How to Gain Confidence

So...when you ask any golfer - beginner, to intermediate to pro...what do you think is required for you to have to play great golf, you know what their answer is? Well, let’s try it out. Let me ask you, what do you think is the number one thing that you think you’ll need to have to play great golf. And I don’t mean things like...a great swing, or an ability to read the putts well or be able to hit it long or having the latest and the greatest equipment...what I mean is what you’ll need to possess as a player. Like a characteristic, emotion or a feeling that will elevate your game and help you play your best. One word. CONFIDENCE. I don’t think anyone will disagree with any sports or even anything in life...that confidence is a good thing and sometimes, it’s really a game-changer. So, I want to spend some time talking about what I think it is, and how we can implement and grow it within us so that we can be at our best.

But first, what is confidence? Well, I think it’s a belief. It’s a belief in yourself that you have the ability to do what is set before you and the ability to do it well. And that you have a pretty realistic sense of that and you feel very secure in that knowledge.

So, is this a born trait? Some people just have it and some people don’t? Or, is this related to some type of childhood upbringing or trauma? You have a parent or coach that told you that you are beyond talented and that you can do anything, vs you grew up everyone telling you that you suck and you’ll never measure up?

Is confidence innate or is it learned? Well, thanks for asking...such a great question you guys. I think we fundamentally misunderstand it. I think most of us think that it’s a personality trait.

The students’ self-perceived ability was a significant predictor of achievement. It was even more important than their IQ. So, this is huge!! Especially when we apply this in golf. Our perceived ability...let’s go back to our original definition of confidence, confidence is your belief in yourself that you have the ability to do what is set before you and the ability to do it well. And that you have a pretty realistic sense of that you feel very secure in that knowledge...that trumps our IQ. It doesn’t matter how smart you really are...it doesn’t matter how great and talented you are...it’s the fact that you believe in yourself that you have the ability to do it. That’s what matters most when it comes to performance.

So, what does that mean? It means that when you are faced with a shot that you know how to do, the “how-to” is not as important as you believing that you can do it. Mind blown.

So, as I said before, you might be blessed with awesome genetics of confidence...you are just a confident person and it comes easy to you. Which is awesome, you can step up and sink a clutch putt and pull crazy shots out of the bag at opportune moments...it’s just within your DNA...and trust me, I know athletes like this. But, if you are that person, it’s still good for you to recognize and continue to work on building your confidence in other aspects of your game. And for the rest of us, I included, I need some help on how to level up my confidence now knowing that it’s a key to my golf....my golf success.

So, I did some more study and research and I’ve listed 3 best ways to improve your confidence.

Gain experience

Duh, this sounds so logical and simple yet a lot of people miss this. Someone will say, man, I am having a lot of challenges with my chipping. I am duffing it a lot and I feel so much uncertainty when I am addressing the ball for a chip. Instead of trying to think just happy thoughts before the chip thinking that will solve your problem, how about you spend an hour hitting chips over and over again? Gain experience hit 10, 20, 30. 100 in a row without duffing it. You will naturally gain confidence. You will start to program your mind that the next shot will go the same as your last 30 shots. Keep building that by creating an experience. Create experience by repeating.

Also, I want you to listen to episode 5 on the secret sauce to awesome practice. I talk about this deep research on what repetitive practice can do. It’s awesome!! It has something to do with Myelin and your neural pathway. It will really help you gain perspective on what “experience” can do for your game.

Build Authentic and Healthy Mindset

I really like this because a lot of sports psychology talks about confidence like it’s just a state of mind. Think and act confident and you will become confident. Look at yourself in the mirror every day and say...”I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, people like me” and people will start liking you. Lol. I think there’s a bit of truth in that but also I think we are smarter than we think. Meaning, we can’t fool ourselves. Our confidence has to be authentic. If we suck at something, we can’t all of a sudden switch our minds to t...