Forgotten Failures

When you defund schools, you end up with the Angel Grove high school play, featuring the school’s largest student as Rumpelstiltskin, and students forced to bring in their grandmothers’ antique spinning wheels as props. Kimberly’s grandmother’s antique spinning wheel gets destroyed, and then Kimberly’s grandmother’s antique spinning wheel disappeared, and nobody seems to understand why she’s upset. Meanwhile the Zords are only getting bigger as the Ultrazord, Titanus and the Hooptiezord all get involved in the battle against a certain wheel (not Kimberly’s grandmother’s antique spinning wheel, another one).

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Jason. Tommy. If you want to win the inane spectacle of confusion that is the Team Ninja Finals, you’re going to need some Gung Ho. You’re going to need to learn how to Gung Ho. Rita and Finster and the Putties have mastered Gung Ho and thus created Super Putties! They are putties, but with bigger hands. When Zack hacks their limbs off with an axe, they form back together! Now that’s Gung Ho.

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Trancers has so much great stuff. Time travel, Honda Elite scooters, Helen Hunt’s elf outfit, the punk version of Jingle Bells, Police Chief McNulty. But we just think something’s missing. And that thing is... one-liners. It looks like a Troma movie but the script is like a TV movie. And what is so bad about the trancers anyway? They are just normal people until Jack Deth comes in and ruins everything. Our most important discovery: Trancers is on Hulu with optional commentary from Elvira. And what a commentary it is. Trancers!

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It’s time for the Angel Grove High School Masquerade. Everyone’s in the costume you would expect, except Alpha 5 who is attracting ALL the ladies in his Alpha 5 costume. Rita and Finster spend most of this episode getting the Putties to assemble a giant flying meatball. Meanwhile, Lindsay, Mike, Mike, and Darrill discuss Zack’s sad love life and Robin Hood: Men In Tights. Oh, and today’s monster is... Frankenstein. The Pudgy Pig, the Spit Flower, the Gnarly Gnome, and... Frankenstein. Somehow he doesn’t fit in.

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It’s all about brains over brawn in this episode. Apparently the Power Rangers represent “brains” and Bulk and the Putties are “brawn”. Meanwhile Jason takes his nephew to the beach, introduces him to “the famous bully, Bulk” and they accidentally defeat Scorpina with a mirror. And Tommy isn’t in this one for some reason. And The Rockstar (seen below) is not introduced, he just shows up. It’s all a big mess.

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