Stop Me If You Heard This...

Something about a yarmulke that just kinda scares me off when we go around with our frivolous request for a joke. But we were so pleasantly surprised by this exchange, which includes a translation that somehow makes this old third grade classic sound like a wise old adage.

Mocha and I had finally made it to the beach after hours of traffic and a lukewarm reception in the rather generic tourist towns along the way (sorry, Hamptons!). We took off our shoes and strolled along the water's edge, hand in hand, just being with each other. Mocha wasn't ready to take the relationship to the next level, however, so we started asking for jokes. This guy has a great Vince Vaughn vibe and seemed to be waiting for some dudes to come by with their camera looking for jokes, even if they were pretty gay. His kids shouting into the camera is a nice exclamation point at the end of a very solid joke, and they go on to tell their own jokes.

Ah, the children. Those little people with such big... heads.
Turns out the Hamptons sun jogged the jokemories of the children, as the under-10 crowd makes up a good portion of this expeditions take. Now we all know the appeal of the "jokes by kids" collection is not the jokes themselves, but the charm of the tellers. The false starts, the stage fright, the oh-so-cute kid-like things those kids will do. In the case of the Smile Joke below, it's the "Hey that's not a joke" element that has us all "Awwww!", whereas when adults try this I just get pissed off. I felt bad that I bullied him into a format he wasn't comfortable with ("You say 'knock-knock' and I'll say 'Who's There'")-- not sure what my problem was-- but my sense is he's gone on to a successful life anyway. Just not as a comedian.

Mocha and Vanilla’s overnight expedition! What’s summer in NYC without sitting in LIE traffic during prime beach hours, wondering why the hell you didn’t get an earlier start? The expedition starts off in the little tourist towns (lots of Izods and ice cream) en route to the waves and ends up on the beach itself, with lots of stop-n-go traffic in between. After a day collecting jokes from rich people, though, we couldn’t get a room anywhere and ended up driving back to Manhattan in the middle of the night, crashing at Mocha’s apartment, our dreams of waking up to a Long Island Sound sunrise smothered by a crappy aerobed.

Oh man, we really screwed up. In this age of Google searches, short attention spans and just way too many choices on the web, anybody with less than 7 drinks in his system is gonna keep the name of his site short, simple and to the point. Our approach? Let's think of a really long name where thewordsallruntogether and no one will remember it because there's a thousand ways to get it wrong ("what was it again, Stop Me If You Heard That One...Before?").
And hey, let's NOT put the word "joke" in the title so people won't know what the site is about until they actually GO THERE! What an intriguing MYSTERY we've created, enticing more and more people who google "jokes" to wonder what sites they're missing that aren't coming up because the word joke isn't in the title!
Sure there're nice things about the name. It's something my grandfather used to say before launching into some joke I didn't get even after hearing it about a hundred times, since he never did stop ("Two guys walking down the street. One says to the other, 'You know what time it is?' His friend shows him his watch and says 'There it is." The other guy says, "Damned if it ain't!"). And it's the name, kind of, of an old radio show where people send in jokes and win prizes if the show's panelists don't know it. That's charming! That's quaint!
But quaint never got anyone anywhere on the web, and quaint is about all we've managed to be with "Stop Me If You Heard This." Dare we change it? We own the url, TheJokeQuest.com, a much more accurate, catchy, if less quaint, name. What say? Send us your votes, suggestions, thoughts and undecipherable jokes your grandfather used to tell. We'll stay up late pouring over all the emails and letters-- Chinese food containers, the whole bit-- until at some ungodly morning hour we'll look each other knowingly and remove our glasses, rub our eyes (well, Mocha will take out his contacts anyway). We'll all start laughing because there on the table, as clear as the sky, will be the name so perfect we can only remove our glasses, rub our eyes and laugh. All over again.
In the mean time, in honor of our very long name, let us leave you with The World's Shortest Joke. (Warning: It's as bad as our name.)