The Wizard Wheezes
OllivandersVoices
A podcast for Fan Fiction Audiobooks, read by yours truly!
All recordings are created and distributed with the authors knowledge, and links to the original works will always be available in the description.
If you have created a Fan Fiction that you would like to have recorded on the show, please don't hesitate to contact me at [email protected].
Theme music is:
"Not As It Seems" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Top 10 The Wizard Wheezes Episodes
Goodpods has curated a list of the 10 best The Wizard Wheezes episodes, ranked by the number of listens and likes each episode have garnered from our listeners. If you are listening to The Wizard Wheezes for the first time, there's no better place to start than with one of these standout episodes. If you are a fan of the show, vote for your favorite The Wizard Wheezes episode by adding your comments to the episode page.
A Hard Row to Hoe - Chapter 9
The Wizard Wheezes
02/18/25 • 50 min
Chapter 9 of A Hard Row to Hoe by BlessdToaster
The Fan Fiction was originally posted to Archive of Our Own, and can be found here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55745104/chapters/141512941
Authors Summary:
"It’s 2008 and Draco Malfoy is a secret assassin. It's legitimate - he gets paid for it, and some higher ups in the Ministry (probably?) know he’s out there... killing people. He’s quite good, but that tracks with his dubious accounting of rights and wrongs and his penchant for self-preservation. During his downtime he does a great job of acting like a pureblood in penance... mostly by drinking and shagging his way into oblivion.
This double life helps to numb Draco to the constant feelings of shame and guilt from his formative years in which he was an utter cunt- but everything is upended when his team (assassins can have coworkers, alright?) dies in action and he does not. Suspended and forced to go to therapy, Draco is adrift.
When Hermione Granger re-enters the fray, their hateful relationship that was once fraught with swotty bickering (erm, and the occasional slur) is suddenly tense in a very different way.
How will these two come together? How often will Theo say something terribly charming? Do we hate Ron or is Ron just, meh? Oh, and what’s going on with that one murderous witch who’s out to kill them all (forgot to mention that part...)?
Find out all this and more in: A HARD ROW TO HOE!"
Intro & Outro Music:
"Not As It Seems" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/v
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
A Hard Row to Hoe - Chapter 4
The Wizard Wheezes
01/31/25 • 35 min
Chapter 4 of A Hard Row to Hoe by BlessdToaster
The Fan Fiction was originally posted to Archive of Our Own, and can be found here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55745104/chapters/141512941
Authors Summary:
"It’s 2008 and Draco Malfoy is a secret assassin. It's legitimate - he gets paid for it, and some higher ups in the Ministry (probably?) know he’s out there... killing people. He’s quite good, but that tracks with his dubious accounting of rights and wrongs and his penchant for self-preservation. During his downtime he does a great job of acting like a pureblood in penance... mostly by drinking and shagging his way into oblivion.
This double life helps to numb Draco to the constant feelings of shame and guilt from his formative years in which he was an utter cunt- but everything is upended when his team (assassins can have coworkers, alright?) dies in action and he does not. Suspended and forced to go to therapy, Draco is adrift.
When Hermione Granger re-enters the fray, their hateful relationship that was once fraught with swotty bickering (erm, and the occasional slur) is suddenly tense in a very different way.
How will these two come together? How often will Theo say something terribly charming? Do we hate Ron or is Ron just, meh? Oh, and what’s going on with that one murderous witch who’s out to kill them all (forgot to mention that part...)?
Find out all this and more in: A HARD ROW TO HOE!"
Intro & Outro Music:
"Not As It Seems" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/v
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
A Hard Row to Hoe - Chapter 5
The Wizard Wheezes
02/03/25 • 34 min
Chapter 5 of A Hard Row to Hoe by BlessdToaster
The Fan Fiction was originally posted to Archive of Our Own, and can be found here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55745104/chapters/141512941
Authors Summary:
"It’s 2008 and Draco Malfoy is a secret assassin. It's legitimate - he gets paid for it, and some higher ups in the Ministry (probably?) know he’s out there... killing people. He’s quite good, but that tracks with his dubious accounting of rights and wrongs and his penchant for self-preservation. During his downtime he does a great job of acting like a pureblood in penance... mostly by drinking and shagging his way into oblivion.
This double life helps to numb Draco to the constant feelings of shame and guilt from his formative years in which he was an utter cunt- but everything is upended when his team (assassins can have coworkers, alright?) dies in action and he does not. Suspended and forced to go to therapy, Draco is adrift.
When Hermione Granger re-enters the fray, their hateful relationship that was once fraught with swotty bickering (erm, and the occasional slur) is suddenly tense in a very different way.
How will these two come together? How often will Theo say something terribly charming? Do we hate Ron or is Ron just, meh? Oh, and what’s going on with that one murderous witch who’s out to kill them all (forgot to mention that part...)?
Find out all this and more in: A HARD ROW TO HOE!"
Intro & Outro Music:
"Not As It Seems" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/v
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
A Hard Row to Hoe - Chapter 3
The Wizard Wheezes
01/27/25 • 47 min
Chapter 3 of A Hard Row to Hoe by BlessdToaster
The Fan Fiction was originally posted to Archive of Our Own, and can be found here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55745104/chapters/141512941
Authors Summary:
"It’s 2008 and Draco Malfoy is a secret assassin. It's legitimate - he gets paid for it, and some higher ups in the Ministry (probably?) know he’s out there... killing people. He’s quite good, but that tracks with his dubious accounting of rights and wrongs and his penchant for self-preservation. During his downtime he does a great job of acting like a pureblood in penance... mostly by drinking and shagging his way into oblivion.
This double life helps to numb Draco to the constant feelings of shame and guilt from his formative years in which he was an utter cunt- but everything is upended when his team (assassins can have coworkers, alright?) dies in action and he does not. Suspended and forced to go to therapy, Draco is adrift.
When Hermione Granger re-enters the fray, their hateful relationship that was once fraught with swotty bickering (erm, and the occasional slur) is suddenly tense in a very different way.
How will these two come together? How often will Theo say something terribly charming? Do we hate Ron or is Ron just, meh? Oh, and what’s going on with that one murderous witch who’s out to kill them all (forgot to mention that part...)?
Find out all this and more in: A HARD ROW TO HOE!"
Intro & Outro Music:
"Not As It Seems" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/v
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
A Hard Row to Hoe - Chapter 6
The Wizard Wheezes
02/07/25 • 60 min
Chapter 6 of A Hard Row to Hoe by BlessdToaster
The Fan Fiction was originally posted to Archive of Our Own, and can be found here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55745104/chapters/141512941
Authors Summary:
"It’s 2008 and Draco Malfoy is a secret assassin. It's legitimate - he gets paid for it, and some higher ups in the Ministry (probably?) know he’s out there... killing people. He’s quite good, but that tracks with his dubious accounting of rights and wrongs and his penchant for self-preservation. During his downtime he does a great job of acting like a pureblood in penance... mostly by drinking and shagging his way into oblivion.
This double life helps to numb Draco to the constant feelings of shame and guilt from his formative years in which he was an utter cunt- but everything is upended when his team (assassins can have coworkers, alright?) dies in action and he does not. Suspended and forced to go to therapy, Draco is adrift.
When Hermione Granger re-enters the fray, their hateful relationship that was once fraught with swotty bickering (erm, and the occasional slur) is suddenly tense in a very different way.
How will these two come together? How often will Theo say something terribly charming? Do we hate Ron or is Ron just, meh? Oh, and what’s going on with that one murderous witch who’s out to kill them all (forgot to mention that part...)?
Find out all this and more in: A HARD ROW TO HOE!"
Intro & Outro Music:
"Not As It Seems" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/v
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Courage & Conviction Chapter 30
The Wizard Wheezes
01/13/25 • 8 min
Chapter 30, The final chapter of Courage and Conviction by MotherofDogs18
Thank you so much for listening.
The Fan Fiction was originally posted to Archive of Our Own, and can be found here:https://archiveofourown.org/works/54560803?view_full_work=true
Authors Summary:
"Draco Malfoy has spent more than a decade keeping his head down and out of trouble. But when he gets wind of movement among the remaining Death Eaters, he finds that the Malfoy name closes more doors to him than it opens, making it difficult to know who to turn to. Eventually, he reaches out to the woman he tormented during their childhood and finds, to his surprise, that she seems willing to overlook the past and help him."
"Not As It Seems" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/v
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Courage & Conviction Chapter 25
The Wizard Wheezes
12/23/24 • 16 min
Chapter 25 of Courage and Conviction by MotherofDogs18
The Fan Fiction was originally posted to Archive of Our Own, and can be found here:https://archiveofourown.org/works/54560803?view_full_work=true
Authors Summary:
"Draco Malfoy has spent more than a decade keeping his head down and out of trouble. But when he gets wind of movement among the remaining Death Eaters, he finds that the Malfoy name closes more doors to him than it opens, making it difficult to know who to turn to. Eventually, he reaches out to the woman he tormented during their childhood and finds, to his surprise, that she seems willing to overlook the past and help him."
"Not As It Seems" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/v
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
The Fart
The Wizard Wheezes
01/17/25 • 25 min
The Fart - A Dramione One Shot by OfftheMap
Artwork by Winterwells
The Fan Fiction was originally posted to Archive of Our Own, and can be found here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/57156853
Authors Summary:
"All Draco Malfoy wanted was to woo Hermione Granger.
Really, it couldn't have gone any worse.."
"Not As It Seems" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/v
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Courage & Conviction Chapter 27
The Wizard Wheezes
01/06/25 • 23 min
Chapter 27 of Courage and Conviction by MotherofDogs18
The Fan Fiction was originally posted to Archive of Our Own, and can be found here:https://archiveofourown.org/works/54560803?view_full_work=true
Authors Summary:
"Draco Malfoy has spent more than a decade keeping his head down and out of trouble. But when he gets wind of movement among the remaining Death Eaters, he finds that the Malfoy name closes more doors to him than it opens, making it difficult to know who to turn to. Eventually, he reaches out to the woman he tormented during their childhood and finds, to his surprise, that she seems willing to overlook the past and help him."
"Not As It Seems" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/v
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
A Hard Row to Hoe - Chapter 7
The Wizard Wheezes
02/11/25 • 78 min
Chapter 7 of A Hard Row to Hoe by BlessdToaster
The Fan Fiction was originally posted to Archive of Our Own, and can be found here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55745104/chapters/141512941
Authors Summary:
"It’s 2008 and Draco Malfoy is a secret assassin. It's legitimate - he gets paid for it, and some higher ups in the Ministry (probably?) know he’s out there... killing people. He’s quite good, but that tracks with his dubious accounting of rights and wrongs and his penchant for self-preservation. During his downtime he does a great job of acting like a pureblood in penance... mostly by drinking and shagging his way into oblivion.
This double life helps to numb Draco to the constant feelings of shame and guilt from his formative years in which he was an utter cunt- but everything is upended when his team (assassins can have coworkers, alright?) dies in action and he does not. Suspended and forced to go to therapy, Draco is adrift.
When Hermione Granger re-enters the fray, their hateful relationship that was once fraught with swotty bickering (erm, and the occasional slur) is suddenly tense in a very different way.
How will these two come together? How often will Theo say something terribly charming? Do we hate Ron or is Ron just, meh? Oh, and what’s going on with that one murderous witch who’s out to kill them all (forgot to mention that part...)?
Find out all this and more in: A HARD ROW TO HOE!"
Intro & Outro Music:
"Not As It Seems" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/v
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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FAQ
How many episodes does The Wizard Wheezes have?
The Wizard Wheezes currently has 41 episodes available.
What topics does The Wizard Wheezes cover?
The podcast is about Harry Potter, Podcasts, Adult, Books, Audiobook, Arts and Performing Arts.
What is the most popular episode on The Wizard Wheezes?
The episode title 'Courage & Conviction Chapter 30' is the most popular.
What is the average episode length on The Wizard Wheezes?
The average episode length on The Wizard Wheezes is 27 minutes.
How often are episodes of The Wizard Wheezes released?
Episodes of The Wizard Wheezes are typically released every 3 days, 21 hours.
When was the first episode of The Wizard Wheezes?
The first episode of The Wizard Wheezes was released on Sep 16, 2024.
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