A Father's Journey With His Transgender Daughter

03/02/21 • 26 min

Perhaps a common mistake we can make as parents of transgender children is to think that something must be fixed, that we need to say or do something to solve a problem. We might feel stuck in the mud when we see our children suffering and we aren’t able to help them in the way we think would be best. But the truth is, the only thing they want from us is our love and support.

In this episode, we add a special guest to the conversation, Bridget's spouse and Jackie's father, Neal Thornhill. We talk about the journey of having a transgender child from a parent's perspective and how Jackie's experience with announcing her transition publicly made her a stronger person. In the last episode, Bridget shared her first reactions to Jackie coming out as transgender, and today you'll hear how Neal dealt with the news initially and what are, in his opinion, the things every parent should avoid.

Tune in to hear Neal's internal battle between wanting to prevent his family from suffering and feeling powerless in the face of the unknown territory he stepped into.

In This Episode, You Will Learn:

How is it for an unprepared father to deal with his child's transition (8:07)
The priceless value a support group can bring (10:25)
The generational differences in accepting and understanding transgender people (14:58)
There is no problem to be fixed (16:02)
Community, family, and parents' support have a massive positive impact on transgender youths (20:19)

Connect with Jackie and Bridget:

Connect with Neal Thornhill:

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Tune in to hear Neal's internal battle between wanting to prevent his family from suffering and feeling powerless in the face of the unknown territory he stepped into.

In This Episode, You Will Learn:

How is it for an unprepared father to deal with his child's transition (8:07)
The priceless value a support group can bring (10:25)
The generational differences in accepting and understanding transgender people (14:58)
There is no problem to be fixed (16:02)
Community, family, and parents' support have a massive positive impact on transgender youths (20:19)

Connect with Jackie and Bridget:

Connect with Neal Thornhill:

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Previous Episode

Transgender 101 - Begin to Widen Your Horizon

Welcome to the first episode of the Transgender School podcast, where Bridget and Jackie talk about diverse transgender identities and experiences so that we can all be better allies and advocates.

Coming out as transgender is a difficult thing to do, both for the person who's transitioning, as well as for those around them. All of a sudden, reality changes, and major adjustments must be made.

In this episode, Bridget and Jackie provide a comprehensive and clear definition of transgender and share their family story - how Bridget coped with finding out her daughter is transgender, how Jackie experienced this transition herself, and how they embarked on the journey of helping others go through this process with more ease and grace.

Tune in, and join our quest to make the process of coming out and transitioning easier for everyone involved.

In this episode, you will learn:

What transgender means and what it encompasses. (02:24)
How Jackie realized she was transgender. (05:40)
The hardest part of transitioning for most trans people. (06:29)
The importance of using a transgender person’s correct pronouns. (07:05)
Why the ‘old name’ of a transgender person is dead to them and shouldn’t be used anymore. (07:49)
How Bridget responded to the news in the beginning, when she found out that her daughter is trans. (10:17)
The story of how Jackie came out as trans. (12:20)

Connect with Jackie and Bridget:

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Next Episode

Jennifer and Blue Chapman: A Story of Love, Learning, and Mutual Respect Between Parents and Kids

Most children can recognize and label stereotypical gender groups between the ages of 18 to 24 months. They also categorize their own gender at about age 3. As gender stereotypes are usually reinforced, kids might choose to behave in the most rewarding way, according to the gender they perceive as the one they should express. Gender and expression are related, and still, gender identity is not always suggestive of a gender expression, and children's gender expression is not always indicative of gender identity. As parents, we must reduce our interference to none and elevate our support to the maximum; even the slightest indication that we get it can mean the world to them.

In this episode, we had a fantastic conversation with Jennifer Brookings Chapman, host of the Parentingology podcast, Organizational Psychology Doctorate, business owner, and mother of 9-years-old Blue Chapman, who transitioned at age 4. Jennifer kindly shared her experience and some details of Blue's transition and how it was for her and the rest of the family.

Following his older brother Cade, Blue decided to become an actor. He got a part on the show Council of Dads, where he played the role of a transgender boy. Jennifer related how it was for her and Blue to be broadcasted for such a massive audience and the impact she believes more shows with stories like that would have in our society.

Tune in, and hear Jennifer's supportive, evolved, and loving story of her and her son, Blue.

In This Episode, You Will Learn:

The latest news on the Equality Act (5:50)
Jennifer's diverse house and how it helped with Blue's transition (10:48)
The channels Blue chose to communicate his gender choice (15:32)
The importance of not enforcing gender norms on our kids and the impact of little gestures of support (17:25)
Being an ally and the hero complex (24:11)
Loving our kids, diminishing hierarchy, and showing them respect (48:03)

Resources: