A Little English
Edward Cooper Howland
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Winnie-the-Pooh Chapter I: In Which We Are Introduced to Winnie-the-Pooh and Some Bees, and the Stories Begin
A Little English
08/03/22 • 31 min
I'm doing a little survey to find out more about ALE listeners. There are just four tiny questions. It will only take a minute or two, and will help me a LOT! Please check it out. Thanks, Cooper
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Season 1 Episode 1Thank you for downloading the very first episode of ALE!
I'm very excited to begin this journey with you.
👉Check out some of the original art by EH Shepard:
Pooh and Christopher Robin coming downstairs.
👉The story begins at 2:20 and the tiny lessons begin at 21:12
👉You can find the transcript after the Credits!
👉Visit our website to download the Podcast User's Manual and find out more! https://alittleenglish.com/
A Little English is written, produced, recorded, edited, mixed, mastered and scored by Edward Cooper Howland.
All stories are either in the public domain, or written by me.
Copyright 2023 Edward Cooper Howland
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TRANSCRIPT:
INTRO 0:00
Hi. My name is Cooper Howland, and this is...A Little English. Every episode, I read a short story. After the story, there are three tiny lessons.
If you’re really serious about studying using this podcast, please go to my website, www.alittleenglish.com. I’ve made a Podcast User’s Manual that can give you some ideas about how to study with podcasts. If you just want to listen, then relax and enjoy.
So, let’s get into this story. Today we are reading Chapter One of Winnie-the-Pooh by AA Milne. I’m really excited about reading this book. When I was a kid, my dad used to read it to me before bed, or when I was sick. I have some really great memories of this book, so I’m very excited to share it with you.
Now, this first chapter is a little confusing because it’s actually two stories. The first one is about a boy named Christopher Robin, and his stuffed bear, Pooh. Christopher Robin’s father is going to tell him a bedtime story. The second part is the story that the father tells. Then at the end, we return to Christopher Robin at bedtime. I hope that it’s not too confusing, but don’t worry. The rest of the stories aren’t like that.
In order to maybe make it easier, I’ve brought in a guest to help me tell this story. This is Tabatha TABBY WORDS and she’s going to be playing Christopher Robin.
And in the end, if the structure is too confusing, the best thing you can do is just....don’t worry about it! It’s a beautiful, funny little story. Just relax and listen to the melody and the rhythm of it. Enjoy yourself! Are you ready? Let’s begin.
STORY 2:20
I
In Which We Are Introduced to Winnie-the-Pooh and Some Bees, and the Stories Begin
Here is Edward Bear, coming downstairs now, bump, bump, bump, on the back of his head, behind Christopher Robin. It is, as far as he knows, the only way of coming downstairs, but sometimes he feels that there really is another way, if only he could stop bumping for a moment and think of it. And then he feels that perhaps there isn’t. Anyhow, here he is at the bottom, and ready to be introduced to you. Winnie-the-Pooh.
When I first heard his name, I said, just as you are going to say, “But I thought he was a boy?”
“So did I,” said Christopher Robin.
“Then you can’t call him Winnie?”
“I don’t.”
“But you said—”
“He’s Winnie-ther-Pooh. Don’t you know what ‘ther’ means?”
“Ah, yes, now I do,” I said quickly; and I hope you do too, because it is all the explanation you are going to get.
Sometimes Winnie-the-Pooh likes a game of some sort when he comes downstairs, and sometimes he likes to sit quietly in front of the fire and listen to a story. This evening—
“What about a story?” said Christopher Robin.
“What about a story?” I said.
“Could you very sweetly tell Winnie-the-Pooh one?”
“I suppose I could,” I said. “What sort of stories does he like?”
“About himself. Because he’s that sort of Bear.”
“Oh, I see.”
“So could you very sweetly?”
“I’ll try,” I said.
So I tried.
—---------------------
Once upon a time, a very long time ago now, about last Friday, Winnie-the-Pooh lived in ...
Forty Stories - "Alone"
A Little English
08/02/23 • 20 min
This is a story about popcorn, mostly. It's also about religion and weddings and cleaning. But mostly it's a story about microwave popcorn. It stars Matthew, who was sort of the villain of the story called "Flow." And if we're being honest, he's the villain of this story, too. But I love him. I hope you do as well.
👉The story begins at 2:00 and the tiny lessons begin at 15:12
👉You can find the transcript after the Credits!
👉Visit our website to download the Podcast User's Manual and find out more! https://alittleenglish.com/
A Little English is written, produced, recorded, edited, mixed, mastered and scored by Edward Cooper Howland.
All stories are either in the public domain, or written by me.
Copyright 2023 Edward Cooper Howland
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TRANSCRIPT:
Hi. My name is Cooper, and this is...A Little English. Every episode, I read a short story. After the story, there are three tiny lessons.
Before we begin, I’d like to say thank you for listening, and ask you to tell your friends about the show. I don’t do any advertising, so you spreading the word is really the only way that the audience can grow. Thank you so much!
Now
Where I come from, we were always taught that there are two things you don’t discuss at dinner: religion and politics. The reason for that is, because people will start shouting at each other. But this story opens with a conversation about religion. Ok it’s not a conversation, it’s people shouting at each other. But don’t worry. This is not really a story about religion. Actually it’s mostly about....popcorn?
Anyway, the name of this story is, “Alone,” which is also the name of my favorite song to sing at karaoke.
—------
“If it’s in a church, I’m not going,” said Matthew.
Mom and Dad were already dressed for the wedding. Dad was wearing his suit and Mom even put on earrings. They looked at each other and sighed. “He gets this from you,” said Mom.
Dad rested his head in his hands for a moment. Then he stood up and spoke to his son.
“Matthew, it’s a wedding. Of course it’s in a church.”
“Well if it’s in a church, then I am not going. I will not worship your false gods. You’ll have to leave me here.”
“You don’t have to worship anything. Just sit there like a normal human being and then we go and have cake. It’s a party. It’s a celebration of love.”
“It’s a lie!” shouted Matthew. “It’s all lies! It’s a scam! They scare you with stories of hell and pain forever. Then they take your money.”
“Matthew, it’s a congregational church. They don’t have any money.”
“I don’t care! They get money for free and then they don’t pay any taxes!
It’s the biggest scam in the world. And if you go, or if I go, we are saying that this scam is okay. So you can do whatever you want, but I’m not going.”
“This is just some stupid stuff you saw on the internet. You need to get off the computer and get out in the real world.”
“I AM in the real world, Dad! I believe in science and YOU PEOPLE believe in magic!”
“You don’t have to believe in the religion to go to a wedding, Matthew. You just go to support your family and friends on their big day.”
“I’m. Not. Going.” Matthew sat down on the floor.
His parents went to the living room. Matthew could hear them shouting at each other through the closed door. After a few minutes, they came out. Mom was fixing her eye makeup with a tissue. Dad spoke first.
“Fine. You’re fourteen years old now. If you want to stay home alone, you can. We will be back by ten pm. Try not to burn the house down.”
Four hours later, Matthew realized that he was hungry. He put down the game controller and wandered into the kitchen. He looked through the refrigerator but it was all his Mom’s gross health food stuff. So he went to the closet and got a bag of microwave popcorn.
“How long are you supposed to cook it for?” he said out loud to nobody. “Whatever.”
He put the bag in the microwave, set it for seven minutes, and went back to his video games. He was very busy killing zombies when he noticed a weird smell.
Like something burning. Something really, really horrible burning.
“Oh,” he said. “Oh, no.”
Matthew ran into the kitchen. Black smoke was pouring out of the microwave and up the wall.
“Oh, no,” he said.
The popcorn bag was completely on fire.
“Oh, my god,” he said.
Little blue sparks started to explode inside the popcorn bag. He could hear them popping and sizzling. Matthew sat down on the floor. He wrapped his arms around his knees and rocked back and forth.
“Oh, my god,” he whispered. “Oh God, What do I do?”
And in that moment, he became totally, perfectly ca...
forty Stories - "Mixtape"
A Little English
07/19/23 • 20 min
Have you ever lost a friend? Not, like, lost them at a concert. I mean, have any of your friends died? A few of mine have. This is a story about losing a friend. And the pain of losing that friend. It's a story about how groups of friend cope with the loss of a member. And about family, and brothers. But mostly, it's a song about the power of silly pop songs. I hope you love it, because I'm very proud of this story.
Season 3 Episode 16
Thank you for downloading this episode.
👉The story begins at 03:20 and the tiny lessons begin at 15:45
👉You can find the transcript after the Credits!
👉Visit our website to download the Podcast User's Manual and find out more! https://alittleenglish.com/
A Little English is written, produced, recorded, edited, mixed, mastered and scored by Edward Cooper Howland.
All stories are either in the public domain, or written by me.
Copyright 2023 Edward Cooper Howland
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TRANSCRIPT:
Hi. My name is Cooper, and this is...A Little English. Every episode, I read a short story. After the story, there are three tiny lessons.
I hope you guys are all enjoying this Forty Stories project. If you are, please do me a huge favor and share this show with a friend. Do you know anyone else who likes podcasts? Or who is trying to improve their English? Please share this show with them. I don’t do any advertising or anything, so I need your help to reach a larger audience. Thank you!
I think I can safely say that we have entered act two of forty stories. Pretty much every story has three acts. There is a beginning, a middle and an end. Middles are usually the hardest part to write. But actually I’m really excited about this, because it means I’m done introducing characters. The world is built. So it’s time to really explore these people and this world. Time to have them meet each other and interact! I think it will be really exciting.
By the way, there is a content warning on this story. It’s about death. Specifically, it takes place a few years after someone commits suicide. So nobody dies in the story, but somebody did die a few years ago. So if you don’t feel good about listening to that right now, come back another time. It’s a good story, and important, but it’s kind of...heavy.
Also, there are a lot of song titles in this story. And I think that if you don’t know the songs, it would be very helpful for you to read the transcript, get the names and listen to them on youtube or whatever. I think the story will make more sense when you hear the songs.
So anyway, here’s the story. It’s called “Mixtape”
I thought I was early, but they were already waiting for me. Kevin and Ben were sitting in camping chairs around a pile of wood. And there was another person with them. Maybe a girl? Or a little kid? Either way, I was pretty upset. It took a few minutes to climb down from the top of the sand dune, and a few more to get close to where they were sitting. The mystery person was sitting on the other side of the pile of wood.
I dropped my case of beer down next to me and just started yelling. “Guys, what is this? This is supposed to be our night. Remember, we talked about this? No girlfriends, nobody but us and - “
The kid stood up, and I could see that it was Finn. He was apologizing.
“Tommy, I’m not gonna stay. I was just talking to Kevin last week, and I told him about this thing that I found, and we thought you all should see it. Or, like, hear it.”
I was so shocked that I just sat down in the sand.
“Oh Finn,” I said, “I’m so sorry, kid. I had no idea it was you. I thought one of these knuckleheads brought their girlfriend or something. I had no idea, dude.”
Kevin spoke up.
“Nobody is trying to mess with tradition, Tommy. It’s just us and Mark here tonight. I mean I was thinking that sooner or later Finn should join us, but he’s only - how old are you, Finn?”
“I’m twelve.”
“Right so Finn’s only in - seventh grade?”
“Sixth.”
“Sixth grade, right. So he’s not really old enough to, like, hang out. But I was thinking, maybe he’s old enough to hang out for a minute anyway. And then he brought me this tape.”
He handed me a cassette tape. Like from the 80s. Like, for music. The case was clear plastic, with a folded paper insert. The writing on the paper was definitely Mark’s. It looked like a teenage girl had done it. It read, “Mark’s Pop Mix, Volume One.” It didn’t have a tracklist.
“So like, do we have something that can play this thing?”
Ben smiled at me. “We do, but we’re waiting.”
“Waiting for what?”
“For midnight.”
Finn walked home around ten. By midnight, the fire on the beach was going strong and so were we. Ben...
Forty Stories - "Brave"
A Little English
07/05/23 • 20 min
I'm doing a little survey to find out more about ALE listeners. There are just four tiny questions. It will only take a minute or two, and will help me a LOT! Please check it out. Thanks, Cooper
👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇
Season 3 Episode 15Thank you for downloading this episode.
👉The story begins at 03:40 and the tiny lessons begin at 15:15
👉You can find the transcript after the Credits!
👉Visit our website to download the Podcast User's Manual and find out more! https://alittleenglish.com/
A Little English is written, produced, recorded, edited, mixed, mastered and scored by Edward Cooper Howland.
All stories are either in the public domain, or written by me.
Copyright 2023 Edward Cooper Howland
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TRANSCRIPT:
Hi. My name is Cooper, and this is...A Little English. Every episode, I read a short story. After the story, there are three tiny lessons.
Before we get started, I’d like to ask you a favor. I really hate social media, and I don’t really want to pay for advertisements. That means, the only way to grow the audience of A Little English is...you. If you’re enjoying the show, and you think it’s helping you learn, please go tell someone about it. You guys must have done it the last couple weeks, because listeners are going up! Please keep going! I’m very grateful for the help!
This week’s story is about horses. Have you ever ridden a horse? I have. Actually, I grew up in the country and our neighbors had a horse boarding business. That means that rich people from Boston, who didn’t have any space to keep a horse, they would rent a spot for it from our neighbors. And then come ride them on weekends and stuff. So I grew up like right next to horses. They were around all the time. But I never got to ride those, because they were someone’s like private, luxury item.
Later, when I was a kid at camp (like we talked about last episode), I did learn to ride. We went for two or three or five-day camping trips, riding horses all over Colorado. I was probably 12 years old, and I just can’t believe how lucky I was that I got to do that. Man I gotta write a story about that camp, one of these days.
Anyway, let’s get to the story. It’s called “Brave,” and it has nothing to do with the animated movie. Sorry, nobody turns into a bear.
—-------------
“Careful now,” said Dad. “Don’t show him your fingers. He might think they’re little carrots and take a bite.”
Cassandra froze, terrified. “It’s OK,” the teacher said. “Just be careful. Turn your hand around and let him smell the back of it. Like with a dog.” Cassandra got a little closer. The horse was enormous, and it smelled like sweat and dust and grass. She took another step towards it and held out her hand.
The horse leaned its head in and sniffed her. Its breath was so loud! When it opened its mouth, Cassandra could hear the sound of its lips separating. When the mouth closed again, she could actually hear its teeth bang together. It was like hearing someone breathe or talk right next to your ear, except it wasn’t even that close!
Cassandra knew a lot about horses. She had a few books and a lot of youtube channels on her mom’s phone. She knew about bridles and saddles and she knew how to brush a horse’s fur after a ride. She knew that you start from the front and go to the back, never the other way. She knew how much horses love being brushed. But she didn’t know until today what they smell like. And she didn’t know how noisy they were.
The horse didn’t bite her. It breathed in and out over her hand until it decided she didn’t have any food, so it put its head down and searched the dusty floor for something to eat. Cassie reached up further and put her hand on its shoulder. The muscles moved under its skin. She was mesmerized.
“You wanna get up in the saddle?” asked the teacher. Cassie was pretty sure her name was Sarah. She shook her head. Dad frowned.
“Why not?”
“You said it’s gonna bite my fingers off.”
“Well, no, I said you gotta be careful. Are you scared?”
That was a difficult question to answer. Cassie thought about it for a minute. “Yes.”
“Well, what do we always say about being scared?”
They said it together. “You can’t be brave if you’re not afraid.”
Cassie nodded at this, and then reached up to the teacher. Sarah grabbed her under the armpits and lifted her into the saddle. This was very high up indeed. She was taller than the teacher. She was the biggest.
When the teacher patted the horse on the neck, it started to walk. Cassie couldn’t believe it. Her whole body leaned right, then left, as the horse put one foot in front ...
Forty Stories - "Shelter"
A Little English
06/21/23 • 16 min
I'm doing a little survey to find out more about ALE listeners. There are just four tiny questions. It will only take a minute or two, and will help me a LOT! Please check it out. Thanks, Cooper
👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇
Season 3 Episode 14Thank you for downloading this episode.
👉The story begins at 01:50 and the tiny lessons begin at 11:40
👉You can find the transcript after the Credits!
👉Visit our website to download the Podcast User's Manual and find out more! https://alittleenglish.com/
A Little English is written, produced, recorded, edited, mixed, mastered and scored by Edward Cooper Howland.
All stories are either in the public domain, or written by me.
Copyright 2023 Edward Cooper Howland
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TRANSCRIPT:
Hi. My name is Cooper, and this is...A Little English. Every episode, I read a short story. After the story, there are three tiny lessons.
Before we get started, I’d like to ask you a favor. If you’re enjoying the show, and you think it’s helping you learn, please go tell someone about it. The best thing you can do for a podcast is to share it with someone who might enjoy it. Thank you so much!
Today’s story is about camping. Do you go camping? I used to go a lot. But this year, since I moved to Chiba, I haven’t been yet. I really miss it. When I was a kid, I went to summer camp every year and it was amazing. Actually, I should make that one of the forty Stories. Hey, good idea!
Anyway, this story is called “Shelter,” and it’s about how frustrating it is to put up a tent. And some other stuff.
—---
The sky was orange and the clouds were pink. The sun’s reflection was sparkling in the lake, and my father was swearing quietly. “Dammit,” he said. “I told you, Evan. I told you we had to leave earlier. Now we’re gonna have to set up the tent in the dark.” His t-shirt was already soaked in sweat.
We arrived in front of the main office, and the car skidded a bit in the dirt. Dad sat very still for a moment. Then he slowly took his hands off the steering wheel. His fingers were white. He looked around at all the campsites full of happy families, and took a deep breath. “At least we have a reservation. Come on.”
We dragged all our gear past rows and rows of brightly-colored tents and fantastic barbecue smells. I could barely see over the bag of groceries in my arms , and I almost tripped over running, screaming kids. Pop music thudded from a speaker somewhere. Dad frowned and whispered to me, “Maybe other people don’t wanna listen to your crappy music, guys. Know what I mean, Evan?” I liked that song, but I didn’t say anything.
Finally, we came crashing into the last empty campsite. We threw all the equipment down and stood there for a moment sweating and breathing hard in the thick summer air. We must have looked pretty funny, because our neighbor smiled at us when he waved. This guy didn’t even have a tent, just a fancy-looking hammock hanging between two trees. He was sitting on his little cooler, smoking a cigarette and messing with his fire.
“Come on, Evan,” said Dad. “Let’s get this stupid tent up.” He stared at me, waiting for something. “The poles!” I found the bag of poles and tried to get one out. “Just dump them all out. Come on, man. We have to hurry. Everyone else is already eating. Look, just hold the pole. Just hold it right there, while I fix it on this side. It’s not that hard.”
He was sitting on the ground cross legged, trying to fit his end of the pole into the little loop at the corner of the tent and making little noises. It was hot and he pulled on the pole really hard and I lost my grip on my side of it. “Come on, buddy! What are you even doing to me here? Just hold it steady so we can get this thing up, and then we can eat!”
“I don’t know how to do this, Dad,” I told him. “You and mom always set up the tent.” As soon as I mentioned Mom, his face changed. His eyes closed, and his jaw got very hard. He let go of the pole, which flopped away from him. He stopped messing with the pole and looked up at me. “And now she’s not here any more, is she? So you and me gotta get it done. So just, like, get on my team for one minute here, you know?”
Once the tent was up, we had to start the bbq in the dark. Dad forgot to bring a lighter so he sent me out to ask one of our neighbors. I walked over to the single guy next door. He was smoking and messing around with the wood in his little grill. A half-empty bottle of whiskey was sitting on the ground next to his camp chair.
“Hi, sir, sorry to bother you. Do you have a lighter? My dad forgot to bring one.” The guy reached into a few differen...
Forty Stories - "Advanced Dungeons and Dragons"
A Little English
06/07/23 • 20 min
I'm doing a little survey to find out more about ALE listeners. There are just four tiny questions. It will only take a minute or two, and will help me a LOT! Please check it out. Thanks, Cooper
👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇
Season 3 Episode 13Thank you for downloading this episode.
👉The story begins at 02:40 and the tiny lessons begin at 15:10
👉You can find the transcript after the Credits!
👉Visit our website to download the Podcast User's Manual and find out more! https://alittleenglish.com/
A Little English is written, produced, recorded, edited, mixed, mastered and scored by Edward Cooper Howland.
All stories are either in the public domain, or written by me.
Copyright 2023 Edward Cooper Howland
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TRANSCRIPT:
Hi. My name is Cooper, and this is...A Little English. Every episode, I read a short story. After the story, there are three tiny lessons.
So, let’s start with some notes! I got some feedback on the last episode. First of all, I made a mistake with someone’s name, which made the whole story very hard to understand. Sorry! I fixed it now. Second, I’ve heard that sometimes it’s hard to know when we have changed scenes. So I have made up a new sound. It sounds like this: (ping) That’s how you know that some time has passed between the last scene and the new one.
Now! This is a story about Dungeons and Dragons, or DnD. Do you know what that is? Do you play? I do. But if you don’t, don’t worry. The story’s not really about playing the game. Just go watch the first episode of Stranger Things and you’ll understand everything you need to. It’s more about what it means to be a nerd. Because, well, that has changed a lot over the years. These days, being a nerd is cool. But when I was a kid, it really, really wasn’t. And there are still a lot of people who are pretty upset about those old days and...well, I’m giving away the ending. So, let’s just listen!
This story is named after my favorite episode of the TV show Community: It’s called....Advanced Dungeons and Dragons!
“If Alexander doesn’t get here in the next ten seconds, we’re starting without him,” said Frankie. The kids around the table all nodded.
“Three, two, one. OK, screw him. Let’s go around the table and introduce our characters. Babe?”
Mandy looked up from her phone and said, “I’m, uh, Kai Highfeather, a wood elf wizard.”
“Cool! Corey?”
Lonnegan said “My name is Bimble Bogwater. I’m a halfling sorcerer.“ He stopped and stared at the floor as everyone started laughing.
“A halfling?” gasped Finn. “You’re a halfling?”
“What’s funny about that?”
“Dude, you’re like, eight feet tall. Why don’t you play an orc?”
Lonnegan’s face turned red. “I dunno, I thought that like, the whole point of the game is we can be anything.”
Frankie put out his hands. “You guys. You guys! Come on! Let him be a halfling. If he-“ and now he was interrupted by the sound of the door banging open.
Everyone looked up the stairs to see Alexander standing in the doorway. His face was bright red and he was completely out of breath. He was holding a large book to his chest.
“YOOOOO!” He shouted. “You guys gotta see this. You GOTTA see this.” He jumped down the stairs two at a time, and slammed the book onto the table. Dice and pencils fell on the floor.
“Dude, calm down!” said Frankie.
“Don’t worry about that, dude. Look at this.” He pulled the book open and showed it to everyone. It was a photo of three boys, posing in the school library. This was their high school library! But the fashion was all wrong. It was at least twenty years ago. The kids in the photo were holding up books with dragons and wizards on them.
“The names,” said Alexander. “Look at the names.”
They all leaned in to stare at the tiny names under the picture.
Samuel Lewis
“Dude,” whispered Frankie. “Your dad...was the leader of the high school Dungeons and Dragons club?
———
The next day, Frankie stayed at school after the last bell. He walked down the long, boring hallways to the faculty area, and found Mr. Lewis’ office. He knocked politely on the door.
“Come in.”
Mr. Lewis was at his desk, grading papers.
“Oh, young Mister Gallagher. What can I do for you today?”
“Well, actually, I had a question for you, Mr. Lewis. See, um, Alexander and I, we’re in a kind of gaming group together, and uh, well, he found this yearbook, in the library, from 1999.”
Mr. Lewis put his pencil down. “Yes?”
“Well, uh yeah. So, it says that you were in the DnD club all four ...
Forty Stories - "Scandalous"
A Little English
05/24/23 • 20 min
I'm doing a little survey to find out more about ALE listeners. There are just four tiny questions. It will only take a minute or two, and will help me a LOT! Please check it out. Thanks, Cooper
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Season 3 Episode 12Thank you for downloading this episode.
👉The story begins at XXXX and the tiny lessons begin at XXXX
👉You can find the transcript after the Credits!
👉Visit our website to download the Podcast User's Manual and find out more! https://alittleenglish.com/
A Little English is written, produced, recorded, edited, mixed, mastered and scored by Edward Cooper Howland.
All stories are either in the public domain, or written by me.
Copyright 2023 Edward Cooper Howland
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TRANSCRIPT:
Hi. My name is Cooper, and this is...A Little English. Every episode, I read a short story. After the story, there are three tiny lessons.
Today’s story is about gossip and scandal, and maybe some romance. In a retirement village. You know, an old folk’s home. Now you might think, “those people are old! They don’t do romance!” And let me tell you, that is not true. If you don’t believe me, just go ask google. Do a search, in English or in your first language about old people romances. But, uh. You have been warned. Old people get WILD.
Now, anyway, here’s my story about two best friends and their adventures in the retirement village. It’s called.....”Scandalous.”
—-
"Karen," whispered Susan, in her best conspiracy voice, "has got a boyfriend."
"Karen who?" replied Dominic. He leaned in until Susan could smell the coffee on his breath .
"Karen Friedlander. From Greenfield. She lives down the hall from me."
"How do you know?"
"Well, you know how I don't sleep well anymore? I wake up at least twice a night to go to the bathroom, and then it takes me a long time to get back to sleep. Sometimes I'm laying there for an hour, just staring at the ceiling."
"I've been listening to podcasts. Do you know about podcasts? It really helps you fall asleep. You should-"
"Don't interrupt me, Dom. Now, where was I? Ah yes so last night, I heard him. It must have been two o'clock in the morning, and I heard him sneaking down the hall."
"Sneaking?"
"Yes, sneaking. Like tiptoeing. Like, not walking the way a security guard walks."
"So you heard someone walking-"
"Sneaking-"
"Sneaking in the hall, and you think that means Karen has a boyfriend?" Dominic leaned back, unimpressed. He took another sip of coffee.
"No!" Susan leaned in to him now. She put her hand on his knee. "I thought it was strange, because who goes walking around in here at two a.m? But then Karen opened her door. I know it was hers, because Jody's apartment is right next to mine, and it definitely wasn't that one.
"What did she say?"
"She didn't say anything. But whoever it was, he went inside. There was no more sneaking around. I stayed up almost another hour, but I didn't hear anything."
"Well," Dominic leaned back, scratching his chin. He had shaved that morning, but had missed a few bits here and there. "Karen's got a boyfriend. Or. How do we know it's even a BOYfriend?"
Susan leaned back, her hand on her heart.
"You think....you think....no..."
"I mean, why not? It's the twenty-first century, after all. Anything is possible. And people get so lonely around here."
"That would be....the biggest thing that has ever happened here. If we could find out who it is..."
"Everyone would come to us for details. We could be the king and queen of Shady Acres." Dominic touched his finger to his lips, and stared into the distance. "We need a plan."
-----
"This is a stupid plan," whispered Susan into her phone.
"I know it is, Susan, but it's the best we've got."
She sighed, set the phone to 'speaker' and put it down in her lap. "Who do you think it is?".
"I really don't know. It could be anybody..." he waited a moment. "Maybe it's Betty."
"You really think it's a woman?"
"I hope so! It would be such a delicious scandal."
"You old hound dog. Why Betty?"
"Well, ever since her husband died, the two of them have been spending a lot of time together."
"Of course they have. Betty's lonely. And so's Karen.
"Mmm-hmmm"
"Quit it. And she's only sixty-seven or whatever. I wish my Jim had died when I was still young and bouncy like she is."
"Well, you should have married a millionaire twice your age, like Karen did. Then you could have just inherited everything and had some fun before you got your hips replaced!"
"Shhhh...
Forty Stories - "Play Ball"
A Little English
05/10/23 • 18 min
I'm doing a little survey to find out more about ALE listeners. There are just four tiny questions. It will only take a minute or two, and will help me a LOT! Please check it out. Thanks, Cooper
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Season 3 Episode 11Thank you for downloading this episode.
👉The story begins at 01:40 and the tiny lessons begin at 14:00
👉You can find the transcript after the Credits!
👉Visit our website to download the Podcast User's Manual and find out more! https://alittleenglish.com/
A Little English is written, produced, recorded, edited, mixed, mastered and scored by Edward Cooper Howland.
All stories are either in the public domain, or written by me.
Copyright 2023 Edward Cooper Howland
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TRANSCRIPT:
Hi. My name is Cooper, and this is...A Little English. Every episode, I read a short story. After the story, there are three tiny lessons.
Today it’s another sports story. It’s interesting, because I can write these stories about anything I want. And I’m not really a sports guy. But I did play a lot of sports when I was a child, and it seems like a lot of these stories are about being young. But I can tell you this: i love baseball. It’s my favorite sport to watch and to play. Some people think it’s boring, but I just love it. I love the rhythm of it. It relaxes me.
This story, though. Not very relaxing. Why? You’ll have to listen to find out.
The name of this story is Play Ball
“Oh come on,” said Coach Bob. “Ump, you’ve gotta be kidding me. That kid’s like six feet tall!”
Finn and the other players gathered in their dugout and whispered to each other as their coach walked angrily to meet the umpire near home plate. The two grown-ups spoke quietly, but urgently. Coach Bob was waving his hands around as he talked, becoming more and more upset, as the umpire tried to calm him down. Finally they calledthe other coach, who walked slowly over, his hands on his hips.
“Can you hear what they’re saying?” one of the boys asked Finn.
“No, but I’ll bet he’s swearing a lot.”
The adults kept arguing for a few minutes. Bob was now pointing at the gigantic player on the other team and shouting at the other coach. Finn could see the sweat stains forming under his armpits as he waved his cap around. Finally, Bob turned and stomped back to his team. His face was purple. He was holding his cap so tightly in one hand that he’d bent the brim.
“Well, boys. I don’t know what to tell you. That kid’s twelve. His parents had to show his birth certificate at the beginning of the season. His name is Lonnegan, and he’s probably gonna end up playing in the Major Leagues.
“But coach,” someone said, “He’s got a mustache!”
“I know he’s got a moustache, Pendleton. I know he’s a monster. But he’s in sixth grade, same as you, and you’re gonna have to play against that monster. Now, do you have anything else you wanna complain about?”
The kids all looked at each other, and then at their feet.
“Oh yeah, and he’s the pitcher. So, good luck. Now bring it in here, and let’s work on a strategy to win this game.”
From the diamond, the boys heard the umpire shout
“Play Ball!"
---
By the fourth inning, the score was already eight to one. Finn leaned heavily on the back wall of the dugout and watched Lonnegan strike out his teammates.
Pendleton was walking back from home plate. Maybe he was crying. It was Finn's turn at bat. Two outs. Nobody on base. All alone against the monster. He stood in the batter's box. He tapped his bat against his shoes, like the pros do on TV. He got into his stance.
Lonnegan shifted his weight back, then forward. Finn didn't even see the ball come in, but he heard it hit the catcher's mitt with a loud leather slap.
"Ball one!" screamed the umpire.
Finn realized that his eyes were closed. He opened them just in time to see Lonnegan throw the next pitch.
Another ball, low this time. Two-and-oh.
Another. Three balls, no strikes. He heard Coach Bob shout, "He's getting tired, Finn! Knock it outta the park!"
More than anything else in the world, Finn wanted to be somewhere else. Everyone was watching him, staring at him. Cheering. Or shouting? He couldn't tell. The sun was in his eyes. His helmet was too loose.
A strike this time. Three-and-one. Coach Bob screaming, "Swing, kid! Swing! It's your time, Finn!"
Another strike. Full count.
All he had to do was wait. Don't swing. Don't step out of the batter's box. Just hold this pose, with the bat up and back. Look ready, and let this enormous kid throw the ball. Whatever happened, it w...
Forty Stories - "Two Thousand and One"
A Little English
04/26/23 • 20 min
I'm doing a little survey to find out more about ALE listeners. There are just four tiny questions. It will only take a minute or two, and will help me a LOT! Please check it out. Thanks, Cooper
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Season 3 Episode 10Thank you for downloading this episode.
👉The story begins at 02:25 and the tiny lessons begin at 15:02
👉You can find the transcript after the Credits!
👉Visit our website to download the Podcast User's Manual and find out more! https://alittleenglish.com/
A Little English is written, produced, recorded, edited, mixed, mastered and scored by Edward Cooper Howland.
All stories are either in the public domain, or written by me.
Copyright 2023 Edward Cooper Howland
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TRANSCRIPT:
Hi. My name is Cooper, and this is...A Little English. Every episode, I read a short story. After the story, there are three tiny lessons.
And welcome to my new studio in Chiba, outside Tokyo. Do I sound a little different? I’m recording in a new studio, but with all the same gear. I hope it sounds good!
Tonight’s story is a flashback. We are going all the way back to 2001, in Charleston, South Carolina. Why? Because that’s where I was in 2001. And what was I doing? Pretty much the same thing these people in this story are doing. Going to college. Acting badly. You know. So, like all my stories, none of these events actually happened to ME. But maybe I was there Maybe I was one of the other people at the party, in the backyard of a fraternity house.
You might want to google that before you begin. Try “College of Charleston Fraternity Houses,” on Google Images. It will give you a pretty good idea of where this story takes place. And honestly, the architecture is pretty awesome. Check it out.
The name of this story is...Two Thousand and One.
“Hey,” says Sam. “How you doing tonight?”
The girl looks up at him and pretends to be surprised. Sam sees a thin line of beer on her upper lip as she lowers her red plastic cup long enough to reply,
“Uh, I’m good. Nice party.” She immediately raises the cup back to her lips.
“This is my place,” says Sam. “Or, like, it’s my fraternity’s place....I live here.”
“Cool,” she says. “I’ve been here a few times.”
“I thought I’d seen you before,” says Sam.
Sam knows that they are both lying. She is lying because his fraternity has a party nearly every weekend. And this girl has been at almost every single one. She always arrives early and stays close to the keg. She drinks as fast as she can, and doesn’t talk to anyone. As soon as the beer is gone, so is she. He is lying because he knows all this about her. He has been waiting for the right moment to talk to her since at least Christmas.
On the second floor of the fraternity house, a window slides up. One of his brothers screams like a barbarian and drags a huge pair of speakers out onto the windowsill. Rap beats thunder out. The kids in the back yard cheer and the crowd starts moving to the music.
“What’s your name?” asks Sam.
“I’m Eleanor.”
“Cool,” he says. “You wanna dance with me, Eleanor?”
She looks nervous. “I don’t really know how to dance to this kind of music.”
He reaches out and gently puts his hand on her hip. She lets it rest there. “I don’t really either,” he says. “Let’s give it a try?”
———
Sam sleeps in this room every night, but tonight, when he opens the door with Eleanor behind him, it is like he is seeing it for the first time. How did it get this bad? He cannot see the floor beneath the collection of dirty laundry, beer cans, textbooks, hamburger wrappers and god knows what other kinds of trash.
“Sorry,” he tells her. “I really didn’t think that anyone was gonna come up here tonight.” He frowns at the bed - actually just a naked box spring with a mattress sitting on the floor - and sweeps all the clothes off it. He sits down on the mattress and pats the space next to him.
She stares at him for a moment. She’s going to leave. She’s going to turn right around and walk out the door, and - to be honest - that would be the right thing to do. No girl would ever stay with him in a room this filthy. What was he thinking?
Slowly, cautiously, she steps over the garbage on the floor, and sits beside him on the bed. Sam’s stomach melts, like broken glass and hot lava.
“Uh,” he says. “Uh, do you like U2?”
“The band?”
“Yeah.”
“Not really.”
“Oh, uh me neither,” he lies, again. “But they have this one song that I think is like, super-awesome. Do you know, ‘One?’”
She tells him that she’s not sure, and - b...
Forty Stories - "Frog Pond"
A Little English
02/15/23 • 18 min
I'm doing a little survey to find out more about ALE listeners. There are just four tiny questions. It will only take a minute or two, and will help me a LOT! Please check it out. Thanks, Cooper
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Season 3 Episode 5Thank you for downloading this episode.
👉The story begins at 1:40 and the tiny lessons begin at 12:56
👉You can find the transcript after the Credits!
👉Visit our website to download the Podcast User's Manual and find out more! https://alittleenglish.com/
A Little English is written, produced, recorded, edited, mixed, mastered and scored by Edward Cooper Howland.
All stories are either in the public domain, or written by me.
Copyright 2023 Edward Cooper Howland
⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐
TRANSCRIPT:
Hi. My name is Cooper, and this is...A Little English. Every episode, I read a short story. After the story, there are three tiny lessons.
And we are back into Forty Stories! So, this story was written by me. I have to apologize, I have tried to do two different accents. Now to be fair, I’m from Massachusetts, and I spent six years living in South Carolina, so I think I’m probably OK at doing accents from those places. But I guess I’ll let you decide. If it’s hard to understand people talking, go check out the show notes! Read along with the text as I’m speaking. It’s good practice for weird American pronunciation. Let’s check it out!
Frog Pond
It was not a good day to be outside. Kim shivered in her overcoat. Her cheeks hurt, even inside the mask. Boston Common in February was not beautiful. It was gray, and the parking in the garage was twelve dollars an hour!
Cassie was excited, though. She pulled Kim’s hand as they approached the Frog Pond. “Look, Mom! They’re skating!”
There were maybe fifteen people on the ice. They were trying to go in circles, but the wind pushed them back, crashing them into the railing and each other. Kim and Cassie fought their way to the ticket counter.
“That’ll be thirty-two dollars, ma’am.” The woman in the booth shrunk down into her enormous parka as Kim stared at her.
“Thirty-two?” Kim couldn’t believe it.
“Yes, ma’am. It’s eight dollars for you, free for your daughter. Plus skate rental is fifteen for adults and ten for kids.”
Kim sighed, and pulled another twenty-dollar bill out of her wallet.
“You shouldn’t be out here in this weather,” said Kim.
“I haven’t got much else to do,” said the lady. “and I’m used to it. Some days are awfully pretty, especially after a good snow.”
Kim looked around. “Pretty like today?”
“Oh, no,” said the woman. “But tomorrow should be nice. Is this your first time in Boston?”
“No,” said Kim. “Well, sort of. It’s our first time in the Common. We’re renting a place in Cambridge. But Cassie just HAD to go skating before the season ended.”
“Is it her first time skating?” asked the woman.
“It’s both of our first times. We’re from South Carolina, originally. My husband got a job, and we just...moved up here. Just like that.”
“Well, you might want to try a lesson.” The woman pointed to a poster on the wall.
“We can’t afford that much,” Kim turned to take Cassie’s hand, but she wasn’t there.
“Cassie? Cassie? Cassandra?” She was trying to sound calm. She clapped her hands, but the gloves muffled the sound, and the wind carried it away.
“Cassandra Norton, you come out right now!”
Kim half-walked and half-ran over to the railing. She leaned on it and stared at the ice.
Most of the skaters weren’t very good. Couples on dates held hands and laughed. Children fell over and cried. Their parents rushed to them, wiping snow from their coats and tears from their eyes.
And Cassandra was gone.
“Is something wrong, ma’am?” It was the woman from the ticket counter. Kim realized now that was standing up, that she was tiny.
“Oh, well, I’m very sorry. My daughter wandered off.” She sounded so natural. Like it was no big deal. Her daughter was lost in a snow storm in a public park in this strange city, and she was acting like it was no big deal.
“Oh dear,” said the lady. “Did you check the ice?”
“That’s what I was just doing, but I don’t see her.”
“Well, don’t worry,” said the lady. “Let’s go check the bathrooms.”
“Thank you so much. What’s your name?” asked Kim.
“I’m Mary.”
“And do you work here?”
“Oh, no not really. I’m a volunteer.” She showed Kim a badge with her face on it, pinned to her parka. Her hand shook slightly. “I retired a few years ago and I don’t have much going on. So this keeps me busy. Now, let’s look in the st...
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FAQ
How many episodes does A Little English have?
A Little English currently has 45 episodes available.
What topics does A Little English cover?
The podcast is about Fiction, Language Learning, Podcasts and Education.
What is the most popular episode on A Little English?
The episode title 'forty Stories - "Mixtape"' is the most popular.
What is the average episode length on A Little English?
The average episode length on A Little English is 21 minutes.
How often are episodes of A Little English released?
Episodes of A Little English are typically released every 7 days.
When was the first episode of A Little English?
The first episode of A Little English was released on Jul 19, 2022.
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