
Ask Christopher West
Theology of the Body Institute

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When My Heart Shuts Down in the Bedroom, Losing Friends After Leaving a Toxic Relationship, My Toddler Thinks Confession Is a Wedding | ACW335
Ask Christopher West
06/02/25 • 57 min
- How can I open my heart emotionally to my wife during sex after a history of porn and brokenness?
- How do I heal and forgive after losing friends and community following a controlling relationship and new engagement?
- Is there a Theology of the Body insight in my toddler mistaking confession for a wedding?
Resources:
COURSE SCHEDULE
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Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.
Questions answered this episode:
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Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.
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🔥 Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body
⚡️ Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community!
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🎥 Check out our YouTube Channel
📚 View our COURSE SCHEDULE to register for a course, ONLINE or IN-PERSON!
📘 GOOD NEWS ABOUT SEX & MARRIAGE by Christopher West. Use discount code MARRIAGE during checkout for 20% off one or multiple copies.
🏔️ Join us on one of our pilgrimages!
If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: [email protected]

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Body Image | ACW169
Ask Christopher West
03/28/22 • 42 min
What light can TOB shed on separated boys and girls schools? What light can TOB shed on body image? What's the relationship between the Sacred Heart of Jesus and Theology of the Body?
Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.
REGISTER for FREE for Revealed: Become What You Are (May 13-15, 2022)
Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community!
Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.
Resources mentioned this week:
Join us on a [Pilgrimage](tobpilgrimages.com)!
View our COURSE SCHEDULE to register for a course, ONLINE or IN-PERSON!
If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: [email protected]
Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.
If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!
Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals.
Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Cheese Cake Soul Mate | ACW86
Ask Christopher West
08/24/20 • 33 min
Isn't the phrase "Natural Family Planning" somewhat misleading? What are your thoughts on a single woman fostering and perhaps adopting children? Can I expect God to communicate to me through "signs"?
Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.
Access the 2020 Theology of the Body Virtual Conference with a Premium Pass!
Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute? Become a Patron!
Q1: Dear Christopher and Wendy, I thank you wholeheartedly! I started listening to the podcast to learn more about TOB for my ministry, but the Lord was waiting for me there mainly to help me personally and heal my wounds. I’m a missionary priest and I have eleven brothers and sisters, now all of us in their thirties and twenties. I know we are the fruit of my parent’s daily challenge to discover and accept God’s will, needing His grace day by day anew.
I have some reservations about the expression “(Natural) Family Planning” - not about its real meaning but isn't it somehow confusing? Don’t you see a contrast between Christian spouses discerning continuously God’s will for their Family and the way most people in the world understand “family planning”. Did JPII use this expression? What do you think about it?
Q2: I am a 40 year old single woman who wished to have been married, but it seems that time may be past. I have come to acceptance of this and look forward to what God may have in store for me for the rest of my life, even if it may lead back to marriage. My question is: my heart has always gone out to foster children and I have this intense desire to give them a loving home. This comes up from time to time. But I hesitate, as I understand they may even more desperately need a male role model in their lives, and I wouldn’t have that in place. What are your thoughts on a single woman fostering and perhaps adopting children? Would this even be a wise thing to do?
Q3: Hello, Christopher and Wendy! I want to know your opinion about asking the Holy Spirit for signs and when I say signs I mean like: “If today I see a guy with a blue shirt holding a cheesecake, You're telling me that he is my soulmate.” I exaggerated but I guess you get it. In the old testament there are examples of God using signs. Sometimes He says what the sign will be; sometimes a specific sign is requested from Him. Can I ask or expect God to communicate to me this way?
Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.
Resources mentioned this week:
Register for TOB1 in person with Bill Donaghy: November 15-20, 2020
If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: [email protected]
Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.
If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!
Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals.
Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Beyond Rejection | ACW70
Ask Christopher West
05/04/20 • 36 min
I'm very saddened by the loss of the Eucharist in quarantine. What do I do? God created man (male and female) in his own image, but God is not biological. How does this work? How do I deal with deep feelings of rejection after divorce and annulment?
Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.
Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute? Become a Patron!
Q1: My question is about quarantine and the Eucharist, and I am sure others can relate. I have recently been falling more in love with the Lord through the Eucharist, but I took it for granted that He would be there at Mass every Sunday, and I didn't take time out of my week to go to daily Mass, which I now regret. I ache deeply to receive Jesus sacramentally and I long for the physical closeness of receiving Him in the Eucharist. I realize that the ache is a good thing, in a way, but often find myself resenting the fact that I cannot now receive Communion, and I tend toward self pity in this, not prayer. How can I recognize the grace God is offering in this time of trial and pray into the ache it is bringing about in my heart?
Q2: So in Genesis 1:27, which I'm sure you're very familiar with, it says "So God created humankind in his image, in the image of God he created them, male and female he created them."
So it says that God created them in his image, but he doesn't have a body, so it must be a different kind of image, not a biological one. But he says that he created them in the image of God, then he continues to elaborate by saying that that image is in the gender of Male and female. So my question is, if being in God's image is not meant biologically, how is it shown in the genders of male and female?
Q3: I am currently undergoing the divorce and annulment process. One of the largest reasons for things ending is that she just refused to have a physical relationship with me. After a lot of detailed conversations with priests and my counselor I can accept intellectually that I am not to blame for this, but I am really struggling with deep feelings of rejection and that there must be something wrong with me. Any advice?
Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.
Resources mentioned this week:
TOB Virtual Conference May 8-10, 2020
Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.
If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!
Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals.
Featuring music by Mike Mangione.
Produced by Sounder and Key.

Make Peace with the Journey | ACW67
Ask Christopher West
04/13/20 • 45 min
Is taking communion spiritually the same as taking communion physically? Can we experience the true communion of persons in Eden here on Earth? As a woman, I struggle with the number of men who watch porn. I feel like I should be more thoughtful about the way I dress as a result. What do you think?
Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.
Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute? Become a Patron!
Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.
Q1: I've heard a lot of people talking about making an act of spiritual communion. Does this replace taking physical communion?
Q2: Through JPII's perspective, is Christ saying that if we regain our humility and trust in God, we can, in a sense, go back to Eden and experience that true communion of persons? Maybe i'm romanticising it to be a return to the perfected image of God, instead of the best we can be in our broken image of God after The Fall. I can see how we can't necessarily reside in that perfect communion of persons due to our brokeness, but can we experience it even for a moment in this life? What are your thoughts and experience with this? I don't know if i should hold out hope for this, or clarify my understanding. Thanks! Sending my love!
Q3: It makes me so uncomfortable knowing how many men watch porn that I live in constant fear someone will look at me and objectify me or sexualize me. I dress modestly, though I'm almost paralyzed by fear of a random man looking at me a certain way. I have a wonderful boyfriend who loves me and doesn't objectify me, and I'm so comfortable around him and my wonderful Catholic guy friends. I would like to dress femininely and elegantly, but I fear showing the shape of my body. I don't want to hide that I'm female obviously. I don't know what to do. How do I cope with the fear of being sexualized? Thank you for reading! I appreciate all you do and absolutely love TOB!
Resources mentioned this week:
Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.
If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!
Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals.
Featuring music by Mike Mangione.
Produced by Sounder and Key.

Who's the Captain? | ACW89
Ask Christopher West
09/14/20 • 37 min
How do you reconcile St. Paul's writings in Romans with Theology of the Body? How do you reconcile the saints' words that say Celibacy is the superior vocation when the Sacrament of Marriage is so beautiful and ordained by God? Is there a video series you would recommend for introducing TOB to my parish?
Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.
Access the 2020 Theology of the Body Virtual Conference with a Premium Pass!
Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute? Become a Patron!
Q1: I've heard you mention that we are not spritual beings stuck in a human body and that the human body is good, but when I read Roman's 7:18, St. Paul says, "Nothing good dwells in me that is in my flesh." The more I read Roman's chapter 7, the more I feel like the human body is not good. Can please explain to me what St. Paul meant.
Q2: I am a 21-year-old entering into my senior year at a Catholic University and I have always wanted to be a nun. My parents' marriage is not a healthy one, so growing up, I ran away from the vocation to marriage. That is, until a little while ago when I had what I like to call a "Maria von Trapp" moment where I realized that I had fallen for someone. Because of this, I decided to take a course on Theology of the Body. This led to the healing of my "marriage wounds" and I soon fell in love with the beauty and richness of the vocation to marriage. My question, though, is how can I know for sure if I am meant to pursue the vocation to marriage? What if I have the grace for living Continence for the Kingdom and I choose marriage instead? Is this choosing a lesser good over the greater good? And, how do you reconcile the saints' words that say Celibacy is the superior vocation when the Sacrament of Marriage is so beautiful and ordained by God?
Q3: I would like to introduce TOB to my parish. Is there a video series that you would recommend?
Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.
Resources mentioned this week:
Register for the TOB Congress!
FULFILLED SERIES 3-DVD SET + 1 STUDY GUIDE
FULFILLED GROUP STUDY KIT (3-DVD SET + 10 STUDY GUIDES)
If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: [email protected]
Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.
If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!
Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals.
Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Seeing Through the Window | ACW76
Ask Christopher West
06/15/20 • 40 min
How do I forgive my perpetually dysfunctional family? What do you think about the Latin Mass? How do I understand the part of the Litany of Humility that says "from the desire of being loved, deliver me, O Jesus"? Aren't we made for love?
Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.
Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute? Become a Patron!
Q1: My question is about forgiveness. I live in a family with 5 adult kids and there are many dysfunctional patterns of expressing emotion and dealing with conflict. Many of my family members, myself included, have a difficult time forgiving. I know as Catholics, we are called to forgive the way Jesus forgave us; but I don't understand the difference between forgiveness and living in dysfunction. I feel that the dysfunction has to be solved before I can say, "I forgive you" and let things go; but that often leads to holding grudges and resentment, often for days on end. I don't know how to forgive while still addressing dysfunctional dynamics and not becoming a door mat.
Q2: I wanted to know your thoughts on the Traditional Latin mass? Do you believe it was necessary to change the mass in Vatican II? I believe so much of TOB aligns with the traditional Latin mass. I’m drawn to it and the reverence of it, what do you think and have you ever gone to the Latin mass regularly? Thank you for all you do!
Q3: I recently came across the Litany of Humility and I am wondering about how to reconcile this line “from the desire of being loved, deliver me, O Jesus” with marriage. My understanding is that the love of God is sufficient; however, if a marriage is a reflection of the marriage we will have with God in heaven (hopefully), then shouldn’t we desire our spouse to love us? Also, we were created to love and be loved; therefore, why should I pray to not desire love when that’s precisely what I was created for? Only God’s love?
Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.
Resources mentioned this week:
The Chosen TV Series
The Catholic Marriage Summit 2020
Love is Patient but I'm Not by Christopher West
Spirit of the Liturgy by Cardinal Ratzinger
TOB Institute Virtual Conference en Español
TOB Institute Virtual Conference - Premium Pass
Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.
If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!
Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals.
Featuring music by Mike Mangione.
Produced by Sounder and Key.

A Promise of Immortality | ACW119
Ask Christopher West
04/12/21 • 36 min
Why in vitro fertilization and artificial insemination are sinful. How to overcome fears of sexual intimacy. Where to find an integrated understanding of chastity.
Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.
Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community!
Patron Question:
I’ve been thinking about infertility. I know the Church teaches that some ways of achieving a pregnancy like sperm or egg donors are sinful, but I don’t fully understand why.
Question 2:
Dear Christopher and Wendy, I’ve just discovered your podcast and all your work. I have so much to learn and know that God wants to enlighten so many things for me, but I’ve never had a boyfriend. Now that I’m 24 and I am looking to see if God wants me to get married , I do get scared at the thought of sex. Sadly, I grew up thinking that sex was a forbidden thing, and I find myself afraid thinking about my wedding night. I know it’s a gift and it’s a donation, but I can’t help being afraid. I don’t know the male body and feel so insecure in so many ways. I have the desire to fulfill my vocation and mission as a woman to give my life and to bring to the world children that may love God above everything, but I’m so human and afraid. What should I do to prepare myself in this time, to heal from these thoughts even while I’m still single?
Qestion 3:
Hi. I am an occupational therapist, and a health/life coach who wants to help people with mental health issues to be more integrated in their bodies and with God. I am looking for a more thorough understanding of integration and chastity. What do you recommend?
Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.
Resources mentioned this week:
Register for the 2nd Annual Theology of the Body Virtual Conference! (April 30-May 2, 2021)
Register for online or in-person courses with the Theology of the Body Institute!
Theology of the Body for Beginners
Good News about Sex & Marriage
Men, Women, and the Mystery of Love: Practical Insights from John Paul II’s Love and Responsibility
If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: [email protected]
Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.
If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!
Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals.
Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Here's the Deal | ACW122
Ask Christopher West
05/03/21 • 40 min
How can I reclaim purity after falling? How can a friendship become a romantic relationship?
Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.
Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community!
Patron Question:
Hi Christopher and Wendy. I’ve been listening to your podcast for a little over a year. I grew up, (thankfully!) with a very wholesome understanding of sexuality. I know that is rare. Despite the best efforts of my parents though, there were many needs in my heart for love and understanding, beauty and respect that went unmet. . . as I matured, these “holes” in my heart made me very vulnerable to the desires of other women my age who saw me as an opportunity to have their “needs” met. There’s a lot said in Christian circles about the lusts of men, but very little about the ways women use men so I think I was unprepared for this. I am very deeply empathetic, and am often told that I am very handsome. . . I share this because I think it explains why so many women have ended up using me to gratify their desires. Over time I began using these women back in different ways and eventually lost my resolve to save myself for marriage. Now, I feel so sick. I am exposing these wounds and needs to the blessed mother in prayer, but still every time thoughts of sexuality come to my mind, I feel a twisting in my stomach instead of the awe and wonder I had when I was much younger. What do I do? I feel like I have been compromised in the worst way.
Question 2:
Christopher, I know you’ve told this story a lot but here is the deal: my female best friend is attracted to me. Honestly, she is smart, very beautiful, very very funny and I know I can count on her anytime, she is simply the best. . . But, I just can’t see her as anything more than a friend right now. Christopher and Wendy, I want what you have, and I really want the best for her but I don’t know if I’m the best for her. Christopher, how did you turn your friendship with Wendy into romantic love?
Qestion 3:
My wife and I have been married for over 30 years. As we’ve gotten older, we’ve had to adjust our physical relationship because of health issues. I know this is a sensitive question, but I want to know what is permissible for couples who are able to experience sexual climax but cannot comfortably have penetration.
Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.
Resources mentioned this week:
View our COURSE SCHEDULE to register for a course, ONLINE or IN-PERSON!
Get a PREMIUM Pass for the 2nd Annual Theology of the Body Virtual Conference!
Good News about Sex and Marriage
If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recomended on this podcast, contact: [email protected]
Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.
If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!
Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals.
Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

"Excretory Functions In Heaven", "My Husband Won't Reverse His Vasectomy" and " the Marital Embrace Before Original Sin" | ACW271
Ask Christopher West
03/11/24 • 46 min
Questions answered this episode:
- Do you think we’ll still have our excretory functions in the eschaton?
- I’m a new convert to the faith. My husband is still a non-catholic and had a vasectomy some time ago. I don’t think he will reverse it. Do you have any advice?
- Was there sex before original sin? Was marriage meant to last for eternity?
Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.
🔥 Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body
📕 Get a copy of Christopher's [Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty](www.eatingthesunrise.com)
⚡️ Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? Join our Patron Community!
Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.
Resources mentioned this week:
Donate for Reversals
Want to join us on one of our pilgrimages? Click here
🎥Check out our YouTube Channel
📚 View our COURSE SCHEDULE to register for a course, ONLINE or IN-PERSON!
📘 GOOD NEWS ABOUT SEX & MARRIAGE by Christopher West. Use discount code MARRIAGE during checkout for 20% off one or multiple copies.
🏔️ Join Bill Donaghy on a pilgrimage to the UK to walk in the footsteps of C.S. Lewis, J.R.R. Tolkien and G.K. Chesterton. July 16-25, 2024
Get details here
🌟 For professional Catholic Life Coaching, including Porn Recovery, click here
If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: [email protected]
Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.
If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!
Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals.
Featuring music by Mike Mangione.
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FAQ
How many episodes does Ask Christopher West have?
Ask Christopher West currently has 338 episodes available.
What topics does Ask Christopher West cover?
The podcast is about Christianity, Religion & Spirituality and Podcasts.
What is the most popular episode on Ask Christopher West?
The episode title 'When My Heart Shuts Down in the Bedroom, Losing Friends After Leaving a Toxic Relationship, My Toddler Thinks Confession Is a Wedding | ACW335' is the most popular.
What is the average episode length on Ask Christopher West?
The average episode length on Ask Christopher West is 43 minutes.
How often are episodes of Ask Christopher West released?
Episodes of Ask Christopher West are typically released every 7 days.
When was the first episode of Ask Christopher West?
The first episode of Ask Christopher West was released on Jan 7, 2019.
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