
Day 19 - The Very Definition of Fuck Around and Find Out...
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07/30/24 • 10 min
1 Listener
Hey, Hi, Hello, this is the History Wizard and welcome back for Day 19 of Have a Day w/ The History Wizard. Thank you to everyone who tuned in for Day 18 last week, and especially thank you to everyone who rated and/or reviewed the podcast. I hope you all learned something last week and I hope the same for this week as well. Originally this week was going to cover the currently ongoing genocide in Ukraine, but I need to do some more research before I’m ready to record that episode so instead today’s episode is going to be an interlude and we’re going to be talking aboutone of my favorite women in history. Olga of Kiev, a woman who is the very definition of fuck around and find out.
But first! The Alchemist’s Table! Today’s libation is called Kissed by Summer. It’s 2 oz of bourbon, 1 oz each of amaretto and francelico. .75 oz of vanilla simple syrup, 3 dashes of angostura bitters. Shake well and pour over ice. Top with equal parts lemonade and ginger beer and enjoy!
So, now onto Ola of Kiev, the Saint of Slaughter. Olga’s exact year of birth is unknown, but we know she was born somewhere between 890 and 925 CE in Pleskov. She was of Varangian origin, which was an ethnic group descended from Swedish vikingr invaders that eventually settled in the area of the Kievan Rus. She was 15 years old when she was married to Prince Igor I of the Rurik Dynasty. Igor was the son of Rurik, making him only the second ruler of this particular dynasty. During Igor’s reign and owing to a great deal of military aid from his guardian Oleg the Wise the Kievan Rus, and the many tribes of people living in it all came under Rurik control.
Tragedy would strike the Rurik Dynasty in the form of a neighboring tribe known as the Drevelians, a tribe of Eastern Slavic peoples. The Drevelians were not part of the Kievan Rus, though they had joined them in military campaigns against the Byzantine Empire previously and paid a yearly tribute to Igor’s predecessors in the Rurik Dynasty. After Oleg the Wise died in 912 CE the Drevelians stopped paying their tribute to Igor, instead paying it to a local warlord.
In 945 CE Igor set out with his army to bring the Drevelians into line. No longer would he allow them to deny him what he saw as his rightful tribute. He marched his army to the traditional Drevelian capital, Iskorosten, today known as Korosten in the Zhytomyr Oblast in northern Ukraine. Now, Igor’s army was much larger than any the Drevelians could field, so they backed down and agreed to resume their payments to Igor. However, Igor became greedy and after leaving to return home he turned around and went back to Iskorosten to demand even MORE tribute, at which point he Drevelians captured him alone and killed him.
According to the Byzantine chronicler Leo the Deacon, Igor's death was caused by a gruesome act of torture in which he was "captured by them, tied to tree trunks, and torn in two." They allegedly tied one leg each to two bent over birch trees and then let them catapult up in opposing directions, tearing him in half. Though it is possible that this exact story is apocryphal, the fact that Igor was killed by the Drevelians cannot be denied.
Upon learning of the death of her husband Olga ascended to the throne to rule as regent in the name of her son Sviatoslav. Olga was the first woman to rule over the Kievan Rus. Now, there isn’t a great deal of information in the historical record regarding what Olga’s reign was like. But there is A LOT of information detailing the bloody revenge she got on those who stole her love from her.
The Drevelians, now firmly in the Fuck Around stage and emboldened by their successful murder of Igor sent a missive to Olga. They proposed that Olga should marry the Drevelian prince Mal. The man directly responsible for killing her husband. According to the Russian Primary Chronicle, a document formerly thought to have been written by Nestor the Chronicler, although now it is considered to be of unknown authorship, Olga responded to their bold pronouncement thusly:
“Your proposal is pleasing to me, indeed, my husband cannot rise again from the dead. But I desire to honor you tomorrow in the presence of my people. Return now to your boat, and remain there with an aspect of arrogance. I shall send for you on the morrow, and you shall say, "We will not ride on horses nor go on foot, carry us in our boat." And you shall be carried in your boat.”
When they returned the next day the Drevelians repeated the words Olga had bade them and the people of the Kievan Rus lifted their boat upon their shoulders and carried them into the courtyard of Olga’s castle. The Drevelians were thrilled by this, feeling as though they were carried in great honor upon a palanquin. Once they were brought into the courtyard their porters dropped them, boat and all, into a trench that Olga had ordered dug the day before and were buried alive. It is written that Olg...
Hey, Hi, Hello, this is the History Wizard and welcome back for Day 19 of Have a Day w/ The History Wizard. Thank you to everyone who tuned in for Day 18 last week, and especially thank you to everyone who rated and/or reviewed the podcast. I hope you all learned something last week and I hope the same for this week as well. Originally this week was going to cover the currently ongoing genocide in Ukraine, but I need to do some more research before I’m ready to record that episode so instead today’s episode is going to be an interlude and we’re going to be talking aboutone of my favorite women in history. Olga of Kiev, a woman who is the very definition of fuck around and find out.
But first! The Alchemist’s Table! Today’s libation is called Kissed by Summer. It’s 2 oz of bourbon, 1 oz each of amaretto and francelico. .75 oz of vanilla simple syrup, 3 dashes of angostura bitters. Shake well and pour over ice. Top with equal parts lemonade and ginger beer and enjoy!
So, now onto Ola of Kiev, the Saint of Slaughter. Olga’s exact year of birth is unknown, but we know she was born somewhere between 890 and 925 CE in Pleskov. She was of Varangian origin, which was an ethnic group descended from Swedish vikingr invaders that eventually settled in the area of the Kievan Rus. She was 15 years old when she was married to Prince Igor I of the Rurik Dynasty. Igor was the son of Rurik, making him only the second ruler of this particular dynasty. During Igor’s reign and owing to a great deal of military aid from his guardian Oleg the Wise the Kievan Rus, and the many tribes of people living in it all came under Rurik control.
Tragedy would strike the Rurik Dynasty in the form of a neighboring tribe known as the Drevelians, a tribe of Eastern Slavic peoples. The Drevelians were not part of the Kievan Rus, though they had joined them in military campaigns against the Byzantine Empire previously and paid a yearly tribute to Igor’s predecessors in the Rurik Dynasty. After Oleg the Wise died in 912 CE the Drevelians stopped paying their tribute to Igor, instead paying it to a local warlord.
In 945 CE Igor set out with his army to bring the Drevelians into line. No longer would he allow them to deny him what he saw as his rightful tribute. He marched his army to the traditional Drevelian capital, Iskorosten, today known as Korosten in the Zhytomyr Oblast in northern Ukraine. Now, Igor’s army was much larger than any the Drevelians could field, so they backed down and agreed to resume their payments to Igor. However, Igor became greedy and after leaving to return home he turned around and went back to Iskorosten to demand even MORE tribute, at which point he Drevelians captured him alone and killed him.
According to the Byzantine chronicler Leo the Deacon, Igor's death was caused by a gruesome act of torture in which he was "captured by them, tied to tree trunks, and torn in two." They allegedly tied one leg each to two bent over birch trees and then let them catapult up in opposing directions, tearing him in half. Though it is possible that this exact story is apocryphal, the fact that Igor was killed by the Drevelians cannot be denied.
Upon learning of the death of her husband Olga ascended to the throne to rule as regent in the name of her son Sviatoslav. Olga was the first woman to rule over the Kievan Rus. Now, there isn’t a great deal of information in the historical record regarding what Olga’s reign was like. But there is A LOT of information detailing the bloody revenge she got on those who stole her love from her.
The Drevelians, now firmly in the Fuck Around stage and emboldened by their successful murder of Igor sent a missive to Olga. They proposed that Olga should marry the Drevelian prince Mal. The man directly responsible for killing her husband. According to the Russian Primary Chronicle, a document formerly thought to have been written by Nestor the Chronicler, although now it is considered to be of unknown authorship, Olga responded to their bold pronouncement thusly:
“Your proposal is pleasing to me, indeed, my husband cannot rise again from the dead. But I desire to honor you tomorrow in the presence of my people. Return now to your boat, and remain there with an aspect of arrogance. I shall send for you on the morrow, and you shall say, "We will not ride on horses nor go on foot, carry us in our boat." And you shall be carried in your boat.”
When they returned the next day the Drevelians repeated the words Olga had bade them and the people of the Kievan Rus lifted their boat upon their shoulders and carried them into the courtyard of Olga’s castle. The Drevelians were thrilled by this, feeling as though they were carried in great honor upon a palanquin. Once they were brought into the courtyard their porters dropped them, boat and all, into a trench that Olga had ordered dug the day before and were buried alive. It is written that Olg...
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Day 18 - Rubber Doesn't Always Bounce Back...
Hey, Hi, Hello, this is the History Wizard and welcome back for Day 18 of Have a Day w/ The History Wizard. Thank you to everyone who tuned in for Day 17 2 weeks ago, and especially thank you to everyone who rated and/or reviewed the podcast. I hope you all learned something last week and I hope the same for this week as well. This week we’re going to be diving back into learning about historic genocides as we learn about the Congolese genocide committed by King Leopold II of Belgium. We’ve talked about the Congolese Genocide previously on Day 11, Free Congo. But for today’s episode we’re going to go into much greater detail about this particular genocide and not just discuss it within the context of a current conflict.
Now, before we get to The Alchemist’s Table I wanted to apologize that there wasn’t a new episode last week. Sometimes you just don’t have the energy, the motivation, the spoons or the spell slots. So, I took a week off. It might happen again. And now on to the booze! Today’s libation is called Cherries Jubilee. It’s 2 oz of Islay scotch. I'd recommend a Bowmore if you’re not a huge fan of the peat. Then 1 oz of creme de cacao. 1 oz of frangelico. Add .75 oz of cherry syrup. Shake and pour overice. Top with ginger beer or a hard cider. Garnish with luxardo cherries and enjoy.
Now, with that out of the way let’s get into the Congolese Rubber Genocide.
In order to understand this genocide we first need to understand European colonialism during this time. Colonialism has taken many forms over the years and in the end of the 19th and beginning of the 20th century it transitioned from the classic form of American colonialism into what we would consider New Colonialism. New Colonialism would rely less on direct military control of an area and would rely more on having governmental institutions in power that would directly benefit those pre existing colonial power structures.
So, near the end of the 19th century there was very little European colonial and mercantile presence in Africa. There were some port towns, to be sure, and there was trade, but very little of the African continent was under the control of European powers at this time. But, European greed for gold and, especially, ivory wouldn’t allow them to ignore African riches for much longer. The Berlin Conference was organized between November 1884 and February 1885 at the request of King Leopold II of Belgium and was organized by Otto von Bismarck of Germany.
The primary purpose of the Berlin Conference was regulating European colonization and trade during the New Imperialism period. It might seem strange to need to differentiate New Imperialism from the forms of empire building that came before. Afterall, the methodology was largely the same. Conquest. And the reasoning was, mostly the same. Resources and land acquisition. But New Imperialism also came with a good deal of “civilizing” flavor. You might be familiar with the poem White Man’s Burden by Rudyard Kipling. If you’re not. You can fully understand the entire mindset of 19th and 20th century colonialism simply by reading that poem.
Now, Leopold had been using the explorations of Henry Morgan Stanley, and his own organization, the International African Association to quietly try and create his own private colony in central Africa that would be called the Congo Free State, but France found out and started making moves, and then Britain and Portugal found out and began trying to grab land which led Germany to do the same. War was brewing quickly as these various European powerhouses all sought as much land, wealth, and power as they could grab. This, ultimately, would be why the Berlin Conference was called and why it was so successful. These European powers decided, instead of going to war and killing each other over Africa they’d just all meet and carve it up like a pecan pie and settle it all peaceful like.
There were 14 nations/empires in attendance at the Berlin Conference, Germany, Austria Hungary, the International Congo Society (this really means King Leopold II of Belgium), Spain, Denmark, the United States, France, the United Kingdom, Italy, the Netherlands, Portugal, Russia, Sweden-Norway, and the Ottoman Empire. And while all 14 of those countries were in attendance at the Berlin Conference and had a say in the final decisions that were made, only 7 countries were actually going to colonize Africa once it was over.
Those countries were Belgium (really just King Leopold II, this would be his own private colony), Germany, Spain, France, Great Britain, Portugal, and Italy. At the time of the Berlin Conference, in 1885, less than 10% of the African continent was under European control, but by the time World War 1 broke out only Liberia and Ethiopia were still independent. Although, Liberia certainly only existed because of US colonial power, and so doesn’t REALLY count as independent.
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