Vulnerability Part 4- How to Not Receive Someone // Episode 78
11/25/20 • 26 min
"I'd like to think I'm a good listener. In fact, let me tell you a story about me being a great listener...rather than actually listen to you." It's an oft-experienced phenomenon-- we start to think maybe genuine sharing of selves is about to happen, and then out of nowhere, we throw up a roadblock to real intimacy.
It's good to know about these roadblocks, and why they hinder real, meaningful conversations, so we share three of them. We referenced another pretty heavily in the third part of the vulnerability series, and that one is the giving of advice (when not asked for).
They're not always bad, and sometimes even good, but when we habitually turn a conversation into a storytime, or start praising someone evaluatively, or start reassuring them, we're thoughtlessly turning conversations into discussions about ourselves, our opinions, and our convictions, rather than giving the other a chance to share their side.
If you'd like to hear about more of them, let us know, or check out where we got them from: We're pulling from a book called People Skills, by Robert Bolton: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003BFXAS0/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_tkin_p1_i0
It's a good book. It's not perfect, but it's ok.
As always,
- check out our work, and join our email list, at https://ouroutpost.org/
- join our free resource library platform here
- catch our other podcast, Love Your Marriage, by clicking here: https://ouroutpost.org/podcasts/
- see what we have upcoming in terms of events here: https://ouroutpost.org/events/
- send us an email at [email protected]
- and please rate, review, and share!
- If you're a Catholic husband, feel free to sign up for some time to chat with Joseph! https://bookme.name/ouroutpost/45-minutes-with-joseph
"I'd like to think I'm a good listener. In fact, let me tell you a story about me being a great listener...rather than actually listen to you." It's an oft-experienced phenomenon-- we start to think maybe genuine sharing of selves is about to happen, and then out of nowhere, we throw up a roadblock to real intimacy.
It's good to know about these roadblocks, and why they hinder real, meaningful conversations, so we share three of them. We referenced another pretty heavily in the third part of the vulnerability series, and that one is the giving of advice (when not asked for).
They're not always bad, and sometimes even good, but when we habitually turn a conversation into a storytime, or start praising someone evaluatively, or start reassuring them, we're thoughtlessly turning conversations into discussions about ourselves, our opinions, and our convictions, rather than giving the other a chance to share their side.
If you'd like to hear about more of them, let us know, or check out where we got them from: We're pulling from a book called People Skills, by Robert Bolton: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003BFXAS0/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_tkin_p1_i0
It's a good book. It's not perfect, but it's ok.
As always,
- check out our work, and join our email list, at https://ouroutpost.org/
- join our free resource library platform here
- catch our other podcast, Love Your Marriage, by clicking here: https://ouroutpost.org/podcasts/
- see what we have upcoming in terms of events here: https://ouroutpost.org/events/
- send us an email at [email protected]
- and please rate, review, and share!
- If you're a Catholic husband, feel free to sign up for some time to chat with Joseph! https://bookme.name/ouroutpost/45-minutes-with-joseph
Previous Episode
Vulnerability Part 3- How to Receive Someone // Episode 77
It's vulnerable to share with someone. It's also vulnerable to be the one receiving someone, and to avoid that discomfort, we tend to practice poor listening skills. Actually taking the time and energy to hear someone may take practice, but it's effort that is worth it.
Also, we talk at the end about how a certain Catholic practice tells us what receiving people should look like, ideally.
As always,
- check out our work, and join our email list, at https://ouroutpost.org/
- join our free resource library platform here
- catch our other podcast, Love Your Marriage, by clicking here: https://ouroutpost.org/podcasts/
- see what we have upcoming in terms of events here: https://ouroutpost.org/events/
- send us an email at [email protected]
- and please rate, review, and share!
- If you're a Catholic husband, feel free to sign up for some time to chat with Joseph! https://bookme.name/ouroutpost/45-minutes-with-joseph
Next Episode
Genesis 9-- Noah, Ham, Canaan, and Christ // Episode 79
There are those who tend to treat the story of Noah as a kid's story. While we don't use explicit language, the content we will be discussing is not child-friendly, and we don't recommend listening to it with children around. Because the end of the story of Noah is not child-friendly. It is filled with drunkenness, rebellion, nakedness, incest, cursing, and a baby born into a very broken family.
We reference Leviticus 18, Genesis 35, and 2 Samuel 16, and then later we reference Luke 1 and John 19.
We also reference the movie A Hidden Life, but in large part because it's hard to not think about it after we saw it a few days ago. If you want your heart to hurt, give that movie a watch.
Biggest takeaway: The story of mankind's brokenness is met with the grace of God, which brings light into darkness.
Let us know what you think! You can check our our Facebook page/group, or send us an email at [email protected]. Feel free to also share, rate, review, and talk to others about this!
As always,
- check out our work, and join our email list, at https://ouroutpost.org/
- join our free resource library platform here
- catch our other podcast, Love Your Marriage, by clicking here: https://ouroutpost.org/podcasts/
- see what we have upcoming in terms of events here: https://ouroutpost.org/events/
- send us an email at [email protected]
- and please rate, review, and share!
- If you're a Catholic husband, feel free to sign up for some time to chat with Joseph! https://bookme.name/ouroutpost/45-minutes-with-joseph
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