Church or Cult Pt 2: Cults

This episode will dive into the complexities and deep effects of cults/cult-like environment.

TALKING POINTS

What is a cult?

• Definitions:
  • Cult (Culture)- “a misplaced or excessive admiration for a particular person or thing”- websters
• A few signs:
  • Leader(s) are the ultimate authority. Have no accountability or “Yes-men”
  • Others are shamed or discredited in some way for leaving the group or challenging beliefs/practices
  • Shame Cycles: Need this group to feel loved, worthy or significant.

Narcissistic leadership in “Church”

• The narcissist and the needy (perfect relationship match)
  • Ex: Hillsong/Ravi situations (Can maybe mention these situations)
• Signs
  • Very Charismatic/charming personalities
  • Love-bombing/flattery
  • Manipulative
  • Gaslighting
  • Controlling

Healing

• The aftermath/disconnecting
  • Examine fruit
    • Does leadership actions match their words?
    • Learning the difference between imperfection vs deep character flaws
  • Shame and Doubt
    • Give yourself space to question your beliefs and see what remains true (this can be very scary/lonely, but worth the journey)
    • Finding faults in yourself not perpetrators
  • Vulnerability (jump from cult to cult)
  • Reconnecting with God & Others (scared to trust Christians/churches)
• Ways to heal
  • Therapy
  • Safe Community (Marks of a healthy church community)
    • Find someone that can validate your pain and help you grieve. Talk about it!
  • Rest (Maybe take time off from local church/serving until you feel comfortable)

Recommendation Book/Links

Combating Cult Mind Control by Steven Hassan:

Audiobook: https://www.audible.com/pd/Combating-Cult-Mind-Control-Audiobook/B07GZVGN9F?source_code=GO1DH13310082090P1&ds_rl=1262685&ds_rl=1263561&ds_rl=1260658&gclid=CjwKCAjwjuqDBhAGEiwAdX2cj57D_1DJe48WXjEtnR6UEoF3QHe-PxI9NO_9H7wlSYL8hMl1Hx8h7hoChDkQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

Safe People by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr John Townsend

Book: https://www.amazon.com/Safe-People-Relationships-Avoid-Those/dp/0310345790