My Lifelong Struggle with Tourette Syndrome

I had a conversation with my daughter yesterday that really gave me the push I needed to share this episode. I won't go into any details, but I'll just say that my daughter is 12 and she has dealt with a form of OCD that has caused her some pain. This pain has created a very special bond between father & daughter that I would never remove. We sense each other in a extra sensory sort of way. She knows when I am hurting and likewise and we each have a supernatural ability to calm each other. It's a benefit of the lifelong struggle I never thought possible when it started at 10 years old for me. She came to me with a recent struggle and instead of commiserating and allowing her to pull the victim card, I got bold with her and said "You need to get tough!" She was surprised. I went on to tell her that there are no perfect people and that God has a beautiful way of turning our greatest struggles into our greatest victories IF we allow Him to. There are tons of wonderful people with disabilities that have to work harder than we do just to get dressed and start the day, yet they recognize that they will literally have to outwork others in every area to win. They choose not to be the victim. I told her that I've struggled for 33 years, but it has made me stronger. I've had my pity parties, but for the most part, I've used my disability as fuel to win. I challenged her to change the way she thinks. "Stop coming to me with the struggle and asking how to get rid of it. Instead, embrace it and use it as fuel to turn your 'I cant's' into 'How can I's'"! She was energized after this conversation and I truly believe my 33 years of struggle lead me to that one piece of advice that will alter the trajectory of her future. I know for a fact that there are others listening to this episode struggling with the same thing. My prayer is that it gives you hope and a new resolve to embrace your disability, use it as fuel to win, and fight harder every day to achieve the God-given dreams you were put on this planet to achieve. With that, let me share my lifelong struggle with Tourette Syndrome.
I remember playing Nintendo after school with Mike in the 5th grade with this sudden insatiable desire to stretch my arms completely out. When I did it, I felt better. It was like an itch that got worse and worse that needed to be scratched. The movement of my arm scratched the itch. I was full of big ideas and creativity. I was an only child, always playing alone so creativity was my best companion. My mom was finishing her psychology degree and newly married. Many changes were happening in my life. I can remember playing ping-pong with my dad in the basement and the itches expanded to my legs. Now, I had to stretch my arms and legs constantly. These nervous tics only grew from there to nose snorting, squeezing eye blinks, licking my lips, biting the inside of my mouth, neck and head twitches, hand stretching and knuckle cracking. It happened so fast that my 10-year-old brain overloaded and my psycho-analyzing mom could not keep up!

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