Consent, Desire, and the Quest to Be Better with Eric FitzMedrud, PhD, Author of The Better Man

11/22/23 • 66 min

The Selfish Gift - Go public with your purpose

This episode is a JUICY one—and not just because we're talking about sex! If you want a deeper, more intimate connection with your partner, you should listen to it. If you've been concerned about the rise of anti-feminist spokesmen like Andrew Tate, you should listen to it. And if you want to write a non-fiction book that heals something in our culture—particularly if you're a therapist—you should DEFINITELY listen to it.
Dr. Eric Fitzmedrud is a therapist specializing in relationship and sexual issues, specifically in helping men improve their sex lives by learning to regulate their emotions, removing sexual entitlement, and honing their sexual consent and negotiation skills. Eric is a speaker, a trainer of other therapists, and a teacher of graduate courses in psychology. His book is The Better Man: A Guide to Consent, Stronger Relationships, and Hotter Sex, a compassionate and practical approach to a topic that is courageous and challenging. In this episode, you'll learn:

Why consent isn’t just about fear and safety—about not making harmful mistakes with your partner. It's also the key to some of our greatest pleasures.
How the narrow confines of traditional masculinity are harming men and their relationships with others.
How patriarchy and capitalism contribute to a sense of entitlement in men—even those who identify as feminists.
How Eric overcame his fear of writing the book—how he navigated processing his own errors around consent to honor those he has hurt in the past, and the rigorous vetting process he used to make sure they were okay with their stories being included.
His take on book promotion and being a public figure—and how being on social media and doing podcast interviews has made him more confident in his message.

For more, check out:
drericfitz.com
maggielangrick.com
wonderwell.press

And follow:
instagram.com/drericfitz
instagram.com/maggielangrick
instagram.com/wonderwellpress
instagram.com/selfishgiftpodcast

Why consent isn’t just about fear and safety—about not making harmful mistakes with your partner. It's also the key to some of our greatest pleasures.
How the narrow confines of traditional masculinity are harming men and their relationships with others.
How patriarchy and capitalism contribute to a sense of entitlement in men—even those who identify as feminists.
How Eric overcame his fear of writing the book—how he navigated processing his own errors around consent to honor those he has hurt in the past, and the rigorous vetting process he used to make sure they were okay with their stories being included.
His take on book promotion and being a public figure—and how being on social media and doing podcast interviews has made him more confident in his message.

For more, check out:
drericfitz.com
maggielangrick.com
wonderwell.press

And follow:
instagram.com/drericfitz
instagram.com/maggielangrick
instagram.com/wonderwellpress
instagram.com/selfishgiftpodcast

Previous Episode

The Elevation Approach to Achieving Work-Life Harmony with Tina Wells, Entrepreneur, Author, and Founder of WNDR LN

If you are struggling with your to-do list and wondering how you'll ever reach the big goals that matter most to you, whether that's writing a book or starting a business, you are going to love learning from today's guest. Tina Wells is a powerhouse who has been featured everywhere from Fast Company to O, the Oprah Magazine. An entrepreneur since the age of 16, she is now a business strategist, speaker, CEO of Relevant Media, and founder of WNDR LN, a chic collection of travel products sold by Target. She's also the author of 20 (going on 21!) books, including a couple of tween fiction series and most recently, The Elevation Approach: Harness the Power of Work-Life Harmony to Unlock Your Creativity, Cultivate Joy, and Reach Your Biggest Goals.

With all those accomplishments under her belt, you'd think Tina was a workaholic who never slept, but guess what? She's not. The key to her success is the same "Elevation Approach" she teaches her clients, students, and readers—a four-part system for building a life that isn't just balanced with work, but in harmony with it. In this episode, you'll learn:

How to achieve not just work-life balance, but work-life harmony. Hint: It's not just about adding more of either to balance the scales; it's about participating in a process and not just allowing things to happen to you.
How the 4 phases of the Elevation Approach are the keys to doing everything you want to do: preparation, inspiration, recreation, and transformation.
Why inclusion and representation are so important in storytelling.
Why being honest about what you don’t know is actually a crucial strength that enhances your ability to grow.
Why discipline is necessary for creativity to flourish.

For more, check out:
tinawells.com
maggielangrick.com
wonderwell.press

And follow:
instagram.com/tinawells
instagram.com/maggielangrick
instagram.com/wonderwellpress
instagram.com/selfishgiftpodcast

Next Episode

Myth-Busting the Publishing Process with Richelle Fredson, Book Proposal Coach and Publishing Consultant

This episode is a no-holds-barred, myth-busting conversation with an incredibly smart and successful publishing professional. Richelle Fredson is a book coach, a publishing consultant, and the host of the Bound + Determined podcast. She's been in the industry for close to 20 years, formerly the director of publicity and book marketing for Hay House, and then part of their book acquisitions team.

Richelle may not use this moniker to describe herself, but many people call her "the six-figure book coach"—and for good reason. She now runs her own business supporting authors in the proposal and book development process, frequently landing them placements with influential agents and Big Five publishers. Today, we're going to scrape all of her best knowledge to expose the blind spots and correct misperceptions that most first-time authors have when starting their publishing journey.
In this episode, you'll learn:

How to make smart publishing decisions and navigate the sea of conflicting advice on the internet.
How to decide which publishing path is best for you: self-publishing, hybrid, or traditional. (Hint: Whether or not you want to be in bookstores plays a big part in it.)
Why putting the work into a professionally developed book plan/proposal is key—even if you’re self-publishing.
What is important and what is not in terms of author platform—size, composition, etc.
What a first-time author can reasonably expect, in terms of bestseller lists, advances, and royalties.

For more, check out:
richellefredson.com
maggielangrick.com
wonderwell.press

And follow:
instagram.com/richellefredson
instagram.com/maggielangrick
instagram.com/wonderwellpress
instagram.com/selfishgiftpodcast