Calm the Chaos

On a recent trip to Scotland, I ate well, I drank well -- didn’t so much sleep well. But I enjoyed just the right amount of indulgence for me on a trip.

This kind of happiness is hedonia. Hedonic pleasure is about, well, pleasure. Comfort. Satisfaction. What feels good in the moment. Pleasure coming from external things. A massage after a long day. A bite of flourless chocolate cake. Sprawling out on your beach towel and doing nothing.

These pleasures are fun and worthwhile and should be savored in the moment. Hedonic pleasures are also temporary.

You may have heard of the hedonic treadmill. This is the idea that we chase hedonic pleasures, we get them, and then that becomes our new baseline.

You get the promotion you want, but that’s no longer enough money. You want more. You move into a ‘starter’ home that you love, but one month in you’re wishing you’re already in your ‘forever’ home, one that will be much bigger and perfect and you’ll finally be satisfied then. This kind of happiness is tied to external pleasure. Moving toward pleasure and away from pain.

There are two ways we can extend hedonic happiness: 1) by expressing gratitude for and savoring these moments and 2) by abstaining from these pleasures for awhile. Absence makes the heart grow fonder and reminds you to appreciate what you have.

There’s a second kind of happiness that’s long lasting: eudaimonia. We achieve this by living as our highest selves. By being people of good character and being good to ourselves. This includes being disciplined enough to do what's best for us and those around us.
Enjoy this episode on how to learn to love doing the hard thing through Stoic discipline.
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you ? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?

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