
Ask These 5 Questions to Bond with Your Kids
01/03/17 • 18 min
If you grew up watching family sitcoms at any point from the ‘60s through the ‘90s, then you probably expected that parenting would be filled with grand “teachable moments.”
At the end of every episode—whether it was The Brady Bunch, Growing Pains, Family Ties, or Full House—cheesy music would play, the parent would sit on the edge of the bed with a kid who’d made a hilariously big mistake, they’d have a touching moment in which the parent imparts some life-changing wisdom, and then the scene would end with a hug followed by a joke.
It turns out that real-life parenting isn’t quite like that.
In fact, many of the biggest opportunities for teachable moments with our kids are unexpected or even go by unnoticed. If only someone could cue the cheesy music and clue us in on what to do!
Well, there is something you can do to create an opportunity to connect with your children each and every day.
I call these “The Dinner Questions.” They are a way to avoid asking the question that every child on the planet finds boring: “How was school?” and getting the unhelpful answer of “fine” or “I don’t know.”
What’s special about these questions is that they do more than just entice your kids to talk about their day. They let you in on how your kids think. They help your kids learn to appreciate their experiences and the people in their lives. And they help to shape a positive mindset about the future.
In short, they create built-in “teachable moments.”
Take a listen to this short episode to hear the questions and see how.
This episode first appeared at www.drstevesilvestro.com
Music
- Akashic Records – Motivation
- Adam Hinden & cinnafinn — sea you soon
- Ampyx & Ron Curtis – Shoot for the Stars
If you grew up watching family sitcoms at any point from the ‘60s through the ‘90s, then you probably expected that parenting would be filled with grand “teachable moments.”
At the end of every episode—whether it was The Brady Bunch, Growing Pains, Family Ties, or Full House—cheesy music would play, the parent would sit on the edge of the bed with a kid who’d made a hilariously big mistake, they’d have a touching moment in which the parent imparts some life-changing wisdom, and then the scene would end with a hug followed by a joke.
It turns out that real-life parenting isn’t quite like that.
In fact, many of the biggest opportunities for teachable moments with our kids are unexpected or even go by unnoticed. If only someone could cue the cheesy music and clue us in on what to do!
Well, there is something you can do to create an opportunity to connect with your children each and every day.
I call these “The Dinner Questions.” They are a way to avoid asking the question that every child on the planet finds boring: “How was school?” and getting the unhelpful answer of “fine” or “I don’t know.”
What’s special about these questions is that they do more than just entice your kids to talk about their day. They let you in on how your kids think. They help your kids learn to appreciate their experiences and the people in their lives. And they help to shape a positive mindset about the future.
In short, they create built-in “teachable moments.”
Take a listen to this short episode to hear the questions and see how.
This episode first appeared at www.drstevesilvestro.com
Music
- Akashic Records – Motivation
- Adam Hinden & cinnafinn — sea you soon
- Ampyx & Ron Curtis – Shoot for the Stars
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Positive Strategies for ADHD - with Michelle Buzgon
ADHD has been one of the most challenging topics over the past twenty years, and is something that many, many families experience.
And while we could have long conversations about the state of ADHD in the United States—about increasing rates and whether they are due to better recognition and understanding, influence of the availability of multiple medications and treatments, changes in social expectations around the behavior of kids both at home and especially at school, or some combination of all of these things.
But without even diving into any of that, here is the reality: parents and kids all around the country are dealing with the impact of ADHD and are often struggling as they learn how to manage it.
That's what intrigues me about the work of Michelle Buzgon. Michelle is an ADHD coach with over 10 years of experience partnering with adults, kids, teens, and parents. Through individual coaching and through workshops using Cindy Goldrich’s popular, Calm & Connected program, Michelle provides something that is often the missing piece of the puzzle when it comes to treating kids with ADHD—and that’s help kids and their parents figure out lifelong strategies that tap into their strengths and help them find the focus and motivation to succeed.
So in this episode, we dive into all of this and more—with of the questions that I asked coming from parents like you who wrote to me on Facebook about their biggest ADHD challenges.
In This Interview, You Will Learn:- What’s going on with ADHD and why it isn’t about inattention, but rather a problem of attention regulation
- How using rewards and negative consequences can sometimes create more problems
- How to use the right type of consequences and when to set boundaries
- How to break the “cycle of defiance”
- How saying the same words in a different way can get a drastically better response from your child
- Tools to motivate your child
- How making the bed is a great example for teaching your child planning and executive function skills
- Tips for teachers, tips for when medication wears off in the afternoon, tips for making schooltime more successful
- And much, much more!
If you know a family that is struggling as they learn to manage ADHD, share this interview with them and others on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, Instagram, or LinkedIn, and help get this information out to everyone who needs it!
Important Resources- Michelle Buzgon can be found at www.positivefocuscoach.com
- ADDitude Magazine - four issues a year filled with tips for raising kids with ADHD
- Book: Raising Boys with ADHD: Secrets for Parenting Healthy, Happy Sons - Mary Anne Richey and James W. Forgan - tips and stories that are useful for both boys and girls
- Book: Mindful Games - by Susan Kaiser Greenland - Susan is one of my favorite experts; here, she describes dozens of activities that can be used to enhance focus and awareness
- Fidget: Set of 3 Tangle Jr. Fidget - colorful and comes with two back-ups!
- Fidget: Boinks Fidgets (Package of 6)
- Fidget: Stress Cube
Music
- Akashic Records – Motivation
- Canvai - Sunset
This post first appeared at drstevesilvestro.com/podcasts
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