357: GirlTalk: What does it mean to “claim” her (and why does she love it)?

04/18/25 • 71 min

1 Listener

Dear Men: How to Rock Sex, Dating, and Relationships With Women

Want to generate sexual heat, and also inspire safety and a sense of belonging in your partner? Learn how to claim her!

We've talked about claiming before on the podcast, especially with respect to building polarity. When a man is on the more passive side, it can feel lackluster and also confusing. As one woman put it, "Do you even want me?" This throws off polarity.

When he knows how to take inspired action and lead by claiming us, we want to see him more! We feel the polarity. And because of that we feel more relaxed, uplifted, and yes, you guessed it: turned on!

Here we delve more into what it means to us to feel claimed in sex, dating, and relationships -- and why we adore it.

Work with us

Want to go deeper than the podcast? Jason and I are ready to work with you! We specialize in helping men break old patterns and transform their sex & love lives for good. If you're looking for high-quality relationship advice, we've got it.

To see if there's a fit for our flagship program Pillars of Presence, book a call here. Start anytime. (https://evolutionary.men/apply/)

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Memorable quotes from the episode:

"Claiming is NOT controlling."
"I felt like ‘no’ was not an acceptable answer."
"You get the Friday 4pm text: ‘What are you up to tonight?’"
“He came towards me with a smile.”
“That was really great. I would love to take you to dinner sometime next week. When are you free?”
“I want you next to me. I don’t want to sleep alone tonight.”
“This is in service of our relationship and our love and our connection.”
“You don’t have to carry the burden for every asshole.”
“The experiences you want to have with women are just a claim away!”

Want to generate sexual heat, and also inspire safety and a sense of belonging in your partner? Learn how to claim her!

Here we delve more into what it means to us to feel claimed in sex, dating, and relationships -- and why we adore it.

Work with us

To see if there's a fit for our flagship program Pillars of Presence, book a call here. Start anytime. (https://evolutionary.men/apply/)

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Memorable quotes from the episode:

"Claiming is NOT controlling."
"I felt like ‘no’ was not an acceptable answer."
"You get the Friday 4pm text: ‘What are you up to tonight?’"
“He came towards me with a smile.”
“That was really great. I would love to take you to dinner sometime next week. When are you free?”
“I want you next to me. I don’t want to sleep alone tonight.”
“This is in service of our relationship and our love and our connection.”
“You don’t have to carry the burden for every asshole.”
“The experiences you want to have with women are just a claim away!”

Previous Episode

356: What does it really mean to 'be a man' -- and a warrior? (ft. Wayne Forrest)

When Wayne Forrest was 25 years old, he was a strong, rugby-playing farmer who was married with two twin babies.

Then he had an accident on the rugby field and broke his neck. A doctor said he would never walk again. His wife wouldn't touch him anymore. And he thought, "How the hell am I going to survive this?"

What follows is his story, which touches on everything from love, sex, and dating, to dependence, interdependence, and the power of the human spirit. As Wayne puts it, the Inner Warrior is the most important element of our lives, yet we rarely have a strong relationship with it.

What does it mean to be a modern warrior? How to we re-envision manhood, masculinity, and power? I believe the answers lie in discussions like these.

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Work with us

To see if there's a fit for our flagship program Pillars of Presence, book a call here. Start anytime. (https://evolutionary.men/apply/)

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Memorable quotes from this episode:

“I put myself in danger to prove that I was enough (or good enough).”
“Having to rely on everybody ... was quite an extreme moment.”
“We’ve got a deeper intelligence that’s connected to everything.”
“It’s funny how you make a decision and the universe puts the right people in front of you.”
“She started throwing mud at me in the yard and I thought, ‘Ahhh, I’ve got her!’”
“Be curious and question every belief you have.”
"It takes a load off!"

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Mentioned on this episode:

Wayne's site, and to book a call: https://www.wayneforrest.com/your-inner-warrior-strategy-call

Next Episode

358: Do you trust men? (ft. Jason Lange)

When I ask my male friends, "Do you trust men?" most of them say, pretty unequivocally, "No."

Why does this matter?

A lot of our clients come to us because they want to improve their dynamics with women. Whether they're single and dating or partnered and seeking more sex, intimacy, closeness, or harmony with their woman, there's a lot of focus on women.

So what does a man's relationship to men have to do with it? Why does it matter to know whether you trust men, if you're working on healthy relationships and sex with women?

For one, as Jason puts it: "As a man, if you have never experienced healthy masculine energy on the outside, it is almost certain you will have a hard time trusting it inside yourself, too."

And if you don't trust your own inner masculine, it will be very challenging for you to generate sexual polarity, set boundaries, or go after the things you want (including women and intimacy).

The thing is, most men don't trust men because a lot of men aren't trust-able! Millions of boys and young men are bullied, for example. Whether by a parent, sibling, or classmate, a large percentage of men experience bullying as children, teenagers, or adults.

As the medical director for the LA Department of Children and Family Services puts it, "A bully gains power in a relationship by reducing another’s, and shows little regard for the consequences to a victim’s health or well-being."

Fortunately you can reclaim your relationship to the healthy masculine, and this will directly impact you having a healthy relationship with yourself as well as women in your life.

Whether you're single looking for dating advice, married looking for relationship advice, or somewhere in between, this is a vital -- and often under-explored -- topic.

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Quotes from this episode:

"Many men have been the recipient of masculine dysregulation."
"One of the big crises for men is lack of role models."
"The patriarchy is extremely damaging to men."
"It’s a step a lot of guys want to skip."
"The sense is on-guard vigilance."
"All I have to do is be here."
"Men can become my allies."
"Masculinity is a transmission, and without witnessing the healthy, deep versions of it is essential."
"The power of groups is healing peer relationships."

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