Fostering Conversations with Utah Foster Care

Join us for a candid conversation with DCFS caseworkers and foster parents to understand how DCFS works in order to strengthen partnerships in support of children and families in care. Every contact with your caseworker is an opportunity to strengthen your family.

Learn more about the Division of Child and Family Services here.

Want to learn more about becoming a Foster Parent?

Kids need their parents. Even kids in foster care. Want to learn more about helping kids AND their families? We have a wonderful story to share with you.

Talking with children about race and ethnicity can leave many parents feeling unsure about where to begin. How old should your child be to begin the conversation? How do you respond when kids of all ages ask questions about racial issues in the news? One Salt Lake foster family has experience with those conversations and can give you some good tips as to where to start.

Guests: Foster parents Amy and Michael Morris, and Diversity Specialist Esmeralda Malili

Episode Summary: In this episode of Fostering Conversations, hosts Amy Smith and Liz Rivera sit down with Angela Tucker, adoptee advocate, mentor, and founder of the Adoptee Mentorship Program. Angela shares her journey from being adopted out of foster care to building a global community for adoptees to connect, heal, and grow.

They discuss:

• Angela’s experience growing up in a multiracial family.
• The challenges of identity and belonging in adoption.
• How the Adoptee Mentorship Program is creating spaces for adoptees to connect and find support.
• The power of storytelling and mentorship in navigating adoption experiences.
• Practical tips for adoptive parents to support their children better.

Angela also offers valuable insights into racial identity in transracial adoption and the importance of building inclusive family networks. Whether you’re an adoptee, an adoptive parent, or just curious about the adoptee experience, this conversation is a must-listen.

Resources Mentioned:

• Angela Tucker’s website: AngelaTucker.com
• Follow Angela on Instagram: @AngieAdoptee
• Watch the documentary Closure on Angela’s website.
• Read Angela’s book “You should be Grateful: Stories of Race, Identity, and Transracial Adoption”
• Learn about the Adoptee Mentorship Program and Adoptee Remembrance Day.
• Explore Angela’s workshop: “Cultivating an Anti-Racist Family Network for Transracial Caregivers.”

Memorable Quotes:

• “There’s something healing about talking to someone who just gets it.” – Angela Tucker
• “We don’t just mentor kids. Adoptees at any age need spaces of belonging.” – Angela Tucker
• “Love is already there, but behaviors show you understand who we are.” – Angela Tucker

Angela Tucker Bio~

Angela Tucker is a Black transracial adoptee. She is the author of “You Should Be Grateful:” Stories of Race, Identity and Transracial Adoption. Her book was published in April 2023 by Beacon Press. Angela’s search for her biological family is featured in the documentary CLOSURE which premiered on Netflix in 2015. In 2022, Angela founded the non-profit, the Adoptee Mentoring Society to provide virtual mentorship for adoptees world-wide. With 15 years in child welfare, she has appeared on CNN, The Red Table Talk, The New Yorker, and more, advocating for adoptees.

Angela lives in Seattle with her Emmy-award-winning spouse, Bryan Tucker.

Ep 56 transcript

Foster parents learn in training classes about the uncertainty surrounding children in foster care. A child may be in their home for a few days, a year, or a lifetime. Grief and loss are a reality when a child is reunified. In this episode, we’ll explore how foster parents can get support to deal with the emotional stress of children leaving their home.

While loss affects people in different ways, many people experience the following symptoms when they are grieving. Just remember almost anything you experience in grief is normal.

Common symptoms of grief:

• Shock and disbelief—Right after a loss, it can be hard to accept what happened. You may feel numb and have trouble believing that the loss really happened, even deny the truth.
• Sadness—Profound sadness is probably the most universally experienced symptoms of grief. You may have feelings of emptiness, despair, yearning or deep loneliness. You may also cry a lot or feel emotionally unstable.
• Guilt—You may regret or feel guilty about things you did or did not say or do. You may also feel guilty about certain feelings. Sometimes, children will blame themselves for causing the loss, even though they did nothing wrong.
• Anger—Even if the loss was nobody’s fault, you may feel angry and resentful. You may feel the need to blame someone for the injustice that was done to you.
• Fear—A significant loss can trigger a host of worries and fears. You may feel anxious, helpless or insecure. You may even have panic attacks.
• Physical symptoms— We often think of grief as a strictly emotional process, but grief often involves physical problems, including fatigue, nausea, lowered immunity weight loss or weight gain, aches and pains and insomnia.

How to Support Others Who are Grieving

• Be a good listener
• Let them feel sad
• Do not minimize grief
• Do not be judgmental
• Share your feelings
• Ask about their feelings
• Acknowledge the pain
• Be available when you can
• Talk openly and honestly about the situation unless the person does not want to
• If symptoms of depression are severe or persistent and the person is not coping with Day to day activities, encourage the use of professional help

Other Resources:

• Saying Goodbye Handouts
• Grief and Finding Meaning ~ Unlocking Us Podcast
• Ambiguous Loss and Grief for Siblings in Adoption

Want to learn more about becoming a Foster Parent?