Dealing With Loss, Elizabeth Semenova Ep. 6

Elizabeth Semenova is the Director of Operations at Integrated MD Care. She shares her insights and personal stories about dealing with loss. The holidays can be an especially difficult time, listen to how Elizabeth handled her own loss and how she and Dr. Bob help others. Transcript Dr. Bob: Welcome to A Life and Death Conversation with Dr. Bob Bob Uslander. I'm here with a guest who I'm excited to introduce everybody to, and somebody who has a wealth of experience and insights. And I'm very pleased to have her as part of my expanding team here at Integrated MD Care. So you're going to get to know quite a bit about my new director of operations for the practice, Elizabeth Semenova.Elizabeth, say hello to our listeners. Elizabeth: Hello. Dr. Bob: So Elizabeth came to us a few months back. And the way that we initially met was through a referral that she had made to us for a gentleman who was struggling with Parkinson's disease and was really at the tail end of his life, and Elizabeth made a recommendation that he contact us. And it was a real blessing for us to be able to meet this gentleman and guide him through the last weeks of his life. After that, we just had a few more encounters. And, Elizabeth, maybe you can share how what it was about what we do that drew you in and kind of encouraged to you to reach out and try to become part of the tribe. Elizabeth : Well, after I referred friends, clients to you, I looked more into what it is that you do and how you do it, and explored information that I received from other sources about your work, and I was inspired by your openness to life and death and your perspective on the importance of accepting and talking about death as a part of life. I was particularly intrigued by your willingness to support patients and families who are looking for resources, education, and services regarding the End of Life Option Act in California. So that's how I came to connect with your practice. Dr. Bob: Cool. Well, we're very happy that you did, and just to kind of summarize, Elizabeth came on, and we didn't have a social worker who was working with us. Elizabeth has a master's in social work and had been working as a social worker within the hospice world for several years. And we were really blessed to have her come and go out. She went out on a handful of patient visits when I was doing initial evaluations for people who were looking at aid and dying. And it was a real blessing to have her expertise and just her presence there to support those patients and families. Then we just had some changes at the office, and it became very clear that Elizabeth had a strong leadership ... had some strong leadership experience and genes. And everybody in the practice really felt comfortable with her guidance, and I offered her the position to help lead the practice, which has been great. So it's just been a short time, but the difference in our efficiency and just getting things done has jumped quite a bit. So we appreciate your very wise counsel and leadership, and it will continue to be a blessing for all of us for a long time to come. Elizabeth: I'm very humbled by your confidence and appreciation. Dr. Bob: Well, there's more to come. So let's talk a little bit ... We've had some conversations, many conversations around our individual kind of perspectives and feelings about death and how to work with people through those challenges. I know that you've had some very personal experience with loss and death in your life, and I'd like to hear a bit about that if you're comfortable sharing. And let's see how we can provide some valuable guidance, comfort, wisdom for some other people who might need that at this point. Elizabeth: Sure. I first encountered grief and loss and bereavement when I was in seminary, and I took a class on the subject. I remember being very inspired by everything that we read and discussed, but feeling a little disconnected from it, not really knowing how to understand it or contextualize it. Dr. Bob: Had you had any personal loss up until that point? Elizabeth: I had lost grandparents, but no unexpected losses, no tragic losses at that point. And several years later, I was living in Colorado with my daughter, who was nine at the time, and we received a phone call from my brother-in-law, who was my daughter's father's brother. So my daughter's father and I were married when she was a baby and had since separated but stayed very, very close as family and friends. And his brother called me to let me know that he had died suddenly in a car accident. That was my first real experience with death and loss. And at the time, as I said, my daughter was nine. So my purpose was to make the process as comfortable and manageable for her as I could, to do what I could to contribute to her healing and resilience in dealing with the loss of her father. Dr. Bob: So you were dealing with it on your own and then having to understand, learn how to navigate that for her as well. ...