Rain
AMC's Nicole Kidman commercial
Breaking News Balloon
Turtlenecks!
Remote controls
The Bechdel Test
Picking up satellite broadcasts
Satellite Balloon / Balloon Satellite
And then this related thing that happened the same day we recorded.
Cirque du Soliel
Woody Allen
Let us never speak of Manhattan
Long-distance and international calls
Fabio killing a goose with his face.
Mike Teevee's mom says Rachmoninoff.
Harold & Maude
Columbo falls down a hill
Broken necks
Johnny Cash

Talk to Us!

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The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode:

This episode that we picked up on a satellite broadcast from Brussels includes:

The classic Yahtzee commercial.
Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory
The Wild West
Ethel Merman
La La Land
The Oscar mixup explained.
We're twins!
Wood Burning Kit
Easy-Bake Ovens and the dangers thereof.
The Magic of Making Movies!
Singin' in the Rain
AMC's Nicole Kidman commercial
Breaking News Balloon
Turtlenecks!
Remote controls
The Bechdel Test
Picking up satellite broadcasts
Satellite Balloon / Balloon Satellite
And then this related thing that happened the same day we recorded.
Cirque du Soliel
Woody Allen
Let us never speak of Manhattan
Long-distance and international calls
Fabio killing a goose with his face.
Mike Teevee's mom says Rachmoninoff.
Harold & Maude
Columbo falls down a hill
Broken necks
Johnny Cash

Talk to Us!

Previous Episode

021: The Hiccups and the Special Way You Made Them Go Away

Buckle up for another epic run of this guy's fucking garbage. We start looking at the story of Amos and Edda finally doing it in Brussels during a cello competition. It begins with Edda making a move on Amos which causes him to have the hiccups, which results in Amos wanting to go home. But Edda claims she has a cure, which is (of course) fucking. As soon as they've done the deed, Edda gets on the phone back home to tell her mom that, yes, she used the same "hiccup cure" that Juliette did when Juliette first humped Elliott. Because of COURSE the women had to be the instigators and the men had to be uncertain, terrified idiots about sex. Amos and Edda can't keep their hands off each other, which means that Amos pins Edda (very uncomfortably) against a piano. This embrace is viewed by a hot air balloon filled with tourists? Prisoners of war? News reporters? It is so very unclear who the people are and why they're in a hot air balloon floating through downtown Brussels. But why should anything ever make sense in this fucking strip? Why? (Part 1 of 3)

The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode:

The ones where Edda comes on so strongly, Amos has hiccups, but she has a cure are here.
The ones where Edda tells Juliette about fucking Amos, then Edda and Amos make out while rehearsing are here.
The ones with the inexplicable spy balloon are here.

This no longer virginal episode includes:

Hangers
Broadway
Britney Spears
Laundry vs. clothes
Catholicism
Madonna vs. whore
Martin Scorsese
High five / down low too slow
The D.A. hairstyle
Lenny Briscoe
Jerry Orbach, Broadway star
The definition of infatuation
Hiccups
Jascha Heifetz
Tuba farts
Amos's Patented Panty-Dropper
Helium balloons in Burbank
Balloon day in church
Cleveland Balloonfest 1986
Liquid mercury
Pirate ship ride
Pro-Butt vs. Am-Butt
All of the hiccup cures
Pausing the recording
Turtlenecks
Syrup bottles
Star Trek: The Next Generation
The End Pin
International Cello Competition
Chicken wire cages
Hot air balloons
The Montgolfier Brothers
The Hindenburg
The Last of Us
News balloons

Talk to Us!

Next Episode

023: A Very, Very Good Glass of Water

After Edda "cures" Amos's hiccups, he takes the stage, first without his cello (hilarious!) and then with it. His performance, which is of course watched via satellite by all of his family and friends, inspires so much passion, that Juliette fucks Elliott on the couch right next to Nan. It also inspires Isabel to have sex with her boyfriend and Seth to make up with Mark, who appears here as a doll or small child. Amos finishes his performance and everyone there loses their minds, throwing their programs in the air and then roses at Amos and Edda. Naturally, the judges unanimously award the grand prize to Amos, who honestly looks like he doesn't give a shit and would rather be anywhere else but there. The victory is short-lived because of the sex tape that everyone saw. You know, because that caused an unfair advantage. Amos asks for another juried performance and then fucks Edda at the press conference. And that's where we leave Brussels, because this just goes on and on and we've truly had enough. (Part 3 of 3)

The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode:

Two Belgian perverts listen to Amos & Edda have sex, Amos & Edda finish having sex, Amos forgets his cello, then Amos forgets he's at a competition are here.
Amos & Edda begin their performance, the audience falls in love, Juliette & Elliott have sex next to Gran, and Isabel accosts her boyfriend are here.
Seth reunites with Mark, the audience throws their programs, the audience throws roses, and Amos gives Edda a rose are here.
Brooke Mac-El-Dee makes an ellipsis joke, Edda floats up to heaven, Amos and Edda get a phone call, and Edda finally has to tell Amos about the sex tape are here.
Amos doesn't care about the sex tape and Amos & Edda have sex at a press conference are here.