You Look Nice Today

Parental interference and other awkwardtunities, pie vs invisibilty, how Adam will die, Tuesdays with Tom Waits, Wisdom Experience guaranteed, another factory closes (bagpipe soundtrack).

So sorry!, the oxygen lobby, doin’ the Skokie, Wallet-on-Chain is not a town in England, Sean Connery is Japanese, What’s your latte name?, pre-disposable feminine hygiene, @EffingBoring gets the carnation.

Unhealthy ligatures, a course of Prednisone, “I’m not following you!”, obscure chess moves, smoking for the cure, misused orifices, we pass as nosies, Karl Van Hœt.

Subject: #1228743 “Mann”
Application Date: September 4, 1980

Subject has submitted a new application to the Coolness Review Board. Note that this is Subject’s 12th separate application to the Board in just the past 2 years.

No signs of progress.

Pictured, above, is Subject’s self-declared “Summer Transformation.” No comment is required other than to note the outfit, which includes a web belt, painter’s pants, fake Adidas “four-striper” sneakers, a Dallas Cowboys T-shirt, and, tragically, Mork suspenders.

It is the recommendation of this Coolness Officer that Subject be allowed to re-apply to the Board not less then two (2) years from now, or after the cessation of puberty, whichever is soonest.

APPLICATION STATUS: DENIED (UNCOOL)

ASSOCIATED MEDIA:

cyber goth dreads
Enter the Dragon mirror scene
Hey Baby by Bruce Channel
Sad Eyes by Robert John
Infinity by Journey

PHOTOS:
Merlin Mann (top), Wikia (bottom)

Welcome to the global premiere of the International You Look Nice Today Conference & ExpoTM!

Get ready for an epic showcase of big-idea ideations and tactical tactics to be held in the picturesque Los Altos Community Centre, December 2nd 2012!

Join old colleagues and make new friends in an immersive networking environment of blue-sky solutioneering and overcoats! Experience a wide-ranging and impactful offering of Keynotes, Panels, Super-Panels, Breakout Sessions, Birds-of-a-Feathers, Hands-On Demonstrations, and Interactive Receptionettes that will lavish you with a literal bag of pro-active informational materials that you can cuddle with...today!

You will learn about:

• Vertical Market Opportunities
• Rethinking the Bindles of the Integrated Lunch Solution Space
• Etiquette of Toothbrush Dispersal
• Spokane Spoons and Sundry Gift Options
• Conference Service Conference Service Reselling Services
• Green and Sustainable Pamphleteering
• “Why Lie?”: The Ethics of Electronic Reverse Panhandling
• Far from the Tree: Leaving Your Own Paper Company
• The Post-Mortem Aerobic Media Space
• FLAC → LAME QR Code Encoding Codecs
• Hardtack and Rickshaw: Frontiers in eCommerce Exchange
• A Wide Net: Targeting the Stout Man
• Upscale Feline Premiums (US and Intl.)
• A Charlie Kaufman Multiverse: Retroscripting the Charlie Kaufmaning of Charlie Kaufman’s Charlie Kaufman
• Enhanced Social Components of Gamification Engineering
• Peanuts Envy: Cracking the Preferred Legume of the Gaul
• ROX: Finding New Returns on...Something
• “The Remora Feel”: Exploring the Physics of Virtual Viral Piggybacking
• Elements of Pipe & Drape Cos-TUME Presentation

Register TODAY!

Early Bird Registration: 10 Wampum.

Platinum Sponsors: MeeBow®, Nostalgex®, CDrivers®, NRG Hookerz!®, and Sandy's Fancy Dance-A-Tron®.