#145 Below Deck, Season 8, Ep. 13: James' Big Cannoli

This week’s Below Deck was light on content but still managed to piss us off. We’re sick of James and Elizabeth and their whole vapid “love affair.” But these two idiots deserve each other. We start with James trying to make Liz jealous by ogling all the “fit birds” on Rob’s IG. Eye roll emoji. Everyone gets antibiotics on this episode. Too bad they don’t cure stupid. Lil’ Gigi the dog poops on the poop deck (ok, it’s not actually the poop deck, but you knew that pun was coming) but we’re not mad, because she is SO DAMN CUTE. Izzy gets a well-deserved promotion, prompting the guys to give her lots of sh*t … but what did you expect? The crew spends a half day picking up trash on the beautiful island of Antigua and James is bummed because he can’t drink while doing it. Francesca and Eddie are pissed off when James and Elizabeth spend the night in the guest cabin without permission. You don’t want to see disappointed dad, kids. And when did Eddie become “dad”? Next week—Queen of Versailles!