Nia Garcia: To Me... That Is Not A Mom

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04/02/22 • 78 min

Jayne Amelia talks with Nia Garcia. The smart and lovely Nia Garcia is a former foster youth who was abused by her drug addicted mother and stepfather who then threw out of her family home when she was only 13... she ended up living in shelters after several foster homes, then on the streets. She self-harmed for many years and then got addicted to meth to try to numb her pain, but with a lot of hard work and determination she’s now recovered and has made herself a new and happy life. She’s learned how to protect herself and really take care of herself, and now she takes care of her brothers too.
iFoster: Helping Kids In Foster Care Reach Their Full Potential
Child Protective Services
Child Welfare Information Gateway to report abuse
Nia Garcia: Is today the day? And if not today-when? "It's my experience that people are a lot more sympathetic if they can see you hurting, and for the millionth time in life I wish for measles or smallpox or some other easily understood disease just to make it easier on me and also on them. Sometimes there’s beauty in the tough words- it's all how you read them. We are all alone, trapped in these bodies and our own minds, and whatever company we have in this life is only fleeting and superficial. I know myself well enough to know that no one else can keep you awake or keep you from sleeping. I do my best thinking at night when everyone else is sleeping. No interruptions. No noise. I like the feeling of being awake when no one else is. Stars in the sky, stars on the ground. It's hard to tell where the sky ends and the earth begins. I feel the need to say something grand and poetic, but the only thing I come up with is “it's lovely.” Sorry is a waste time. You have to live your life like you’ll never be sorry. It’s easier just to do the right thing from the start so there’s nothing to apologize for. You deserve better. I can’t promise you I’ll stay around, not because I don’t want to. It’s hard to explain. I’m a fuckup. I’m broken, no one can fix it. I’ve tried. I’m still trying. I can’t love anyone because it’s not fair to anyone who loves me back. I’ll never hurt you, not like I want to hurt her. But I can’t promise you I won’t pick you apart, piece by piece, until you’re in a thousand pieces, just like me. You should know what you’re getting into before getting involved. Listen, I’m a freak. I’m a weirdo. I’m the troublemaker. I start fights. I let people down. Don’t make Nia mad, whatever you do. Oh, there she goes again, in one of her moods. Moody Nia. Angry Nia. Unpredictable Nia. Crazy Nia. But I’m not a complication of symptoms. Not a casualty of shitty parents and an even shittier chemical makeup. Not a problem. Not a diagnosis. Not an illness. Not something to be rescued. I’m a person. But I bring it up to let you know that this is the way I feel right now. Like Pluto and Jupiter are aligned with the earth and I’m floating. The future is uncertain, but that can be a good thing. I have this feeling, like I’m waiting for something. But I have no idea what. The thing is, there are good days and bad days. I feel most guilty saying they aren’t all bad. It’s okay to laugh, you know. The earth’s not going to split open. You’re not going to hell. Believe me. If there is a hell, I’ll be ther

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Debbie Dullabaun: I Stayed WIth Him, And It Was The Best Thing Ever

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Jayne Amelia speaks with CASA Debbie Dullabaun who has been of service to her community for close to 30 years.

In 1998 after the death of her six year old son, Dale Lee Dullabaun III, Debbie began to work in his memory with several non-profit organizations. Along with volunteering for many years with the American Red Cross and the San Fernando Valley Domestic Abuse Response Team (DART), in 2020 Debbie became a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) volunteer representing the needs of youth in the Los Angeles child welfare system. Debbie has also been active in the Compassionate Friends grief support organization, serving as the founding chair of its Diversity Commission, and as a member and president of TCF's Board of Directors. She is also a volunteer grief counselor with Our House, which provides grief support services in the Los Angeles area.
Domestic Abuse Response Team (DART)
Compassionate Friends
Our House
"No matter how big and powerful government gets, and the many services it provides, it can never take the place of volunteers." - Ronald Reagan

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Gay Courter: We Sued The State Of Florida For Improperly Caring For A Child

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Jayne Amelia talks with amazing, astounding and ever persistent Gay Courter.

Gay Courter is the author of 7 bestselling novels with over three million copies in print worldwide including The Midwife, The Midwife’s Advice, Code Ezra, River of Dreams, Flowers in the Blood, and The Girl in the Box. Her non-fiction works include The Beansprout Book and How To Survive Your Husband’s Midlife Crisis, and I Speak for this Child: True Stories of a Child Advocate, which was nominated for a Pulitizer Priz for non-fiction. She is also a distinguished travel writer. www.gaycourter.com

Gay has served as a volunteer in the Florida Guardian Ad Litem program since 1989 in which she acts as the court appointed advocate for neglected and abused children. Her book about her experiences, I Speak For This Child: True Stories of a Child Advocate, brought national attention to the cause. She has appeared on The Today Show, Good Morning America, Day One, NBC Weekend Edition, and in Newsweek, the Los Angeles Times, Christian Science Monitorand other national publications as an expert on these issues and was nominated for a Pulitzer Prize. Gay has also received the Child Advocate of the Year award in Florida for her work as a Guardian Ad Litem, the Sharon Solomon Child Advocate Award from the Florida Center for Children and Youth, and special recognition from the Florida Chapter of American Women in Radio and Television, Inc. for her work on Where’s My Chance? The Case for Our Children, which also won an Emmy. Gay received her second Emmy from the National Academy of Arts and Television Sciences, Suncoast Chapter, for a series of public service announcements called Solutions for America’s Children. She has been selected as one of the 10 most admired women in Citrus County twice—in the community service and arts categories.

In 2004, Gay, her husband, Philip, and daughter, Ashley, jointly won the Angels in Adoption from the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute and nominated by Congresswoman, Ginny Brown-Waite.

Gay is married to her collaborator in documentary films, Philip Courter. They have produced almost hundred films on child welfare topics and specialize in media about children’s issues and strengthening family. Clients include National CASA, the National Council of Family and Juvenile Judges, the Pew Commission on Children in Foster Care, the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption, and the North American Council on Adoptable Children. The Courters have two sons, Blake, a specialist in computer design development and engineer; and Joshua, an ethnographic filmmaker and builder/designer. In 1998, they adopted Ashley, then age 12, who spent 9 years of her life in Florida’s foster care system in 14 different homes. Ashley’s bestselling book about her experiences is called Three Little Words and is in development as a feature film.

Together the Courters continue to work professionally and personally so that other children will not be lost in the system like their daughter was.

For more information see
gaycourter.com
courterfilms.com
National CASA/GAL Association For Children