Unsubscribing From Your Thoughts

08/08/23 • 10 min

The power of the human mind is a double-edged sword. It enables us to plan, solve problems, create goals and work towards them, but its dark side tends to haunt our inner world with self-criticism, ruminations and worries. For many of us, that voice inside can become our own worst enemy, crushing our self-esteem and fuelling constant stress, negativity or anxiety. Thankfully, we don’t have to get caught up in distressing or harmful inner dialogue. We can choose to unsubscribe.

In this episode of Mentally Stronger, I explain how cognitive fusion causes us to mistake our thoughts for reality, giving them the power to dictate our actions and emotions. I share an ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) strategy that disempowers unhelpful and painful thoughts and, with regular practice, builds your capacity to unhook from them and bring more lightness, ease and joy into your days.

Key Links:

Melli O’Brien: https://melliobrien.com

The Mental Strength School: https://melliobrien.com/mental-strength-school/

Join the waitlist for Headstrong, Melli's 8-week online training course: https://melliobrien.com/headstrong-program/

Key Links:

Melli O’Brien: https://melliobrien.com

The Mental Strength School: https://melliobrien.com/mental-strength-school/

Join the waitlist for Headstrong, Melli's 8-week online training course: https://melliobrien.com/headstrong-program/

Previous Episode

Seek First To Understand, Then To Be Understood

We all have a natural yearning to be understood, but effective communication requires mutual understanding. In our efforts to convey our point of view or form the perfect response, we often miss the opportunity to see another perspective, and create a defensive environment that is ripe for misunderstandings, distrust and resentments. Steven Covey offers a valuable remedy in The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People - “seek first to understand, then to be understood" - but this can be harder than it sounds.

In this episode of Mentally Stronger, I break down Covey’s advice and demonstrate practical steps to promote more mindful, non-judgemental and deep listening. When we truly hear and seek to understand others, we set up the conditions for mutual trust, care and respect, making it more likely that, when it's our turn to speak, we’ll be afforded the same courtesy.

Key Links:

Melli O’Brien: https://melliobrien.com

The Mental Strength School: https://melliobrien.com/mental-strength-school/

Join the waitlist for Headstrong, Melli's 8-week online training course: https://melliobrien.com/headstrong-program/

Next Episode

How to Tame Your Inner Critic

Living with someone who is constantly criticising, berating, and judging you is exhausting, demoralising and breeds a sense of tension and uneasiness within the home. The same can be said for what might be called our true home, the one we carry with us everywhere: our mind. Many of us endure constant feelings of unworthiness, stress and inner struggle fueled by a harsh inner critic, i.e., the worst roommate ever, a permanent tenant on a lease we never signed. We can’t kick them out. We can’t move out. So what do we do?

In this episode of Mentally Stronger, I invite you to shift your inner dialogue and transform your inner critic into the kind and supportive roommate you deserve, returning your home to a place of safety, relaxation and rejuvenation. Through persistent training in self-compassion and a focus on befriending instead of berating yourself, you’ll discover greater ease, calm, motivation and vitality.

Key Links:

The Mental Strength School: https://melliobrien.com/mental-strength-school/

Podcast: The Link Between Compassion and Success

Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/mentally-stronger/id1637748876?i=1000617629337

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/2ZouAxNZHUmC4bbhb0PMvn?si=ZPTyVpigQH670keKumKtPg

Melli O’Brien: https://melliobrien.com

Join the waitlist for Headstrong, Melli's 8-week online training course: https://melliobrien.com/headstrong-program/