The Wild and Wise

ep. #25
Mallika welcomes her husband into a conversation about the trajectory of their 17 year relationship, particularly the elements that have supported authentic connection and getting through the dark times of disconnection. He speaks with humor and vulnerability about the reality of conscious parenting while working really hard to meet Mallika in a deep and loving marriage.
The flow of the conversation going something like this:

• The dance of "fighting" that we did for many years - Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson
• Mallika's love language not being met well by Steve - Love Languages
• Our Enneagram Episode on being in relationships
• Do we think we are good parents?
• Ancestral wounds and patterns showing up in our kids
• Priorities in parenting - Raising emotionally healthy kids
• When and why to transition out of RIE parenting
• When we thought our marriage might be over
• Main nuggets that Steve took away from couples therapy
• The impact of jealousy early on in our relationship
• Maintaining attraction to each other as we age
• Are we desensitized to what is attractive to us by porn and media?
• The deeper relational work we both had to do to heal
• Getting through the belly of the beast and emerging into a totally new relationship
• The surprising impact of how much their therapist liked Steve
• How distraction can help find connection
• "Don't go to bed angry" isn't good advice
• Hidden Brain episode on marriage

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ep. #28
Ashley talks with Abigail Heins, a fellow water woman and a deep feeler, weaver, and healer.
This conversation was inspired by the cocreation of Ashley and Abigail to start a water prayer circle for women who are wanting to become mothers, which starts in May!
Topics we touch on :

• Wellness in relationship to openness to other beings, and flow of water
• Abigails path to working with water through the water in the body
• The lymph system as the body's inner rivers
• The connection between sound, water, and creation
• The whales, their songs, and some of their teachings
• The waters connection to life and creation
• Sound as a key to movement and water
• The depth of the prayer to bring children into the world in this time
• The seeds of the water mama circle

Abigail is a womb guardian, a weaver, and a voice of the whales. Fertility, and the natural cycles of life has always been at the core of her passion and work. From teaching on natural birth control and womb blood empowerment, to sharing Ayurvedic breast massage and whale womb healings. Her offerings support people to root into the wisdom of their body and the wisdom of this earth. Intended to support the reclamation of our juicy, pulsing, sensual soul connection to life. Her current focus is to support the wombed ones prepare for conscious conception. To be anchored in their own vessels of love and indigenous roots in this earth, to birth the future generations of star children. You can check out her IG @whalewombweaving and her website ~ wombweaving.com
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Ep. #30
In today's episode, Mallika invites her friend, Elanne Kresser, to share a deep exploration of cultural healing and the hope for education that teaches our children to live within and honor the beautiful space we occupy, birthing a new paradigm of partnership, of tending and of caring for all beings.
Mallika and Elanne have been friends since 2013 and have been in conversation with each other about many topics, from conscious parenting and healthy relating styles, to the current paradigm of "compulsory schooling" and examining or shifting cultural constructs.
Elanne Kresser is devoted to the labor of birthing a world in which all voices, both human and otherwise, are honored. She has practiced in the Ordinary Mind School of Zen for two decades and directed The Dharma School for children for eight years, and her adult life has been dedicated to community-based, culturally-generative, earth-honoring education. She is a practitioner of ancestral and cultural healing and loves supporting others to reclaim their self-worth, life purpose, and sense of belonging. Her people hail from Bavaria, Bohemia, Jämtland, Sweden and England.
Elanne Kresser's Website
Peter Grey
John Taylor Gatto
"Weapons of Mass Instruction" By John Taylor Gatto
Things we touch on in this episode:

• Feeling belonging with place
• Personal wellness = "how able am I to meet the changing conditions of life"
• Wellness is relational
• Animism, at it's foundation, is relationship
• How teaching in today's system that is devoid of meaningful work
• The ancestors are who hands us our culture
• Depth of cultural healing available through getting right with our ancestors
• Tending ancestral connection through education
• A new paradigm of relating and tending and caring
• The natural friction when shifting from an old to a new paradigm
• Distinguishing between education and compulsory schooling and the values at the base of the current schooling structure
• Ways that we can each play a role in starting this shift
• The possibility that we re-imagine schooling is here
• Homeschooling, free-schooling, unschooling, democratic schooling, and the movement for self-directed education
• What practical ways can this be implemented in a schooling setting
• The clarity that can come from ancestral involvement in these projects

Quotes from Elanne:
Wellness requires relationally (12 min)
The ancestors are who hands us our culture (24)
Education is ultimately the transmission of culture (25)

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ep. #31
This conversation and episode is truly one of Mallika's favorite of all time. Lara Veleda Vesta is an author and illistrator, exploring dís-ability, rites of passage, ancestral mythology, folklore and the sacred creative. She lives with Myalgic Encephalomeylitis/Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, a disease caused by viruses and inflammation with an infectious trigger. Prior to her illness, Lara was a university professor teaching classes in English and writing and a PhD student in Philosophy and Religion.
Lara's deep work and knowledge of integrating difficult initiatory experiences, expanded by her use of ritual, research and linguistics, help her blend a beautiful weaving of return to old ways, old knowing and the deep peace that is available to us all.
Explored in this episode:

• Why narrative is so important to healing
• Stages of initiation and rite of passage
• Finding the joy available in healing
• Reorienting our job/to-dos to come from spirit and ancestors
• Sacred life is available to any one of us
• Collective rite of passage this past year
• Redefining our values and letting things go
• How do we know when we are on a "return"
• Ritualizing every aspect of the passage
• Grief is part of the return and integration of the passage
• Silence is integral for sacred work
• The potency of being together in a ceremonial frame
• Illness and disability were hallmarks of initiation in historic stories
• The opportunity and communication that comes through as symptoms of illness
• How to stay out of resistance to pain and other difficult symptoms
• The power and potential of the millions of people who are ill or living with disability
• What is your super power?

Quotes from Lara:
"We need each other's stories so we can know what's survivable."
"What I have found useful is ritualizing every aspect of the process."
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