Birth Stories in Color

Meeting Emoni and listening to her pregnancy and birth reminds one of the classic interview of a young Serena Williams when the interviewer asked her repeatedly why she thought she was going to win her match. Her father Richard Williams interrupted the interview and told the reporter to “leave that alone.” The “that” he referred to was Serena’s confidence. He was deeply protective of that which he and her mother had built through practice and words. For those entrusted with the work of birth in any capacity and for those entrusted with someone sharing their birth wishes, “Leave that alone.” Birthing in confidence doesn’t mean to be ignorant of the possibilities that something could go wrong. But it does help shape the mind to prepare the body for the work ahead in pregnancy, labor, delivery, and parenthood.

Emoni knew she didn’t want to give birth in a hospital. She connected with the resources within her community to help push her vision into motion. A local midwife, the dedicated doulas of ROOTT, her child’s father, and her mother were entrusted with her vision and supported her through the birthing experience from early conception through her first 18 months of motherhood.

Laboring in her mother’s home at her own pace was an empowering experience. The birth she envisioned happened. Emoni’s mom described it as the most powerful birth she’d ever been present for.

The high of labor would soon turn to postpartum lows. Despite having extended support from her doula, Emoni struggled with postpartum depression. Having support doesn’t mean you won’t experience mental health challenges. Postpartum depression can be the perfect storm of lower oxytocin and increased cortisol. Emoni did make her way through postpartum depression. She wishes she had asked for more help but more importantly, she wished she knew what she could ask for, reflections she hopes informs others.

Restoring Our Own Through Transformation (ROOTT) | reproductive justice organization
LG Doula | full spectrum doula, birth & postpartum photographer

Ashlee Johnson's passion for birthwork grew from her first pregnancy and childbirth. She would bring forth life three times with a dedicated birth team. She welcomed being pregnant and can recall the first pregnancy as an enjoyable time despite hearing so many negative stories that people felt compelled to share with her. It would be a chance encounter, during her first pregnancy, with one woman that listened to her birth preferences and encouraged her to go for it. She let that affirmation set within her and committed to honoring her own plans.

This foundation would serve her throughout the births of her other two children. Ashlee and her husband prepared by attending birth classes and feeling fully supported in a birth center and homebirth care. She describes her births as amazing because she felt educated, had a positive attitude, and had a birth team that met her expectations. In the early postpartum days, breastfeeding was challenging due to latch issues. Yet, Having set up a solid support system, she overcame the learning curves, focused on her healing, and addressed her postpartum depression.

For Ashlee, preparation is vital, expressing that no matter if birth plans shift, if you've prepared, you're in a better position to steer things your way. Using her own experiences and skills as a birthworker she created Birth Class in a Box - a carefully curated childbirth class that comes to you! We fell in love with the concept and decided to join her affiliate team. Use our unique PROMO CODE: BSiC and receive $10 off your purchase. Check out this great resource here.

Resources:

Birth Class in a Box | childbirth education tool

Gianna Fay, a Certified Nurse Midwife (CNM), tapped into herself as a resource as she ventured into her pregnancies. She also called upon people she had connected with along her journey as a birthworker. She started her first pregnancy living and working in Alaska. Gianna had access to the military base for care and where she worked. Allowing her to try out "centering pregnancy" at the base and thought it was a good option for them to allow her to "be the person pregnant." "Centering Pregnancy" is the process of having private physical exams completed by CNM's and doing all the other care as a group with other pregnant people. Other preparation included working out and curating a birth team to support her preferences. At the end of her third trimester, introspection through journaling and reading lots of positive birth stories (as a CNM, this helped clear her mind of all the things she sees daily). Gianna knew that she wanted to be in labor land, wanted to be a midwife and experience birth in her body with no interventions if possible.

After carefully planning and preparing for her pregnancy and labor support, she went into labor at 39 weeks three days with a huge gush of fluid in bed that woke her up. Labor moved faster than expected, and she welcomed her healthy son after managing her own choices. However, Gianna quickly noticed the shift in the room while her CNM was touching her perineum. Gianna turned back to her midwife brain; her CNM explained that she had a 4th-degree tear and needed to go to the operating room for repair. Her nurse brought baby Jacob to the operating room to initiate nursing, which was unexpected, but she was grateful for the provision. The immediate postpartum period was rocky, but her perineum tear healed better than she expected. Three months after giving birth Gianna, Evan, and Jacob drove nine days from Alaska to Michigan to start a new adventure.

Gianna and Evan discovered they were expecting again at the beginning of the Covid-19 pandemic. Gianna had planned a birthday trip to go back to Southern California and noticed she hadn't gotten a period. The day before leaving, she took a pregnancy test and confirmed their family was expanding again at six and a half months postpartum. They would welcome their second child as an unexpected blessing after experiencing the joy of their first child's birth. They were no longer living in Alaska and transitioning into new roles and responsibilities. Gianna desired to birth in a natural birth center, especially as she met most of the criteria to qualify for a low intervention experience. But her fetal growth ultrasound indicated severe intrauterine growth restriction. A wave of emotions began to move through Gianna as her midwife brain and birthing person brain started to conflict. She sought a second opinion and started to utilize her resources again to manage her care. However, she had unintentionally pushed the first domino, leading to a cascade of interventions. She would have an induction that tested her patience and will. She did not experience labor land or even feel like she was in her body like her birth with Jacob. Gianna had to pause and reset before going further down the road of interventions. The reset worked, and baby Elijah was born healthy and was not small, which confirmed what she knew in her heart. But she had coupled her knowledge of the medical system, her husband's feelings, and her self doubts after learning she had not been taking care of herself as well this time around, which all factored in her decision to move forward with the induction.

The pandemic made developing postpartum support challenging. The addition of having a toddler created new challenges that they didn't experience before. Her mother-in-law and sister were present as Evan traveled overseas with Covid-19 protocols extending the time frames. Returning to Gianna and his family, healthy communication and mental health support proved to be the tools they needed to get into a groove as a family of four.

Connect With Gianna:

Midwifay (Gianna Fay) | childbirth prep and consulting services

Midwifay Youtube Channel

Midwifay Private Facebook Group

Resources:

Birthing from Within | childbirth education, resources and doula services

Midwifay (Gianna Fay) | childbirth prep and consulting services

Chelsea always knew that her first child would be a son. However, she couldn't predict the circumstances of when she would become pregnant. A global pandemic would bring her aspirations of acting to a screeching halt as production stopped. She shifted gears as she needed to prepare for caring for herself and a new baby. Emotional issues developed as her relationship with her partner deteriorated. She felt alone. Depression set in, and conflict with friends and family grew.

She focused on preparing for birth by reading books, exploring hypnobirthing, and watching natural birth videos. Her pregnancy was challenging, and her provider didn't support her plans.

Elevated blood pressure, news that the baby was determined to be large for his gestational age, and gestational diabetes concerns overshadowed her birth plan hopes. Her provider started discussing a surgical birth before she had an opportunity to labor. She disagreed with her OB/GYN's preeclampsia diagnosis and decided to change from hospital birth to a birth center that could support her plans. She felt healthy for the most part during her pregnancy as she made sure she ate well, except for her sugar craving. The midwives at the birth center agreed to accept her for care. She didn't feel connected to them or fully confident about the birthing space, but she pushed forward as it seemed like a better option than the hospital.

Chelsea's membranes ruptured, and she contacted the birth center. She was told to rest and give herself time, and she eventually went in to have her fluid tested for amniotic fluid. After two days of leaking and intense back pain, she contacted the midwives, and they told her to wait again. She reported to the birth center on the third day, and her rupture was confirmed. However, she had not dilated despite feeling like her body had completed a lot of work. She kept herself active and wanted to use water therapy to support her comfort. She would manage the labor, but her cervix did not dilate. She would eventually transfer to the hospital to manage the rest of her labor. The hospital shift was challenging mentally and physically. Chelsea reached ten cms and immediately started to push even though her son was still high in her pelvis. A surgical birth became her last option, and it was quickly discovered that her baby had swallowed meconium and had fluid in his lungs. In addition, she had nearly hemorrhaged. She reflected on the intensity and degree of interventions in the hospital; everything she had wanted for her birth had crumbled. She felt disconnected from the people caring for her and the space she was in.

Carrying all of the trauma home with her new baby would be a rollercoaster. Therapy and group support have helped. She has also connected with the women in her family to help build her connections and heal. Healing comes one day at a time with intention.

Alicia Tetteh joins us for a second time after sharing her twin birth with us in Episode 57: The Body Holds the Score. Alicia and her husband, Solomon, discovered they were expecting their third child during the pandemic shutdown of 2020. Luna was a surprise for them but came with a new and experienced version of Alicia.

Alicia started with a previous hospital for care but added midwifery support as she considered birthing at home. After garnering support from Solomon, she began planning an intentional homebirth with a Black midwife for the pregnancy. Despite finding a Black midwife, she had difficulty finding Black birthers who had experienced a homebirth to offer additional support. They worked towards preparation for the birth by reading and leaning into the midwife to answer her questions.

The pandemic kept Solomon from attending appointments when they were still in hospital care. But they found other ways to keep him connected. Alicia planned a Mother’s Blessing that included her four friends that were also expecting. The blessing included belly painting, creating scented bracelets, flower crowns, and personal letters written from each partner to the birthing person.

Alicia admits that there were some unrealistic expectations about laboring at home that didn’t match the visuals in her mind or on social media. Labor started after a family walk through a petting zoo. When they arrived home, Alicia found herself unable to relax and move through the pain of the contractions. Her choices regarding food, music, and creating her environment ranked high on what she was thankful for. She contributes Solomon and Jesus for her ability to deliver their baby girl at home without medication. Her previous twin birth was a surgical delivery, and she had been numbed through the physical feelings of delivery.

Preparation for birth was high on the list; however, postpartum planning took a backseat. Alicia found herself unprepared, despite the memories of her twin birth recovery. The physicality of birth was heavy on Alicia’s body. There was support from family, friends, and their doula in the first couple of weeks. After the first month, sleep routines and managing twin toddlers took over their world. Solomon and Alicia have managed their “new normal” with teamwork and genuine co-parenting. Alicia wants moms to maintain their sense of self and have an identity outside of motherhood that helps them experience the joys of life.