The Miraculous Mindset with Dan O'Connor

“But I’ve sacrificed so much!”How often do you say or think this? “I’ve sacrificed so much for you, I’ve sacrificed so much for this...I DESERVE...”What does that even mean? Sacrifice?I thought I’d look it up.In the Oxford dictionary, sacrifice has many definitions...the first one is “The act of giving up something valued for the sake of something else more important or worthy.” The second definition had to do with slaughtering an animal, and I hope you’re not doing that. The third had to with an act of prayer, the fourth was Christ being crucified (which might be how you feel, but it’s far from reality), and the fifth definition I found particularly interesting: “In games, a loss incurred deliberately to avoid a greater loss, or to obtain a compensating advantage.” I’m going to say that most of us, when we sacrifice, are defining sacrifice either the first or the fifth way. Basically, we’re either giving up something good in hopes of getting something better, or we’re playing a game, or both. None of these definitions states that we WILL be getting something in return, or deserve anything in return. None of them. “Sacrificing” is a gamble, and you don’t deserve anything in return.The only example I’m aware of-- where people selflessly sacrifice—just might be for their children. That’s about it. We go without, and give up things so that our children can have better lives. But even that is something we do because we want to be good parents. This type of sacrifice doesn’t give us heartburn, because we don’t feel we must get something in return.What most of us do, however, is give something up, whether it’s our time, or our money, or satisfying some need we have, and then we expect something in return. And boy do we get mad if we don’t get what we “sacrificed” for. We get mad when we give up one thing, hoping to get something better—something we think of as more valuable—and then we don’t get it! Our children don’t graduate from college, though we sacrificed all those trips to pay for school. Our husband leaves us, after we sacrificed and paid for his law school education. We took care of aging parents, who then left the bulk of their estate to the church. OUR SACRIFICE WAS IN VAIN. Yes, it was. The bet didn’t pay off. We didn’t get the “better thing” we were trying for.In our relationships, for example, we tend to give things up, such as other relationships, our time, our youth, or whatever else we think we give to people, and then we have...take a breath now...expectations. That’s where the trouble begins. We expect and even demand the payoff for our “sacrifice.”We tend to (what we refer to as) sacrifice out of self-interest, and when we don’t get our reward, boy do we get mad. That’s ridiculous. To read the rest, and for more, visit danoconnortraining.com

What if the Wicked Witch of the West was actually right? What if she was simply misunderstood, or framed, or set-up? What if you knew this to be the truth, learned she was a wonderful, innocent person, and knowing this, you were about to sit down and have a meeting with her? How would discovering this truth change your communication style? If we saw the truth of people, we would be compelled to forgive, love, accept, and communicate more effectively with them. In our professional relationships and romantic relationships, we tend to get distracted from truth by facts, forget our communication training, and react to the illusions that are in front of us. Today’s podcast can help. For more, visit danoconnortraining.com

The foundation of any communication training course dealing with personal or professional relationships is knowing that you are in charge of every relationship in your life, and it is only what you are not giving that can be missing from any relationship in your life. If you are struggling with negativity in the workplace, dealing with difficult people, romantic relationships, or just need some communication advice, this communication podcast can help. For more, check out danoconnortraining.com

I was just delivering on-site communication training and a funny keynote in Memphis, and while I was there, I noticed that the H1N1 (or swine flu) vaccine is available everywhere. This is not, however the biggest health crisis most of us have to worry about. This is not the biggest communication challenge most of us deal with in the workplace. What we should be worrying about is swine attitude. You know, that negative, sick attitude that makes professional communicators behave more like a bunch of pigs wallowing in the mud. Our attitude is, of course, the number one thing that effects our professional communication, our personal communication, and our lives in general. Today, Dan the communication trainer, author, speaker, and energy vampire slayer, gives you a tip to help strengthen your attitudinal immune system and defend against swine attitude. For more, stop by danoconnortraining.com

It's a basic when it comes to professional communication training or professional development of any kind: How you do anything IS how you do everything. If you'd like a better career, a better relationship, a better home, or a better car, you have to start by asking yourself, "What am I doing with what I have? Am I honoring what I have and making the most of it?" Remember, the universe has eyes, and the universe is self-organizing, and it is an impossibility that you will graduate from your current situation and upgrade to a better one if you're not already making the most of what you have. For more, go to danoconnortraining.com