The Difference a Dad Makes Ep. 3 - Building Confidence in Children

03/18/25 • 24 min

In this episode of The Difference a Dad Makes, hosts Brian Mattson and Dr. Jennifer L. Baker welcome Paul Baker, an experienced educator and former school principal, to discuss practical ways to build confidence in children.

Paul shares insights from his career in education and his experiences as a father, offering real-life examples of how responsibility, chores and perseverance help instill confidence in kids. The conversation explores the value of allowing children to experience challenges, learn from failures and develop independence through everyday tasks.

Whether you're a parent looking for strategies to encourage self-reliance or just hoping to understand how confidence is built over time, this episode provides meaningful stories, practical advice and engaging discussions on the importance of resilience in childhood.

Episode Highlights

[01:49] "I think you have to let them experience things. You have to require things of them. Jennifer and I were always very big on chores and it was a battle, but we stood together."

[04:52] "We felt that it was good for children to sweat, to do something boring because there are a lot of things in life that are not fun but have to be done."

[08:11] "We let our kids cook. There were some disasters but learning happens in those mistakes."

[14:09] "The first time Jack buttoned his shirt by himself, he cried, Jessica cried and I cried. He worked hard for it and that was such a proud moment."

[15:39] "There are winners and losers in competition. Not everything ends in a tie and not everybody gets a trophy. Understanding that is part of growing up."

[22:07] "It's better to crash and burn in fourth grade than to wait until you're 18 and realize you're not the best at everything."

Resources

📩 Sign up for the Good Dads Newsletter and never miss a podcast!

🌐 Learn more at gooddads.com

📧 Questions or comments? Reach out to Good Dads at [email protected]

Episode Highlights

[01:49] "I think you have to let them experience things. You have to require things of them. Jennifer and I were always very big on chores and it was a battle, but we stood together."

[04:52] "We felt that it was good for children to sweat, to do something boring because there are a lot of things in life that are not fun but have to be done."

[08:11] "We let our kids cook. There were some disasters but learning happens in those mistakes."

[14:09] "The first time Jack buttoned his shirt by himself, he cried, Jessica cried and I cried. He worked hard for it and that was such a proud moment."

[15:39] "There are winners and losers in competition. Not everything ends in a tie and not everybody gets a trophy. Understanding that is part of growing up."

[22:07] "It's better to crash and burn in fourth grade than to wait until you're 18 and realize you're not the best at everything."

Resources

📩 Sign up for the Good Dads Newsletter and never miss a podcast!

🌐 Learn more at gooddads.com

📧 Questions or comments? Reach out to Good Dads at [email protected]

Previous Episode

The Intentional Dad Ep. 3 - Teaching Empathy and Resilience

In this episode of The Intentional Dad, hosts Jason Hynson and J. Fotsch sit down with Herb Cody, a dedicated father from Nixa, Missouri, to discuss how life’s challenges shape empathy, resilience and intentional fatherhood.

Herb shares his personal journey of navigating fatherhood through life-altering experiences, including his own near-fatal accident and his wife’s traumatic brain injury. He explains how he balanced being both a father and caretaker, how his community stepped in to support his family and how he instilled resilience and compassion in his children.

This episode is a powerful look at overcoming adversity, staying present as a dad and fostering emotional strength in your children.

Episode Highlights

[02:39] "I had to be mom and dad while taking care of my wife’s recovery. I don’t even remember how I did it—I just knew I had to."

[05:36] "The community really stepped in. Other parents, friends, even teammates’ families—it reminded me that none of us have to do this alone."

[07:06] "You never know what someone else is going through. Be there for them. Stand up when you see someone struggling."

[10:59] "You can’t plan for life-changing moments. You just have to be there, show up, and figure it out one step at a time."

[12:14] "We called it ‘Herb-achi Night’—just a fun way to bring laughter into our home when times were hard."

[16:04] "I didn’t know what to say or do, but I was there. And sometimes, that’s enough."

Resources

📩 Sign up for the Good Dads Newsletter and never miss a podcast!

🌐 Learn more at gooddads.com

📧 Questions or comments? Reach out to Good Dads at [email protected]

Next Episode

Hot Topics Ep. 3 - Letting Your Children Fail: Using Setbacks to Foster Growth & Resilience

In this episode of Hot Topics, hosts Will Cox and Dr. Jennifer L. Baker discuss the importance of allowing children to experience failure as a tool for growth. They explore how overcoming setbacks builds resilience, decision-making skills and long-term success.

Will shares a personal story about his son procrastinating on a school assignment and his initial instinct to step in and "fix" the situation. Dr. Baker provides insights on why failure is a crucial learning experience and how parents can balance support with accountability. They also discuss how financial literacy, responsibility and discipline are best taught through firsthand experience.

This episode is a must-listen for parents struggling with when to intervene and when to step back helping their children become strong independent individuals.

Episode Highlights

[00:46] "Allowing them to fail is more difficult than teaching them to succeed."

[02:46] "I stopped and thought—oh my gosh, I'm allowing my child to commit plagiarism. Why am I doing this?"

[05:12] "I had to pay for the repairs of my car when I was 16 years old. That changed how I saw responsibility."

[11:08] "Give them the chance to fail when the price tag is small."

[14:48] "My husband said, ‘Wow, they got places that can do that. You should call and figure it out.’ So my son had to solve the problem himself."

[16:33] "Years later, my son knew how to handle a snowstorm because he had to learn the hard way before."

[22:24] "Children can adjust to different rules in different households—just like they do at school."

[24:17] "Michael Jordan, Abraham Lincoln, Winston Churchill—what motivated them? Failure."

[25:40] "You're not always going to be there. Let them make mistakes now while it's safe, before they enter the real world."

Resources

📩 Sign up for the Good Dads Newsletter and never miss a podcast! 🌐 Learn more at gooddads.com 📧 Questions or comments? Reach out to Good Dads at [email protected]