107: Mothering without a Mother: Pamela’s Story

06/22/21 • 65 min

6 Listeners

Mothering without a mother — it brings on a whole new season of grief. It tests your strength and your heart. But, it can also create new relationships within your circle, new mothering figures, and, even a new relationship with yourself.

This week on the podcast, Pamela gives us a look inside her journey as she mothers without her mother. A difficult topic to say the least, but Pamela sheds light on the emotions, the grief, the cycles and the different ways she’s learned to cope.

Grief can change in different stages, different seasons, even different scenarios. Like when you find out you’re pregnant and can’t share the news with your own mom, or seeing mothers and daughters shopping together. Or when you feel robbed of these moments and memories you will never have. As Pamela mentions in this episode, it’s important to talk about all of this; it’s crucial to validate yourself and your feelings and talk about your pain. It’s not easy but it can be healing. Talking about those we love and have lost can be challenging and painful, but the more you do it, the more you feel your loved one’s presence. And, the more they still grow with us.

Tune in to hear more!

Xx, the Boob Broads

Tune in to hear more!

Xx, the Boob Broads

Previous Episode

106: Pandemic Parenting Burnout: Lauren's Story

1 Recommendations

“You’re having a normal reaction to an abnormal experience.”

This can be said for how many parents have felt during the pandemic. In this week’s episode we take a peek inside our girl Lauren’s personal experience with pandemic parenting burnout and the toll it took on her. Combined with lack of support, lack of connections and even a lack of identity, Lauren found that her nervous system was on overload, causing her to feel these things that weren’t true at all. After a vicious cycle of: overstimulation, mom rage, losing patience, apologizing to the kids more, and a culmination of events that led to Lauren feeling unlike herself, Lauren realized and reminded herself: you can do hard things.

She had never experienced anxiety before, so having to navigate that, while processing all that had transpired in such a short period of time: moving twice, a new baby, having to stop her beloved work due to the pandemic — and doing all of this with a newborn and toddler and not much room for help, Lauren found herself needing to take baby steps through the day. While she thought she was doing her best, she was actually being a perfectionist - which leads to burnouts, anxiety and panic attacks; ultimately expecting way too much of yourself. Lauren quickly changed her narrative to, “I am a good mom, I’m just having a bad day.”

And so begun Lauren’s journey into discovering healthier ways to express her emotions and to envelop herself with things that light her up - and to remove any triggering activities. Lauren shares that creating a Plan A, B, and C was life-changing. It provided a sense of control; and allowed her to move with the ebbs and flows of life with children while still taking care of herself. Additionally, she sought help from life coach Amanda (The Bountiful Mama, Episode 101). It was then that Lauren did some serious internal work, examining her needs, and most importantly, meeting her evolved self. Lauren shares that making time to find this balance and fulfill the needs she so desperately craves has been significant in her progress.

Lauren, not many people can take a trauma and discover such powerful healing within themselves - it takes work, time, and dedication. Just like you have done, and continue to do. Thank you so so much for sharing your raw, your soul, and your heart with us. We couldn’t be more proud of the woman you are, and all you continue to do to rise up, to inspire others, and to find that light in yourself.

We love you dearly.

Tune in to hear more!

Xx, the Boob Broads

Show Notes:

Episode #47: Reaching out for help: it’s an act of courage: A Conversation with a PMAD Counselor

Episode #101: The Bountiful Mama ~Chats with Mama Coach, Amanda~

The Bountiful Mama Profile

Untamed by Glennon Doyle

Next Episode

108: Naps with Multiple Kids (And how to not flip your lid!)

1 Recommendations

Naps. We’ve been down this road before, right? Sigh. This time we’re back to chat about catching some zzzz’s and Lauren and Julie are chatting all about how to manage nap time - with two kiddos!

It takes strategy, planning, low expectations, and the will to adhere to Plan C if Plans A and B fail. As we know, naps with the littles are a difficult feat. Trying to align them with another little’s nap can present even more challenges.

Listen and learn as Lauren and Julie share their experiences, tips, tricks, and quips about nap time with multiple kids!

Tune in to hear more - you are not alone, mama!

Xx, the Boob Broads