Non-Monogamous Love with Justin L. Clardy

12/05/23 • 59 min

2 Listeners

Let a thousand flowers bloom! In episode 92 of Overthink, Ellie and David have a panoramic conversation on love beyond monogamy with philosophy professor, podcaster, and author of Why It's OK To Not be Monogamous, Justin L. Clardy. They envision relations of love and special attachment that aren't bound to the notion of sacrifice. They also turn to personal stories and question the role of marriage in consumer capitalism and its nonstop pressure to find the One and Only. Together, they find in non-monogamous pathways to reimagine agency, identity, and community — and a nudge toward a richer philosophy of our relations with the world around us.
Note: Ellie misspeaks when she mentions that married couples have lower satisfaction levels than unmarried ones. The correct claim, based on this study, is that they have fewer social ties. We apologize for the mistake!
Check out the episode's extended cut here!
Works Discussed
Marina Adshade, "The Origins of the Institutions of Marriage"
Simone de Beauvoir, She Came to Stay
Elizabeth Brake, Minimizing Marriage
Justin Clardy, Why It’s OK to Not Be Monogamous
Carrie Jenkins, What Love Is
Robert Nozick, "Love's Bond"
Pages The Reading Group

Related Overthink episodes
15. Marriage
16. Monogamy
17. Open Relationships
18. Polyamory

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Previous Episode

Mommy Issues

Is mom still doing your laundry!? In episode 91 of Overthink, Ellie and David explore the twisty world of mommy issues, from the OG mother Mary to today’s seducing MILFs. They look into psychonalytic theories of the mom-child bond, paying close attention to ways these theories have been challenged and expanded in the 20th century. They also discuss Simone de Beauvoir’s critique of maternal devotion by diving into some its most extreme, and problematic, manifestations. Your hosts ask: Is it true that mothers identify more easily with their children of the same gender? Do macho men and wimpy boys sexualize their mothers in similar ways? And of course: who’s the biggest mama’s boy of them all?
Check out the episode's extended cut here!

Works Discussed
Simone de Beauvoir, The Second Sex and The Ethics of Ambiguity
Nancy Chodorow, The Reproduction of Mothering
Michelle Dean, "Dee Dee Wanted Her Daughter To Be Sick, ..."
Jacques Derrida, Reflections on the Mother Tongue
Sigmund Freud, The Freud Reader
Donald Winnicott, The Good Enough Parent
Don Jon (2013)
MILF Manor (2023)

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Next Episode

Pity

Tell us who you pity and we’ll tell you who you are! In episode 93 of Overthink, Ellie and David guide you through the philosophy behind this “well-meaning” emotion. From Aristotle’s account of pity in theater, to problematic portrayals of disability in British charity telethons, pity has had an outsized role our social and cultural worlds. But who is the object of our pity, and why? Your hosts dissect various archetypes of pity, such as Father Mackenzie (a character in Eleanor Rigby by the Beatles) and the elusive Corn Man (a figure invented by Ellie while in Greece!). Where is the line between pity and compassion? How does pity interact with our social responsibilities and power structures? And, is pity a meaningful part of the good life, or is it an emotion we would all be better off without?
Check out the episode's extended cut here!

Works Discussed
Aristotle, Poetics & Rhetoric
The Beatles, Eleanor Rigby
David Hume, A Treatise of Human Nature
Kristján Kristjánsson, “Pity: A Mitigated Defense”
Martha Nussbaum, “Tragedy and Self-Sufficiency: Plato and Aristotle on Fear and Pity”
Jean-Paul Sartre, Anti-Semite and Jew
Adam Smith, The Theory of Moral Sentiments
Joseph Stramondo, “How an Ideology of Pity is a Social Harm for People With Disabilities”
Bernard Whitley, Mary Kite, and Lisa Wagner, Psychology of Prejudice and Discrimination
Special thanks to Alexandra Peabody for her support in researching this episode!