What an aging Jewish hippie taught her kids about sex
Explicit content warning
08/10/23 • 30 min
Judaism takes a very different view of sex than much of mainstream culture in the U.S. Mischaracterization or misunderstanding of some of these differences may have evolved into some of the many anti-Semitic stereotypes (including conflicting ones...goes to show the solid reasoning behind stereotypes), but the general discourse among modern American Jews at least is, overall, pretty sex-positive. My views of sex were always a bit different, a bit more nuanced, perhaps, from my peers, so I went to the source: my mother. She’s a pretty unusual sort in her own right, and has diligently passed along some of our rule-bending values and family traditions I didn’t even know about. We’ll learn how her parents talked to her about sex in the ‘60s, her youth as a “flower child,” and how that informed her dealing with my own and my siblings' high school hijinks. Join me and my little old Jewish mother for some laughter and insight, and maybe even a fresh perspective of how sex, love, and responsibility for one another are a perfectly natural—and often wonderful—part of life.
GLOSSARY:
Kibbutznik: A resident of a kibbutz, a type of communal agricultural settlement founded in Israel at the beginning of the 20th century where members shared income, meals, housing, duties and decision-making responsibilities. Kibbutzim (the plural of kibbutz) have changed a lot since the first one was founded in 1909; there are only about 250 today with about 125,000 members, and individuals and families often have personal income and property.
John Birch Society: A far-right anti-communist group founded in 1958 by businessman Robert Welch, named after an American Baptist missionary and Army officer who was killed by the Red Army in China in 1945.
Tonsure: a hairstyle where a priest or monk’s scalp is shaved bare on top,
Other sources:
Judaism takes a very different view of sex than much of mainstream culture in the U.S. Mischaracterization or misunderstanding of some of these differences may have evolved into some of the many anti-Semitic stereotypes (including conflicting ones...goes to show the solid reasoning behind stereotypes), but the general discourse among modern American Jews at least is, overall, pretty sex-positive. My views of sex were always a bit different, a bit more nuanced, perhaps, from my peers, so I went to the source: my mother. She’s a pretty unusual sort in her own right, and has diligently passed along some of our rule-bending values and family traditions I didn’t even know about. We’ll learn how her parents talked to her about sex in the ‘60s, her youth as a “flower child,” and how that informed her dealing with my own and my siblings' high school hijinks. Join me and my little old Jewish mother for some laughter and insight, and maybe even a fresh perspective of how sex, love, and responsibility for one another are a perfectly natural—and often wonderful—part of life.
GLOSSARY:
Kibbutznik: A resident of a kibbutz, a type of communal agricultural settlement founded in Israel at the beginning of the 20th century where members shared income, meals, housing, duties and decision-making responsibilities. Kibbutzim (the plural of kibbutz) have changed a lot since the first one was founded in 1909; there are only about 250 today with about 125,000 members, and individuals and families often have personal income and property.
John Birch Society: A far-right anti-communist group founded in 1958 by businessman Robert Welch, named after an American Baptist missionary and Army officer who was killed by the Red Army in China in 1945.
Tonsure: a hairstyle where a priest or monk’s scalp is shaved bare on top,
Other sources:
Previous Episode
To be Young, Black, Gay and Jewish
How does a gay man raised in a Southern Black church end up the Executive Director of Washington DC’s LGBTQA synagogue, Bet Mishpachah? Growing up attending the African Methodist Episcopal Zion Church, Josh Maxey always had a relationship with God and religion, but after hearing his pastor talking about how gay people are destined for hell, he started pulling away from Christianity. As a religious studies minor, many routes for exploring his spirituality were available.
He found his connection to Judaism during a chance encounter with the legendary Temple Emanu-El in New York City, established in 1845, when a loving stranger invited him to sit and pray, and he found himself in tears, and at peace. Josh says that in Judaism, he found a home, where he could be 100% authentic, live his values, and follow his purpose, surrounded by diverse people and their diverse beliefs and ways of being Jewish in the world. We talk about the importance of diversifying leadership and the continual efforts needed to create a fair and equitable space, and the relationship between American Black and Jewish communities. Josh's story is more than an enlightening conversation; it is a testament to the beauty of diversity within the Jewish community and the power of authenticity in faith. Join us for a refreshing viewpoint on faith, race, and identity.
GLOSSARY:
Mishpachah: the Hebrew word for “family”.
Siddur: the Hebrew word for prayerbook, derived from the root meaning “order”, as in, the order of the words and prayers in the service.
Tikkun Olam: meaning “world repair,” is a concept that all human beings are responsible for one another and the world, and for repairing harm and damage through their actions, big or small.
Hadassah: meaning “myrtle tree” in Hebrew, it is a relatively common Jewish girl’s name and the Hebrew name of Queen Esther from the Purim story.
Kvetch: Yiddish for “complain,” meaning both to complain, and what a person who complains is called.
Halachically/halakha: Jewish law code based on the Talmud, which is the central text of Rabbic Judaism
Hebrew Israelites: Commonly called “Black Jews” until the mid-1960s, the Hebrew Israelite movement gained a following in the late 1800s and comprises people of color, primarily African Americans, “who view the biblical Israelites as their historic ancestors.” Some may not necessarily identify as Jews, and the larger group should not be confused with the “Radical Black Israelites” which the SPLC identifies as an antisemitic hate group.
More:
Temple Emanu-El is the first Reform Jewish synagogue in the United States and an architectural landmark in the Lower East Side.
Bet Misphachah, founded in 1975, is DC’s only LGBTQA synagogue. Join them for services on Fridays and the 2nd and 4th Saturdays.
The Jewish Federation of Greater Washington is a community organization that provides support for the Jewish community through social action, impact grants and other connecting and educational activities.
Next Episode
From lawyerin' to clownin', a Jew-ish journey
Robert Markowitz was a nice Jewish boy just trying to do what he thought he was supposed to, building on the legacy of his immigrant grandfather to rise to fulfill his mother’s dream of becoming a lawyer. But, like many of us who do things ultimately for others, he discovered it made him absolutely miserable.
So, he swung the pendulum all the way from being a super-serious lawyer to becoming a literal clown. He says that started a thaw that allowed him to “feel” again, and resurrected his inner child. Despite thinking he “wasn’t that Jewish," he says in the end, it was Jewish themes that interest him, like redemption, or “teshuva,” which means to “return.” His own journey of teshuva allowed Robert to rediscover how to seek and spread joy. He became a children’s musician and then a writer, and has a novel about a lawyer who left lawyering to save his soul, called...."Clown Shoes” of course. What else?
Glossary:
Shyster: often defined simply as meaning an unscrupulous scam artist or unprofessional lawyer, the term is generally used as–and therefore has taken on the meaning of–an antisemitic slur or coded reference to the stereotype of the “greedy Jew.” It’s often also associated with Shakespeare’s deeply anti-Semitic character of Shylock.
Teshuva: Literally meaning “return”, it is often used to mean “redemption” or “repentance,” in the sense of “returning” to the goodness or Godliness innate to us all.
Ner Tamid: Meaning “eternal light,” it is a literal light that is kept lit at all times in front of the ark, where Torah scrolls are kept, and is also a symbol of the eternal presence of God.
Shtetl: Yiddish for “little town,” the term refers to Ashkenazi Jewish enclaves primarily in Russia and Poland, and in fact housed many Gentiles as well as Jews. They were market towns with synagogues, churches and merchants, and were ultimately destroyed when the Holocaust wiped out most of Eastern European Jewry.
More on the Jewish lawyer trope and other “positive stereotypes”:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vVO6lErmy84&ab_channel=KatzCenterforAdvancedJudaicStudies
https://jeffreykass.medium.com/jews-are-the-best-lawyers-50d33738249e
https://www.heyalma.com/rapping-jewish-lawyers-history/
https://www.jta.org/2019/02/19/ideas/an-idiots-guide-to-anti-semitic-tropes-2
More on the term “antisemitic” and “anti-Semitic”:
https://www.adl.org/spelling-antisemitism-vs-anti-semitism
https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/anti-semitism-or-antisemitism
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